pennsylvania
Joe Biden has one job this election: to get the Bitters in Pennsylvania to vote for a black Muslim. That is literally all he has to do. Maybe Ohio, too, but mostly Pennsylvania, because he was of course born there! In Scranton, the famous town where Happiness goes to die. On Friday, he went to [...]
You may remember Tony Rodham from the 1990s when he and his brother Hugh were constantly getting their sister Hillary Clinton in trouble by securing pardons for their buddies, befriending hostile foreign leaders, having affairs, doing drugs, and so forth and so on. They were not very classy folks, unlike their morally stalwart sister and [...]
Maverick John McCain is at it again, sticking his finger in the eye of the Republican establishment by saying he wouldn’t rule out a pro-choice running mate. Two names came to mind — Tom Ridge and Michael Bloomberg — and in a recent interview with the Weekly Standard McCain strained to point out that Ridge [...]
While Barack Obama continues to putz around like a jerk on vacation in “exotic” Hawaii, John McCain has been campaigning across Pennsylvania with Tom Ridge, the guy who inexplicably decided he’d rather serve as George W. Bush’s powerless anti-terrorism bitch than remain a popular governor of a large state. Well, the Pennsylvanians are just loving [...]
When a gentleman loves a state very very much, he gives it a box of chocolates and then asks it to go “parking” with him, and then he gropes it for a while and if his love is truly true, he opens up a “post office box” in that state. Thus, a declaration from John [...]
Hey, here is a sexy state scandal while we wait for Hopey to set up his podium ‘n stuff! Pennsylvania State House Majority Leader H. William DeWeese might have to resign because his chief of staff allegedly hired some youngster he (the chief of staff, Michael Manzo) was banging to do pretty much nothing for [...]
Huzzah, here are some new fake polling results from Quinnipiac today: Obama 47, McCain 43 in Florida; Obama 48, McCain 42 in Ohio; Obama 52, McCain 40 in Pennsylvania. Now Obama will be president for life and McCain will be banished to Mongolia to start a new life as “Maverick of the Yaks.” [The Page]
