NAPOLITANO TO RUN HOMELAND SECURITY: Barack Obama has asked the Arizona governor Janet Napolitano to run the useless, bloated Department of Homeland Security. She was frequently mentioned on Obama’s short list of possible vice presidents, but presumably that would have been just too many vowels on the ticket, so she gets this instead: figuring out how to keep an influx of Canadian terror-squads from invading Minnesota. [Politico]

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