prom

Hurrah, Yr Derp Roundup is back after a brief hiatus, and we are delighted to bring you a premium selection of the gunk that was stuck to our browser tabs, stories that didn’t quite merit a post of their own, but were too stupid to ignore altogether. We recommend adding the reality-dilution substances of your […]

Talia Maselli of Newington, Connecticut, is officially Yr. Wonkette’s favorite teen of the day, because of her excellent taste in men. Last fall, she sent a prom invitation to her ideal date: Old Handsome Joe Biden. Smart girl, thinks ahead. Unfortunately the Veep couldn’t make it, even after this seemingly irresistible pitch: “I am inviting […]

Perhaps you have a teenager getting ready for prom. You will of course be adorning them in the finest camouflage dresses that money can buy, but what about a corsage? Why not pick something classic, something that can be easily used for their shotgun wedding as well: the Kentucky Fried Chicken corsage. For the reasonable […]

Good afternoon and welcome to your heaping helping of Happy links. We actually really really unironically liked this camouflage prom dress! Stephen Colbert had to go to war with himself to figure out how he can remain a devout Catholic and a fervent cash-grabbing capitalist. You guys, go watch this fucking bawse of a cat […]

Virginia may be for lovers and mandatory ultrasounds, but it is not for girls who give daddies impure thoughts in their pants with their slutty prom dresses. A 17-year-old Virginia girl said she was kicked out of a prom for homeschooled teens because she aroused “impure thoughts” in some adult male chaperones. [...] The Richmond […]

The students at Corona del Mar High School in Newport Beach, California, are about to have their fun tradition ruined by political correctness, looks like, because the school administration is going to shut down an annual “prom draft” that somehow became a thing. It worked sort of like a sportsball draft, “ranking female students and […]

Hey teens! Are you ready for the most magical night of your lives, when you will go to Manitou Springs City Hall and dance like you are pretending to do butt-sechs, and then later you will finally lose your stupid virginity in a haze of Bartles & Jaymes? That’s right, PROM NIGHT! Well, two chaperones […]

Like any other girl who dreams of the magical night that is her prom, high school senior Texanna Edwards just wanted to dress up as the muscle car from “The Dukes Of Hazzard,” the General Lee. The lady who was the prom sponsor suggested before the Confederate flag dress was made that this was a […]

Everything was going great with the women and the men, who stopped fighting against women/each other this weekend just long enough to watch ‘Shark Tank’ and eat a few hot dogs, but now Michelle Obama has something to say. It is a picture, which as you know can say a lot, especially if the picture […]

As a presidential candidate, Mike Huckabee had no money, staff, or knowledge of foreign policy. He did have an economic policy, but it was the Fair Tax, that famously comical pyramid scheme. So how did he get the second most delegates? Metaphors. Extended metaphors. Millions of extended metaphors about key lime pie and yard work […]