Tag: Pope Benedict

Vatican expert

Mike Huckabee Furious With Gay Liberals Who Run Roman Catholic Church

Did you know that Pope Francis is secretly a cousin-fucking hillbilly Mike Huckabee/Kim Davis supporter? It's true! (According to Mike Huckabee.) And did you know that the pope is being prevented from telling THE REAL TRUTH about how he...

Pope Francis Just Kicked The Entire Mafia Straight Out The Catholic Church

So last year we asked the not-new-anymore Pope to cool it on the whole Mafia-bashing, mostly because we don't want them to put a hit out on Francis. He hasn't gotten rid of nearly enough creepy John Paul II...

Let’s All Blame The Gays For The Pope’s Retirement

Oh boy, here we go! This week may have started out all "slow-newsy-snoozey" but never fear, wonketteers! The fabulous ruby-slippered Pope's retirement has become embroiled in a scandal described with words like "seething hotbed of intrigue and infighting." What?...

‘Leftists’ Say Mean Things About Saintly Pope: A Children’s Treasury Of Instant Butthurt

So, as you know, the Pope went all Brave Sir Robin today, but apparently it is very, very uncivil to make jokes about The Impressive Clergyman, or to mention that the institution he has led since 2005 has had...

Pope Admits Maybe the Church Has Been Just a Bit Rapey

Pope Benedict's trip to England started on a sort of racist, not-helpful note. But the Big XVI has recovered, and he even told the Limey newspaper men that you know, isn't it a pity the Church was able to...

Pope Finally Manages To Vaguely Admit Catholic Church Child Rape Might Be a Bad Thing

Nazi Pope Joseph Ratzinger flew on his supervillain pope-plane to Portugal and said a few words about the decades-long child-rape scandal destroying the Vatican Mafia's global bullshit business. This is apparently a big deal, that Ratzinger sort of half-ass...