Ted Kennedy’s been dead for what, a decade or so, in Kennedy-zeitgeist years? It is high time America’s other Senators begin tactlessly speculating about who will get his ritzy deluxe Capitol Building office! Here are the specs: third floor, the Capitol Building, Mall views, “a rustic coffee table that appeared to be hewn out of the old deck of a sailboat,” etc. etc. “It sounds pretty,” said Alabama Senator Richard Selby. First, that coffee table thing actually sounds a bit kitschy. And second, hey, fuck you Richard Selby, show some RESPECT. That office belongs to Ted Kennedy’s ghost until Senate Rules Committee chairman Chuck Schumer gives it to someone else… But WHOM? MORE »

So overweight former baseball technician Curt Schilling will not be America’s new beloved Republican Ted Kennedy after all. Here are the known conditions that might have been factors in his proto-failure:

• He’s not even actually a registered Republican, which many political Beltway D.C. Boston insiders speculated would interfere with his ability to run on the Republican ticket
• Aggressive unpopularity

“Regardless of the amount of support and outreach that’s been given to me, it just did not make sense,” Schilling told someone at some point in response to all this. [CNN]

Remember when all the Kennedys were handsome and noble and square of jaw? They still have the jaw thing but everything else about them is crappy and disappointing. Join us as we walk through the Rogue’s Gallery of Remaining Kennedys and reflect on the Death of Camelot, etc. MORE »

Our best friend Mittens Romney must be so relieved that the old coot called him with a “no” for veep this year. Who’d want to be on the losingest loser ticket ever, in 2008? Sarah Palin would, sooo… yeah. Anyway, let’s see what Mitt Romney has to say and his Kumming & Going in his famously magical underpants, in Minnesota. We bet that he’ll LIE a few times, hmm? MORE »

• Heard on the Hill: DNC recruiters canvassed outside of the Camelot strip club. . . Former girlfriend of Rep. Harold Ford Jr. (D-Tenn.) writes a tell-all in Cosmo. [Roll Call]

• Rush & Molloy: Laura Bush brings daughter Barbara to see “Jersey Boys.” [NYDN]
• Reliable Source: Rob Thomas hits up Kiehl’s in Georgetown. [WP]