Tag Archives: peter king

  Fear Of Peter King Perfectly Normal

Muslim-Hatin’ Rep: But Are White Terrorists Even Terrorists, Really?

Damn it, denial IS TOO a strategy
Congressfireplug Peter King (R-NY Somehow) was not at all impressed by last week’s report from the New America Foundation, which found that more Americans have been killed by rightwing terrorism than by Muslim extremists since 9/11. King serves on the House Homeland Security Committee, so he’ll have you know that mere numbers don’t tell the whole story, and also the report was carried in the New York Times, so it’s obviously worthless. There’s just no way that white supremacists and sovereign citizens are more dangerous than jihadis, because Pete King does not believe that. Read more on Muslim-Hatin’ Rep: But Are White Terrorists Even Terrorists, Really?…
  This Is The Worst Cruz I've Ever Been On

All Your Excited Reactions To Ted Cruz’s Big Presidential Jesus Announcement

These Rand Paul supporters were excited to be in the front row
Ted Cruz is ready to take America down the Jesus Road to national salvation, and some people are more excited about that than others. On the one hand, you have your Tea Party Nation, which declares Cruz “the only electable Republican” because he’s very smart and is “not handcuffed with the consultant class” that has kept Real Conservatives from winning the GOP nomination, and hence the presidency. And then there are fans of other candidates, like the Liberty University students in the photo above, who wore their “Stand With Rand” t-shirts for Rand Paul and made a point of sitting in the front row. Read more on All Your Excited Reactions To Ted Cruz’s Big Presidential Jesus Announcement…
  You know who else was just like Hitler?

2013’s Person Of The Year: Hitler, Who Was Just Like Hitler

Oh 2013, how we will miss you and your multitudes of bad analogies, even though we are pretty sure 2014 will bring us even more bad analogies, because America is awful and Americans are awful, and it is now standard practice to compare anything you do not like to really bad stuff and/or really bad people. Like Hitler. (Or, on occasion, if you’re feeling creative, Rwanda.) The Republicans’ government shutdown this year was basically like the Battle of Gettysburg. Why? Because! A similar trend this year is to compare horribly awful terrible people who do horribly awful terrible things to great heroes who did great things because why not? Like, the Duck Dynasty dude is like Rosa Parks. Why? Because! (See also Ted Nugent, who is like Rosa Parks, according to Ted Nugent.) And of course Rick Santorum is just like Nelson Mandela, in that Rick Santorum is trying to destroy health care and Nelson Mandela gave his country health care, but if you forget that Santorum is doing the opposite of what Mandela did, they’re basically exactly the same guy. You can’t even tell them apart! But nothing tops the bad Hitler analogies because Jesus, that has become more popular than taking feminist twerking selfies at funerals. EVERYTHING is basically just like Hitler nowadays. Let us do the squiggly line flashback thingy where we fondly recall all the ways America’s Greatest Idiots idiotsplained to us how things they do not like are JUST LIKE HITLER. Read more on 2013’s Person Of The Year: Hitler, Who Was Just Like Hitler…
  fingerpointing also too

The Super Awesome Government Shutdown Blame Game Has Begun

Well all right then. The government shutdown happened. While some Republicans were calling this “dance” something to “compromise” and “negotiate” into giving them exactly everything they ever wanted ever, and Democrats were “refusing to be extorted,” the clock instead struck midnight and everyone just went home, probably because they had finally run through all the liquor. So now certain “nonessential” departments and federal employees have been told today that their services will not be required for a while, even though these employees probably think that still getting paid somehow is. But this is when the “fun” starts, people, because nothing is more important when governmental departments are shut down and people are not getting paid than to fight about whose fault it is. And oh yeah, we are gonna fight about it. The time has come to rage. Read more on The Super Awesome Government Shutdown Blame Game Has Begun…
  man is that chicken tired

Your Morning Wonkdate On Congress’s Continued Fight For Title Of Most Embarrassing National Legislature

