Even though WALNUTS! has the most tantalizing dry-rub recipe this side of Rudolph Valentino, an overwhelming majority of Americans would rather enjoy a tasty side of Barack Obama this summer. A survey reveals the tragic truth: nobody wants to hang out with the angry old war vet except other angry old war vets. MORE »

Q: How many bass players does it take to to revive their boss’ stagnant poll numbers? (AP) MORE »