Are you ready to be shocked? Not just shocked, but SHOCKED? In an effort to scoop the VOX-FiveThirtyEight-Industrial-Statistical-Complex, has put together a super-sophisticated voluntary online poll that asks the really tough questions: Do you want to make more money, or less? Do you want to know the results? Can you even imagine what those […]

If Congress signs off on the Pentagon’s latest plans, the US Army will be smaller than it’s been since before your grandpa fought at the Battle of the Bulge, Iwo Jima, Pearl Harbor, D-Day, X-Men, and Cracker Barrel, yer Gramma got a coupon. This might look like a “cut” in the sense that something is […]

The problem of misconduct by America’s Military Leaders is a very serious matter that deserves serious attention. Happily, many fine publications are doing that, so let’s talk about this WaPo story about the fapping colonel. As part of a story on officers being less than gentlemen, the Post found the tale of Brigadier General Martin […]

Happy Gayvember, everyone! How is the Pentagon defying G_d today? Per Stars and Stripes: Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel on Thursday sharply criticized U.S. states that are defying the Pentagon by refusing to allow National Guard facilities to issue ID cards that enable same-sex spouses of military members to claim benefits. “This is wrong,” Hagel said […]

Gays have it so easy, man. They can marry in 13 states, people – THIRTEEN! That’s as many as were originally in America when Jesus walked across the Atlantic Ocean to found this nation! And they can serve openly in the military, no longer having to fear being outed as they risk their lives in […]

From Fox Nation, another exciting claim with only a tangential connection to reality: “VIP Treatment: Accused Fort Hood Shooter Gets Daily Helicopter Rides.” How shocking! We bet he gets his very own toilet, right in his cell, too! Why on earth is Major Nidal Hasan gallivanting around in a helicopter like some kind of king, […]

Everyone who works for the government is a secret agent now. Their mission: spy on their coworkers just to make sure nobody leaks information — classified, unclassified or totally obvious — to the American public, but especially that Glenn Greenwald guy. (Yeesh, that guy. Amirite, General?) So, how does one educate these career civil servants […]

Wonkers of the Cold War era (which is like all but seven of you, right?) may remember the somber documentaries about the grim job of manning missile silos, with the narrator intoning that the 2-man crews had standing orders to shoot their partner if he went insane. (This may not actually be true, but we […]

Oh dear lord, what is President Obummer making the Pentagon do now? Well, nothing, actually, but that has never stopped the conspiracy theorists at Breitbart from saying stuff anyway, so let’s see what they’ve pulled directly out of their asses today, shall we? The Pentagon has released a statement confirming that soldiers could be prosecuted […]

Mitch McConnell was a busy guy back on Nov. 14 — it was the day of the first Benghazi briefing, for one, and it was also the day he happened to be re-elected Senate minority leader. Amid all this excitement, however, he also sent a letter to the Pentagon’s congressional liaison, asking about a very […]

Shit, guys, I’m pretty sure our secretary of defense hates women. Leon Panetta has lifted the ban on women serving in military combat roles. He hates them so much he wants them to be equal! This is a travesty. We have abandoned all of our values — at the very least the ones where women […]

Right around the time in 2011 that Robert Gates was ordering everyone who knew anything about the operations of the strike that offed Osama bin Laden to shut the hell up in the name of Secrecy, a newly-released document obtained through a FOIA request shows that top Pentagon and CIA officials were holding hot gossip […]

Sure, every single human shelled out good money this past weekend to watch their nerd fantasies come true and all of their favorite funnybook superheroes (at least all the ones owned by one specific media conglomerate, and not counting Spider-Man because he has his own movie coming out later this summer, we guess) come together […]

A group of weepy warlords in the Senate including ol’ Jowls McGoo Joe Lieberman are busily soiling their Depends over a $487 billion planned reduction in defense spending over the next decade that was included in the White House fiscal year 2013 budget. But know who is not having a whiny meltdown over the proposed […]

Most people, when they imagine combat troops fighting in a war, picture gunfire and helicopters and blood and death. Rick Santorum, on the other hand, pictures sort of a dusty night club lit by the odd intermittent explosion where you know what happens when you leave the boys and girls alone in there too long […]