Wow you guys, yesterday sure was a fun day for democracy and we have so much to talk about this morning! What was your favorite part of the great SHUTDOWNGHAZI!!1!!??? Was it that time when the Senate, a body not known for moving with anything approaching alacrity, took less than an hour to strip three amendments from a House continuing resolution and send it back to the unruly chamber accompanied by a sneer and two giant raised middle fingers from Harry “The Stormin’ Mormon” Reid? Was it Peter King – Peter King and no we don’t mean the Sports Illustrated guy – briefly almost becoming the voice of reason and leading a revolt of moderates in getting a “clean” CR through the House? Was it the House Rules Committee meeting that apparently devolved into a sixth-grade girls locker room, with tired (and possibly drunk) representatives just stone-cold hurling insults at each other? (Rep. Jim McGovern, to whom we are sending reelection monies posthaste, told the GOP members on the committee that “people in your party should put grown-up pants on” and also wanted to know if “your Senator from Texas” had signed off on the plan they were debating. Meow, kitty can scratch!) Read more on Your Morning Wonkdate On Congress’s Continued Fight For Title Of Most Embarrassing National Legislature…
  not the cantaloupe guy actually

New York’s Peter King Yells ‘First!’ In GOP 2016 Comment Thread

Grumpy owl and New York congressman Peter King (R-IRA) announced this weekend that, having protected America from the Ground Zero Mosque and scary Muslims taking over America, he will now take his bigotry on the road and run for President of the United States. As the first GOP candidate to announce, he wins a special prize, which is for everyone to ask “Is he the IRA guy or the guy with calves the size of cantaloupes?” (Answer: Yes.) Read more on New York’s Peter King Yells ‘First!’ In GOP 2016 Comment Thread…
  a plague o' both thy houses

Peter King Compares Rand Paul To Hitler Appeasers, Brilliantly Avoids Godwin’s Law

Rep. Peter King (R-NY) managed to invoke Hitler yesterday in a historical context that did not involve insane hyperbole, but instead reflected an actual comparison between isolationist Republicans of the 1930s and today. Referring on CNN to Sen. Rand Paul’s contention that the “tax and spend wing” of the Republican party is too fond of foreign wars, King replied “What this reminds me of, someone like Senator Paul and others in that isolationist wing,” King continued, “you know the Republicans had this debate back in the 1930s when you had the isolationists and the Charles Lindberghs saying we should appease Hitler, then the Democrats had it in the 1960s when the anti-war movement blamed America first and in both cases it hurt the party for years, each party was hurt for years.” “I’m afraid that is what Senator Paul is going to do with us. He wants to retreat from the world. He wants to isolate ourselves, go back to ‘Fortress America.’” Ever happy to nitpick, Yr Wonkette will now delightedly nerdsplain why King has not run afoul of Godwin’s Law, even if his analogy is still pretty much crap. Read more on Peter King Compares Rand Paul To Hitler Appeasers, Brilliantly Avoids Godwin’s Law…
  they hate us for our freedom -- why did we elect them?

Peter King & Lindsay Graham: NSA Scandal Proves Americans Need To Be Watched More Closely (Updated)

Peter King (R-Stasi) has taking the very brave position of calling for the prosecution of reporters that publish classified data. Presumably, he is only referring to the classified data leaked by whistleblowers, NOT the classified data accidentally revealed by Michele Bachman during primary debates, and definitely not the classified data selectively leaked to news outlets by the administration. In any case, Peter King is taking a helpful stance: since the terrorists hate us for our freedom, the best way to protect ourselves from attacks is to just have less and less of it as a precautionary measure. Below is Peter King’s response word for word, so you can be amazed at every logic-bending morsel.  So eloquent is he that he DOESN’T EVEN NEED to mention the Supreme Court’s per curium opinion in the Pentagon Papers case. Behold: Read more on Peter King & Lindsay Graham: NSA Scandal Proves Americans Need To Be Watched More Closely (Updated)…
  prism planet

Politicians Welcome Chance To Discuss This NSA Surveillance Monster They Hid In The Basement

Over the weekend, various security officials and congresscritters were forced to go on the morning yap shows or talk to the press about the secret data collection programs exposed by the Guardian over the weekend. Some of them took this opportunity to explain why they were glad, GLAD, that we are finally having a national conversation about the classified top secret eavesdropping and metadata collection programs that they hid from the American people. Others patiently warned us that this classified top secret eavesdropping and metadata collection program had definitely prevented terror but that they couldn’t tell us exactly HOW it prevented terror, because that is secret, silly! But it is definitely keeping us safe, although it also missed the Boston Marathon bombings, and the Times Square bombing attempt, and the Fort Hood shooting. And still others just stressed that the classified top secret eavesdropping program is somehow effective enough to prevent terrorism but not so effective as to actually compromise anyone’s privacy. Below, a rundown of the various machinations and meltdowns! Read more on Politicians Welcome Chance To Discuss This NSA Surveillance Monster They Hid In The Basement…
  and this is why we still cover the bullshit out of glenn beck's mouth

