pope
A creepy old priest-king clad in Prada slippers, flowing robes of silken embroidery and an enormous bejeweled golden hat warned Christians that the true meaning of Christmas was being lost to a sinful pursuit of “glitter.”
“In the 1970s, pedophilia was theorized as something fully in conformity with man and even with children,” the pope said. “It was maintained – even within the realm of Catholic theology – that there is no such thing as evil in itself or good in itself. There is only a ‘better than’ and a ‘worse [...]
“Please be gay HIV prostitutes. Please be gay HIV prostitutes. Please be gay HIV prostitutes.”
Well, not exactly BREAKING or whatever, unless you’re Catholic for some reason and didn’t see this yesterday: Some old European guy in a Rome suburb told a guy who was writing a book that some people should wear condoms, if they’re gay AIDS prostitutes in Africa who can’t help themselves from giving everyone AIDS. This [...]
Eddy Moretti and VBS Teevee traveled to Poland to interview former Polish president and Nobel Peace Prize winner Lech Walesa. They talked about dead Popes, and also how Glenn Beck is a total jerk. Our very own Liz Glover co-produces this teevee series, so you know it’s quality stuff! Watch:
Americans are talking about what’s happening! For example: “Men and women agreed that Jennifer Aniston is the most eligible single woman in the world, with 29 percent of the total votes. Halle Berry received 21 percent, while Elin Nordegren received 15 percent, followed by Betty White (11 percent), Lady Gaga (5 percent), and Elena Kagan [...]
Sometimes friends let old arguments get between them and keep them apart for much longer than they should. That’s why Pope Benedict XVI has decided to be the “bigger man in a funny anachronistic outfit” and plans to head up to Jolly Old England for a make-up visit. But does the Vatican believe that this [...]
Imagine if a BMW dealer in Oregon were discovered to be a serial child rapist. This would not necessarily reflect badly on his employer — not on the multinational parent company, run by a Bavarian, or on its U.S. subsidiary, or on his local dealership. But now imagine that, over the span of a many [...]
How is the Vatican’s decades-long child-rape international outrage not the Vatican’s fault today? The Pope’s lawyers are arguing in a Louisville, Kentucky court that priests and bishops don’t, uh, actually work for the Vatican. So, you know, not the Pope’s problem! Do not even *think* about indicting the Pope.
Current pope “Adolf Hitler” was raped by a spider today. Look at that lil’ guy, walkin’ and spider-poopin’ all over Il Popo. Kathryn Jean Lopez is not going to like this one iota. (For some reason we assumed this was a political video, what with the subject of this website and all, “politics.”) [Rumproast]
It’s no secret that certain earthly beings harbor no love for the current Pope, a self-made Prada-clad dandy with a troubled past of torturing Luke Skywalker with his laser-beam hands. But apparently not even the Pope’s own guardian angel likes him very much, because it let him break his wrist a few weeks ago.
