Tag Archives: protein wisdom

  Our Cold Dead Hands

Gun News Roundup: Wayne LaPierre Is A Vile Sack of Garbage, Plus Some Things You Might Have Not Already Known

Greetings, representatives of the People’s Glorious Wonkitburo! We thought we would start this edition of Our Cold Dead Hands with a gun-related tale that could have had terrible and tragic consequences for world diplomacy, but because no one was hit with any shotgun pellets, turned out to be amusing in a “Holy flurking shnit” sort of way. It seems that back in 2006, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was in New York for the United Nations General Assembly, that forum every year where the world’s craziest leaders get a chance to stand up and denounce the Zionists or water fluoridation or whatever plot their fortune tellers see in a bunch of goat entrails spread on a rock in their backwards desert kingdoms. One day during the confab, Ahmadinejad and his entourage were getting into their cars outside his hotel. Nearby, a Secret Service agent (the Secret Service guards foreign dignitaries when they are in the U.S.) was adjusting a shotgun mounted on the side of his Suburban when the gun went off. Luckily no one was hurt. Our favorite part of the story is that Ahmadinejad heard the shotgun blast, looked around, and seemingly thought to himself “Gunfire? Oh right, I’m in America.” Then he got into his car and drove to the U.N. because again, America, what are you going to do, amiright? Anyway, everyone close your eyes and try to imagine the nightmare of an international incident that would have been a Secret Service agent accidentally blowing away Iran’s leader on U.S. soil. During the Bush Administration, no less. And the Secret Service, you would think those guys would be be firearms experts! But no one was hurt or killed, so it falls under the rubric of an amusing, if frightening, little anecdote. It is not much, but we take what we can get at Wonkette. Read more on Gun News Roundup: Wayne LaPierre Is A Vile Sack of Garbage, Plus Some Things You Might Have Not Already Known…
  ps go fuck yourself

Internet Welcomes New Stupidest Man

Sorry, “Gateway Pundit” Jim Hoft, you have lost your crown and all your glory. All you need to read in this most brilliant piece from new Stupidest Man on the Internet “ProteinWisdom” (Jeff Goldstein) is the headline: Read more on Internet Welcomes New Stupidest Man…