Looks Like Glenn Beck Has At Least Four Listeners In The House Who Want To Know About Saudi ‘Bomber’

As the world waits on its tenterhooks — which are surprisingly comfortable, and shaped liked a sofa — for Glenn Beck to release his DAMNING EVIDENCE about the US government coverup of the SAUDI NATIONAL who has already been cleared in the matter of the Boston Bombing, we learn that Beck has at least four listeners. They are Homeland Security Chairman Michael T. McCaul, Chairman Jeff Duncan of the subcommittee on Oversight and Management Efficiency, Chairman Peter King of the subcommittee on Counterterrorism and Intelligence, and Chairman Candice Miller of the subcommittee on Border and Maritime Security, and they sound fun and not at all stupid!* Read more on Looks Like Glenn Beck Has At Least Four Listeners In The House Who Want To Know About Saudi ‘Bomber’…
  Shhhhhhhhhhhhh

Rep. Peter King Leaks Government Secrets To Threaten National Security Some More

If there’s one thing New York Rep. Peter King (R-OF COURSE) hates — besides Muslims, obviously — it’s people who leak classified information because they hate America. (Why else would they leak classified information, right?) Leaking government secrets is like an “invitation to murder” basically, according to Peter King. Like that one time there were leaks about the raid that killed Osama bin Laden because President Obama sucks or something? He especially hated that: Read more on Rep. Peter King Leaks Government Secrets To Threaten National Security Some More…
  wanting hurricane relief is so yesterday

Today’s John Boehner Update, In Which Peter King Dashes Our Dreams of Continued Fightsies

Remember yesterday? Yesterday was AWESOME. Yesterday was the day when everybody – literally, everybody ever – hated John Boehner for behaving in a cartoon-villian-level of evil fashion and not bringing the Sandy relief bill to the floor. Leading the mob, avec pitchforks, was our surprising new hero Chris Christie, who rolled up and brought it. Peter King was no slouch, though, threatening to leave the Republican party (UNBEARABLE LOSS, YO!) over the whole thing: Read more on Today’s John Boehner Update, In Which Peter King Dashes Our Dreams of Continued Fightsies…
  when you've lost peter king you've lost america

Even House GOP Hates House GOP Today

Did you spend the new year’s holiday careening from half-truth to quarter-truth, rage to amusement, regarding the House GOP and the fiscal cliff? We did! Yr Wonkette was relieved that the whole thing went down on New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day, which absolved us from having to write all that much about it in real time. Small blessings, people. We really can’t pass up the opportunity, though, to remark upon the skull-crushing dickishness of the House GOP refusing to bring a Hurricane Sandy relief bill up for a vote: Read more on Even House GOP Hates House GOP Today…
  return of the rat

Giuliani Considers Running Again For President of 9/11

The problem with the Republican race for president, so far, is that there’s just not enough of the “craven opportunist stunt candidate on the make who also has a dreadful personal life.” Newt Gingrich just can’t handle all of this by himself! And Donald Trump never needed the money. Is there somebody else kind of like Trump, in terms of being a sleazy New York gazillionaire who gets married every few years and also probably performs abortions for fun? Yes, there is Rudy Giuliani. There is always Rudy Giuliani. And according to noted Muslim-hater Peter King of the Anti-Muslim Kingdom of Long Island, Rudy didn’t get shamed enough in 2008 so he might be coming back to lose big all over again. Read more on Giuliani Considers Running Again For President of 9/11…
  but muslims hate ham radio

IRA Terrorist Peter King Now Wants To Take America’s Amateur Radio Band

We thought he was plenty busy hating on Muslims — and why can’t the Muslims just shut their halal-holes and enjoy America’s endless bloody pointless murderous wars against Muslim countries, anyway? — but Rep. Peter King is also trying to shut down America’s ham radio frequencies. Read more on IRA Terrorist Peter King Now Wants To Take America’s Amateur Radio Band…