Tag: pt duh

Marco Rubio Can’t Believe You Morons Thought He Was Serious About Immigration Reform

You might have heard some very disturbing rumors lately about true conservative Sen. Marco Rubio. Like, maybe he isn't so true conservative after all, because once upon a time, wayyyyyy back in 2013, he worked with the notorious Gang o' Eight to give free Obamaphones to illegals...
God's financial analyst.

You’re Off The Hook, China. Pat Robertson Says Stock Markets Crashing Because Of Abortion

Just like all U.S. Americans, Pat Robertson woke up Monday morning to news that the stock market is kinda batshit right now. It's plunging! Then rallying, kind of! Then dipping again! By the time you read this, only Jesus...

Tea Party Nation President: Obama Is Obviously A Gay Black Crack Addict

What are two things that are exactly the same? Are they "Arab witch-hunts" and "questions about Mitt Romney's tax returns"? No. Those two things are not the same, as we proved with our persuasive logic yesterday. But here are...

This Time, It Is U.S. President Barack Obama Who Is The Muslim Terrorist, Obviously

Why let Michele Bachmann and Louie Gohmert have all the fun? And why keep the accusations of Muslim terrorism to lowly Hillary Clinton State Department deputies, when you could set your eyes on the real prize? And that is...

Newt Gingrich: The Democratic Process Is a Terrible Act of War

Newt Gingrich will not be on the Virginia primary ballot, because he was having too much fun running for President on the teevee to be bothered to run for President in real life and hand in on time the...

A New Poll About Americans’ Hatred Of Muslims, Just In Time For 9/11

Get out your miniature American flags and get ready for all those chain e-mails from Grandma because it's almost that time of year again! It has now been ten years since 9/11, which means America has had ten years...

Tea Partiers Wonder If Lindsey Graham’s Gayness Is Causing Him To Be So Gay In Congress

Finally, some Wonkette agreement with the Greenville Tea Party of South Carolina: Why won't unmarried ex-Sailor Lindsey Graham, whose super-gay voice and constant gayness with Joe Lieberman and Walnuts McCain make him seem gay, just tell us the truth...

SOME BLOGGER KNOWS BIG SECRET ABOUT GAY FRENCH S.C. LIEUTENANT GOVERNOR ANDRé BAUER: The secret: André Bauer is gay! So says "gay blogger" Mike Rogers, who is famous for secretly "outing" every conservative person anyone has ever suspected of...