Wonkette

Hey everybody, remember Jessica Cutler? No? Well, a long time ago there was this Senate staffer aide and she had sex — including sex in the butt! — with men who gave her money or other valuables in exchange for the sex. This was different from all other human relationships because she, Jessica Cutler, made a blog about this, five years ago, when blogs were kind of a new thing. So how is she obviously involved with the Eliot Spitzer hooker scandal? MORE »

A shocking new study proves that Republican voters are having more sex than their Democratic counterparts, but Democrats are having less sex with more people, and everybody is basically watching pornography day and night, and both the right and left would happily let themselves be sodomized by the new president, in the White House, as long as that president is “attractive” to the kind of people who vote. MORE »

Playboy polled its readers as to which of two potential first ladies is sexier. And apparently it’s Bill Clinton over Ann “Mitt’s First and Only Wife” Romney. Because Playboy “readers” are all finally coming to grips with their homoerotic impulses, or something. Also because Ann looks like a middle-aged woman whose had like 500 identical sons, and Bill looks like an old horn-dog. They really shoulda done this with the trophy wives, though. We’d have our own “Mrs. Fred Thompson vs Mrs. Hottie Kucinich” poll but we have to live with ourselves.

Battle of the Sexiest [Playboy]

• What does Harold Ford do at Playboy mansion parties? “What happens in the grotto, stays in the grotto.” [Hot Air]

• George Allen writes (!) a post to make sure the blogosphere, “a powerful new branch of the media,” knows that he cosponsored the “Porkbusters” bill — along with 48 other Senators. [Redstate]
• Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama: the immovable object meets the unstoppable force. [The Gaggle]
• Rick Santorum is back on the “Democrats are Nazi appeasers” hobby horse, displays Winston Churchill book with pages stuck together. [The Carpetbagger Report]
• Sapped of his Joementum, Lieberman now ripping off Richard Nixon’s old Vietnam talking points. [YouTube]
• Blogger makes love to Excel, assigns arithmetical values to each member of Congress. [The Right Place]
• State Department makes sure soldiers in Baghdad can vote to keep Foley’s seat Republican. [Think Progress]

• Another nail in Cocktober’s coffin: everyone’s had the Foley emails since June. [Harpers]

• Duke Cunningham breaks out the crayons, scrawls letter to San Diego Union-Tribune. [TPMMuckracker]
• Fox News is preparing to serve their new masters. [MoJo Blog ]
• New anti-Coulter books fuel the hate-filled flattery she thrives on. [GalleyCat]
• Ironically, we only read blogs for the pictures of naked ladies. [Radosh]
• Are Saudis increasing the oil supply to lower prices and help the Republicans? They would, if they had any left. [Outside the Beltway]

• Bill Bennett: separated at birth from another fat blowhard. [Brains Over Bombs]

• The Condi Rice issue of Playboy will finally reveal her turn-ons, including, “a hard throbbing insurgency.” [The Anacostia Diaries]
• The massive anti-hotel-room-porn lobby badly stumbles when their ad featuring a masturbator in handcuffs incites more masturbation. [Pandagon]
• Power outage causes spontaneous orgies on Tokyo subway trains. [ Reuters]
• If you can’t get drunk on the plane, the terrorists have won. [BusinessWeek]
• Michael Chertoff got The Chase and Minority Report from Netflix last weekend, world to suffer. [Boing Boing]

* Names & Faces: Bono says he feels “exploited” by the use of his photo in campaign literature for Italy’s Silvio Berlusconi. [WP]
* Washington Whispers: Playboy and Penthouse are banned from State Department newsstands at the request of Condoleezza Rice. . . Josh Bolten recently cut work to watch a few Washington Nationals games. . . Fidel Castro could die within the next few years, American officials contend. . . Frank Luntz has a favorable view of Mark Warner. . . Rep. Nancy Pelosi misses the chocolate she gave up for lent. [USN&WR]
* Page Six: Site indicates Sen. Robert Menendez (D-NJ) may have kept a “love nest” with his former chief of staff. . . Jenna once woke Bush up and made him call her then-boyfriend Blake Gottesman after they fought. [NYP]
* Lloyd Groves’s Lowdown: Gore blames Bush for failures surrounding Katrina and 9/11 in the “green issue” of Vanity Fair. [NYDN]
* The Scoop: Susan Sarandon wants national elections to be monitored by a third party: “The last one was an embarrassment. Everybody knew there was fraud, but nothing was done about it.” [MSNBC]

Okay, maybe he is straight:

Supreme Court nominee Judge John Roberts, while serving as the head of Hogan & Hartson’s appellate division, spent about a dozen hours working on behalf of Playboy Entertainment Group in a case before the Supreme Court in 1999, his former colleague told HUMAN EVENTS.

Or is that trying too hard? (Ahem.) In any case: Snappy dresser, drama queen, big gay, total lawyer whore. WHAT’S NOT TO LIKE? MORE »