Oh, you want a dog? Here is a dog for you, straight from the fires of HELL. You can dress it up in a sweater and some lipstick, and it will look exactly like Liz Taylor. This is a Peruvian Hairless dog, ancient pet of the Incas. It is prone to acne and blackheads. Some crazy Peruvian lady wants to give it to you because she hates America. [MSNBC]

Oh hey what is that sort of wet popping sound? It is the heads of thousands of Bitters exploding as they discover that Barack Obama is worse than a Muslim. He is a South American voodoo skull cultist! Thanks to Brian for the tip. [CNN]

Despite Lou Dobb’s daily foaming-at-the-mouth routine, the Senate today passed legislation to implement a free trade agreement with Peru by a vote of 77-18. This comes hot on the heels of the decisive 285-132 House vote last week. I guess everyone likes cheaper shit in time for the holiday season, as long as there’s not an election coming up too soon and the bill acronym doesn’t rhyme with NAFTA. [NY Times]

The evil UFO that crashed in the mountains of Peru has sickened hundreds of people. Which candidate is most prepared to battle the space monsters? [Associated Press/Living In Peru]