Tag: prom

Awwww. Kids being out in high school makes yr Old Gay Wonkette verklempt.

Catholic School Denies Gay Kid’s Sacred Right To Date Boys From Other Schools

Here's a new one for you! We're used to stories like "Hey, you lesbian, you can go to prom with your lady-lesbian date, but you have to wear a pretty dress like all the other debutantes," and "Hey, you...

Gay Boy Gets To Go To Prom With Hella Cute Straight Boy Of His Dreams!

It is the weekend, which means we need a Nice Time, and it's a GOOD ONE. Remember prom? That thing that happened in high school where the mean kids spilled pig blood all over you, so you unleashed your powers...
Take THAT, tuxedo snatchers!

Super Rad Louisiana Lesbian Will Dance At Her Prom In A Tuxedo After All!

Well that was fast! On Monday, we told the story of a really cool high-school kid in Monroe, Louisiana, named Claudetteia Love. She's an out lesbian, and  she just wanted to wear a damn tuxedo to her prom, because...
Bad-ass Janelle Monae rocking a tux, GONNA BAN HER FROM PROM TOO?

Louisiana Principal Determined To Ruin Prom For Bad-A** Tux-Wearing Lesbian Honors Student

Priorities! Carroll High School in Monroe, Louisiana, has them! Claudetteia Love is 17, she is a top honors student headed to college on a full scholarship, and she would like to go the prom with her friends. She would...
Communist par-TAY

Very Smart Children Holding ‘Communist’ Prom To Warm Our Cold Tyrannical Hearts

Turns out conservatives were right. Decades of liberal indoctrination by commie thug teachers have trickled down to the high schools, and now the brainwashed students at Albuquerque's Cottonwood (COMMUNIST!) Classical (COMMUNIST!) Preparatory (COMMUNIST!!!) School have democratically voted, as one...

Derp Roundup: Fun Tips For Hiding Your Loaded Guns

Hurrah, Yr Derp Roundup is back after a brief hiatus, and we are delighted to bring you a premium selection of the gunk that was stuck to our browser tabs, stories that didn't quite merit a post of their...

Old Handsome Joe Biden Can’t Take Teen To Prom, Sends Corsage And Undersecretary Of Commerce Instead

Talia Maselli of Newington, Connecticut, is officially Yr. Wonkette's favorite teen of the day, because of her excellent taste in men. Last fall, she sent a prom invitation to her ideal date: Old Handsome Joe Biden. Smart girl, thinks...

Enhance Your Child’s Prom Experience By Making Them Wear A Piece Of KFC Chicken Strapped To Their Wrist

Perhaps you have a teenager getting ready for prom. You will of course be adorning them in the finest camouflage dresses that money can buy, but what about a corsage? Why not pick something classic, something that can be...

Cat Videos And Prom Pix In Today’s Happy Nice Time Links! Wait, What?

Good afternoon and welcome to your heaping helping of Happy links. We actually really really unironically liked this camouflage prom dress! Stephen Colbert had to go to war with himself to figure out how he can remain a devout Catholic and...

Homeschooled Slut Kicked Out Of Prom For Giving ‘Impure Thoughts’ To Creepy Dads

Virginia may be for lovers and mandatory ultrasounds, but it is not for girls who give daddies impure thoughts in their pants with their slutty prom dresses. A 17-year-old Virginia girl said she was kicked out of a prom for...

Mean O.C. Principal Kills Prom Date ‘Draft,’ Because She Is Old And Ugly, Maybe A Lesbo?

The students at Corona del Mar High School in Newport Beach, California, are about to have their fun tradition ruined by political correctness, looks like, because the school administration is going to shut down an annual "prom draft" that...

Heroic Colorado Ladies Lysol Students At Prom For Pretending To Do Butt-Sechs

Hey teens! Are you ready for the most magical night of your lives, when you will go to Manitou Springs City Hall and dance like you are pretending to do butt-sechs, and then later you will finally lose your...

Why Is This Tennessee School Racist Against This Nice Girl’s Confederate Flag Dress?

Like any other girl who dreams of the magical night that is her prom, high school senior Texanna Edwards just wanted to dress up as the muscle car from "The Dukes Of Hazzard," the General Lee. The lady who...

Michelle Obama Ends War On Women Ceasefire With Disgraceful Prom Photo

Everything was going great with the women and the men, who stopped fighting against women/each other this weekend just long enough to watch 'Shark Tank' and eat a few hot dogs, but now Michelle Obama has something to say....

Mike Huckabee Fantasizes About Prom Night Fling With John McCain

As a presidential candidate, Mike Huckabee had no money, staff, or knowledge of foreign policy. He did have an economic policy, but it was the Fair Tax, that famously comical pyramid scheme. So how did he get the second...