• BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD: This might be the most dreadful idea in American Business since… well… the idea of selling different telephone rings for 99 cents: “So safety experts, worried that hybrids pose a threat if pedestrians, children and others can’t hear them approaching, want automakers to supply some digitally enhanced vroom. Indeed, just as cellphones have ring tones, ‘car tones’ may not be far behind — an option for owners of electric vehicles to choose the sound their cars emit.” Oh, yeah, this is an old idea, it’s very popular in HELL. [NYT via Balloon Juice]

Kathleen Parker, a famous conservative person at the National Review who TRAITOROUSLY has some doubts about Sarah Palin, has received tens of thousands of wingnut e-mails from NR readers advising her to be retroactively aborted. And after Parker’s latest syndicated column, which appears on National Review Online today, she will probably get an additional 450 million e-mails telling her to simply die. One of these will probably come from NRO editor Kathryn Jean Lopez, who has posted a catty response to Parker’s column on the Corner in which she promises to kill Parker after the election. So let’s explore Parker’s column about how John McCain picked Sarah Palin just so he could fuck her, and the resulting denouement. MORE »

It’s summertime and the living is terrible.

Would you enjoy a Top Ten List of all the apocalyptic current events proving this is the End of America and probably The World? We thought you’d like that, you elitist doom-porn scumsacks. MORE »

The death toll in Burma could hit a million people, the worst earthquake to strike China in 58 years has already killed at least 9,000, more than 70 tornadoes killed more than 20 people from the midwest to the southeast, and NASA will make a terrible announcement on Wednesday about something horrific they’ve been nervously hunting for 50 years. MORE »