pete souza
Here’s the Death-Stare Face Obama Made While Waiting Yesterday
by Jack Stuef
America, this is just a guess, but it’s probably not a good idea to make Obama angry. “We’re gonna need a new vein!” — Obama’s face of death. This whole photo is pretty much the greatest picture of the century so far. Joe Biden is like, “Murhp?” And Hillary Clinton is like, “OMG!” (This is [...]
It was bound to happen sooner or later to President Serious Face.
Joe Biden Requests White House Photograph Him In Kinky Voyeur Style
by Jack Stuef
Disgusting. [Twitter]
President Obama Accidentally Washed Down Giant Drain
by Ken Layne
It’s not easy being the president during a sustained industrial/economic collapse! But Barack Obama bravely went to Willy Wonka’s munitions factory somewhere in Ohio or someplace, and then Barack Obama did a bad thing and tried the Every Flavor Dinner Gum, which includes “fried fat curds,” which are against Michelle Obama’s rules, so the crazy [...]
Obamas Spend Holidays With College A Capella Groups, Worshipping Dog
by Jack Stuef
Thanks to Jackie Kennedy being hott that one time she lived there, the White House is supposed to be a place of well-decorated holiday majesty at this time of year. But the Obamas are ruining it by hanging out with singing asthmatic white college guys and forcing everyone around to worship their horrifyingly faceless dog, [...]
When the war is over, in the wee small hours, when your tie is loosened and you just want to have a cigarette and bullshit on the phone with another brother who likes his smokes, that’s when you open the last bottle and put Kind of Blue on the stereo and accidentally call John Boehner, [...]
Obama Team Bored of Nation’s Problems, Still Loves the Blackberry
by Ken Layne
Look at all the president’s men having so much fun on their Fantasy Lacrosse League while poor people talk about their troubles, with Obama!
Bob Woodward’s new book, This Obama Guy Did 9/11, will be that thing everybody in Washington buys on Monday even though they read all the sad dirt today in the newspapers. Obama’s own supporters just bitched at him for 10 hours on Monday during a tragic town hall. The economy is probably going to be [...]
Socialist Practical Joker Puts Thumb (Foot) On Scale of Capitalism (Scale of People’s Weight)
by Jack Stuef
President Barack Obama jokingly puts his toe on the scale as Trip Director Marvin Nicholson, unaware to the President’s action, weighs himself as the presidential entourage passed through the volleyball locker room at the University of Texas in Austin, Texas, Aug. 9, 2010. That’s your prez! Always with the jokes! (When he’s not GOLFING.) Nice [...]
White House Photo Website Implies Chuck Todd Is Plastic Water Bottle
by Ken Layne
Here is the actual caption to this official White House photograph by Pete Souza: “President Barack Obama is interviewed by Chuck Todd, of NBC News, at Gerald R. Ford International Airport in Grand Rapids, Mich., July 15, 2010.” Mmhmm, but we only see one person in this picture and it sure isn’t MSNBC poli-nerd Chuck [...]
Aww, look at the nice old couple dancing to the oldies on this nice cruise ship, in space. Who are they, anyway?
White House-BP Party Looks Like So Much Fun
by Ken Layne
Here’s Barack Obama and Tony Hayward and the rest of the sad BP people and bitter White House people sitting around sipping glasses of lukewarm vinegar ‘n tears, earlier today. People are usually really excited to go to the White House, even if they hate the president or whatever, but we’re pretty sure all these [...]
‘Not Half-Kenyan, Gov. Brewer … I’m Actually Half-Mexican’
by Ken Layne
Guess who’s coming to Cena? It’s anti-Mexican lady governor Jan Brewer, fresh from her family’s Time Machine Battles with Hitler! After enjoying a Taco-free lunch, Brewer told President Obama she’s sorry but she will need to see his papers to make sure he’s American. And whaddya know, he said he left his Birth Certificate on [...]
America’s Collapse Briefly Stalled By Sexytime Obama Pic
by Ken Layne
Terrible oil spills destroying however many states/Gulfs of Mexico? Stock market collapse, again? Who cares, just look at these sexy grownup people dressed all fancy and not having sex affairs with bloggers or whatever.
The world’s most terrible criminal, Barack Obama, can’t even honor America when he throws the “first pitch” at the baseball game. Here is scandalous photographic evidence posted by the White House photographer on the White House Flickr website showing the war-crazed pacifist literally practicing for his first pitch at the Nationals’ game the other night. [...]
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