Somehow it seems unlikely that this dude, who vows not to read Wonkette ever again, has read much of it in the past. MORE »

Mitt Romney thinks he can get elected the Republican president of the United States someday, even though he served as the governor of the People’s Republic of Taxachusetts and instituted a Cuban healthcare regime while in office. To commemorate his unhappy tenure as a hostage of the Massachusetts state legislature’s overwhelmingly Democratic majority, the state unveiled an official portrait of the former governor yesterday. If he looks uncomfortable, it’s because of the rectal spindle that attaches him to the desk. UPDATE: MORE »

Huzzah our prayers have been answered! Courtesy of the White House comes this darling portrait of Mrs. Obama and whatsername, “Just Say No,” shortly before sitting down to a dignified First Ladies’ seance. [Official White House Photostream]

Annie Liebovitz will photograph literally anyone, as long as they are marginally famous. Ever since Watergate she has taken portraits of schlubby double-chinned Administration staffers, so as to glorify the current President and reassure the nation that, while power changes hands occasionally, it transfers cleanly from one self-satisfied bureaucrat to the next. MORE »

We were going to do some kind of comedy thing, regarding this dumb story about the National Portrait Gallery unveiling the paintings of George and Laura Bush, but why bother when the, uh, the CBS Evening News is already on the job:

A Public Hanging (Of Sorts) For The Bush Family
You’ve seen him assaulted with a shoe, but care to see President Bush “hung?”

A Wonkette Refuse Desposal Spy sends us this snap taken while biking through beautiful Lisbon, Iowa recently during the RAGBRAI, which is Iowan for “bicycle ride.” Bikers and volunteers were asked to vote for president by throwing stuff in the dumpster for the earnest young Egyptian man or the sinister one-eyed albino villain. The fellow on the left won by a three-to-one margin, which is why Barack Obama is President of Iowa. [City of Lisbon]

Ok, he totally looks drunk. It’s not just us, right? He looks like he’s about to get all Richard Burton on Hillary (”You mentioned the child!”) and then maybe knock everything off that mantel and collapse in a corner, weeping. But let’s see what the artist has to say: MORE »