Wonkette

Aaron Brown was a kindly gent who hosted the CNN many moons ago. Every night Americans would drift off to sleep as he reviewed the morning papers with a dumb little rooster crowing in the background. And we all loved it because he was Aaron Brown, a very nice man, and then Anderson “Silver Fox” Cooper threw him under the bus and took his show. It looks like Aaron learned his lesson because now he has gray hair and no glasses, just like Anderson Cooper. So what’s he up to now, besides adorably swearing his face off for Observer reporters? MORE »

Lovable PBS anchor Jim Lehrer hasn’t been on his show lately because he was busy getting his heart re-plumbed with various valves and nozzles. Word has it the procedure went smoothly and he will be back in a few weeks. Wonkette congratulates him on his new Robot Heart and wishes him a speedy recovery. You, the reader, may write to him here! [PBS]

Since Barack Obama couldn’t answer the important question “Is Jeremiah Wright as patriotic as you are?” with any shred of decency in last week’s ABC debate, Wright is now explaining his obvious black hatred of all things white on his own terms. His First Televised Interview will appear on PBS tomorrow night, but we have excerpts, and they’re predictable, etc. etc., why is he such a Christian Muslim? MORE »

And what will make tonight’s debate so awesome? No Rudy Giuliani! No Walnuts McCain! No Mitt Romney! And of course, like always, no Hollywood Fred Thompson. It will basically be Tavis Smiley and Ron Paul politely calling each other racists while a hostile all-black crowd watches, with hostility. Oh yeah, and we also get a special appearance by Alan Keyes, who will boldly stand up for Tom Tancredo and call everybody else racists. MORE »

It’s time, everybody, it’s time! Feel the disconnect as Nightly Business Report segues to PBS Presidential Primary Forums With Tavis Smiley. Ladies and gentlemen, get your cocktails ready.

Come on in, the water sucks.

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* Official “How’s Tim Johnson doing?” spokesman Harry Reid says, “Just fine.” [WP]
* Colin Powell faces the nation, calls for new strategy in Iraq that incorporates full withdrawal by 2007. Also notes, “there really are no additional troops” to send to Iraq, so there better be another plan. [WP, NYT]
* Somalia’s Islamist government just dying to get on the wait-list behind Iran and Syria. [WP]
* Newt Gingrich wants to join the has-beens, also-rans, and have-rans in 2008. [WP, NYT]
* Evan Bayh, on the other hand, is happy to watch Obama and Clinton slug it out from the comfort of his living room. [WSJ]
* Administration plans to stiff pharmacies on Medicaid, just to save a lousy $5 billion. [NYT]
* Military espionage program started by Donald Rumsfeld to get “close scrutiny” by Robert Gates. [NYT]
* “I’m gonna get that wascally wabbit!” exclaims Margaret Spellings as PBS’s lesbian-friendly Buster Baxter returns to the air. [NYT]

* House Republicans say corruption is a perceived-reality: “We must realize that the Majority we have all worked so hard for is in jeopardy.” Leadership race will likely become a “referendum on how seriously the party is taking” the scandal. [WP, NYT]
* Republican lawmakers call for White House to disclose records about Jack Abramoff; Abramoff met with Bush during at least six “social occasions.” Anonymous source: “The White House is making too much of a mystery out of this and needs to release the dates, times, details and photos of the visits. It’s not like [Abramoff and Mr. Bush] were plotting to overthrow Iraq.” [LAT, WT]
* Bush will use State of the Union to preview midterm campaign themes and paint optimistic portrait; speech avoids “ambitious” proposals. Senior administration official: “America ought to be leading the way, working to shape events. We’re always better when we’re out there shaping events, rather than being shaped by them.” [LAT, WT]
* Challenge of Bush’s State of the Union falls on William McGurn, the director of White House speechwriting. McGurn: “He seems in a good mood. Part of his good mood, we hope, is that we give him something good to read that reflects what he wants to do.” [NYT, USAT]
* Interior Department offered emergency services and personnel to FEMA in the “immediate aftermath” of Katrina but received a delayed response. [WP, NYT]
* Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill.): “I think that the Democrats have to do a much better job in making their case on these issues. These last-minute efforts, using procedural maneuvers inside the Beltway, I think, has been the wrong way of going about it.” [WT]

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• Todd S. Purdum leaves NYT for Vanity Fair. Have fun editing the society heiress crack whore stories, Todd! (We don’t expect to be invited to the Oscar party, anyway.) [Romenesko]
• George Clooney v. Bill O’Reilly in the battle of the Irish blowhards. [NYP]
• WSJ show jumps to Fox from PBS, because that is where people will watch it. [LAT]
• CBS “wooing” Katie Couric to Evening News, because that is the only way that people will watch it. [LAT]
• And, right, we were just bought by the Times. You didn’t hear? No? I’m enjoying a Cristal body massage right now even as we speak. Maureen, fetch me the La Mer! [New York Press]

For those who didn’t tune into PBS’s Frontline last night to watch the chilling documentary, “The Torture Question,” the Post has just conducted a Q&A with its producer Michael Kirk. MORE »