Tag: predictions

We chose this instead of a picture of Dick Morris. You're welcome.

Having Found Own Level, Dick Morris Now Sucking Toes At National Enquirer

Disgraced former Clinton aide turned rightwing hack Dick Morris has a new gig at the National Enquirer, and inquiring minds want to know if he can sink any lower. Probably!
She's got all the goodies

Screw The Polls, Here’s How Every Democratic Senate Challenger Is Gonna Win

We have told you a bunch of made up reasons why every single endangered incumbent Senate Democratic is actually going to win and Nate Silver can go suck a poll of likely voters. Now let’s examine the Dem candidates...
The first time I set eyes on Nate Silver, I just got that old-fashioned romantic feeling where I'd do anything to bone him.

How Every Endangered Senate Democrat Will Win In November, Because Why Not

It looks like Republicans are probably going to control the Senate next year despite how people don't like them, according to Nate Silver's FiveThirtyEight blog and other respected nerds. In 2012, Silver famously predicted the winner of every Senate race,...

Peggy Noonan, Of Course, Says She Was Right All Along

Presented without comment, because sweet Jesus Christ fucking your mom, how do you even ... what is the ... why can how for ... brain ... cracked ... shlobblemorfin hoowigah? President Obama did not lose, he won. It was...

Here Is Glenn Beck’s Very Unique 2012 Electoral Map

Well, over on whatever website or smelly airwave Glenn Beck currently resides, Beck and his friends/unpaid interns have decided to make some predictions about the 2012 presidential election upon which the fate of the universe rides. Here is Glenn's...

Ghost Of Breitbart Convinced That Obama Will Drop Out Of The Presidential Race

Breitbart hologram Mike Flynn has been feeling the warm breeze of change that causes the flag of America to gently billow across his cheek, and also has been sifting through the history books, poring over some of the most...

Nate Silver Must Be Fired From Statistics

Welllll Mr. Fancy Baseball and Politics Man knows nothing about the Oscars, apparently! He thought that Taraji Henson would win Best Supporting Actress and Mickey Rourke would win Best Actor. Silver's calculations excluded several important factors, including: 1) Penelope...

CHUCK TODD, MODERN NOSTRADAMUS: Your editor often braves the terrifying hell-beasts at the top of MSNBC's First Read because its authors really do have a way of putting a narrative frame around the news of the day. Yesterday we...

Charlie Crist Will Run For President In 2012

Here is a bold Internet prediction: the newly off-the-market bronze Floridian frat-mammal Charlie Crist will make a run for the presidency next go-round. After all the work he put into his failed quest for the Republican VP nod this...

Sarah Palin Planning 2012 Run, Will Be With America Forever

Jesus, has this 2008 election happened already? Like last week sometime? Nope, it starts exactly seven days from today, and will end sometime in December after all the dumb Virginia Democrats who voted November 5th are cast into the...

Joe Biden Terrifies Everyone With Promises Of Unpopular, Warmongering Obama Presidency

What is this weirdness? Joe Biden was talking to some supporters this weekend, at a fundraiser, about how Barack Obama will basically turn into a totalitarian dictator after he's elected, just like Hercules did when he rinsed all the...