Wonkette

Former Bill Clinton strategist Paul Begala, the squirrelly hobbit to James Carville’s mangy elf, spoke at a breakfast in New York City this morning and used the occasion to vent about how much he hates Mark Penn, Hillary’s ex-Chief Strategist and current chief strategist. Because everyone hates Mark Penn and that is why he is… still working for Hillary Clinton! But do most “Clinton people” go so far as to compare Penn to Donald Rumsfeld? The hobbit goes, because the hobbit knows. MORE »

In the upcoming January 2008 issue of Architectural Digest, readers can check out the house in which Democratic strategist James Carville and Republican strategist Mary Matalin enjoy their weird marriage. Of course, a normal-looking house wouldn’t really suit well with the craziness of either. That’s why they have a very pink, cosmic, acid-trip of a house. Pictures of the Crazy, after the jump. MORE »

This week, Joe and Hadassah Lieberman, Henry Rollins, Ian Svenonius, Paul Begala, Harriet Miers, Ralph Nader, Conrad Burns and Scooter Libby were all spotted being various degrees of famous at various places by our spies and operatives. Voyeuristic fun, as always, is after the jump.

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* Hate crime legislation makes Jesus cry. [Traditional Values Coalition via Pandagon]
* Mike Huckabee’s son busted for carrying a handgun and at least 50 extra pounds through the Little Rock airport. [Radar]
* Iraqi government spokesman Dan Bartlett not happy about the timeline bill. [The Left Coaster]
* And neither is Joe “I Hold Harry Reid’s Life In My Hands” Lieberman. [GOP Bloggers]
* Paul Begala is so fucking pissed at that “gasbag” David Broder. [HuffPo]
* Sam Brownback’s in the closet … on immigration. [Hit & Run] MORE »

• Ratings dip at Fox News Channel completely unrelated to Americans’ growing distrust of administration. [TVNewser]

• Roger Ailes knows more war equals higher ratings, orders anchors to “Sell! Sell! Sell!” [Think Progress]
• Why is Joe “committed Democrat” Lieberman trying to ruin the party’s chance to take back the House? For spite, that’s why. [The Carpetbagger Report]
• The Office of National Drug Control Policy might as well roll-up their funding and smoke it. [DARE Generation Diary]
• Ted Steven’s spokesmen issues flimsy denial/lie about the pork hold, as the Senator doesn’t deign to answer bloggers directly, or know what a blog is, actually. [Instapundit]
• Handy new “lie-line” covers history of Iraq War from first bullshit uttered in August 1990 to falsities spread in March 2003. [Mother Jones]
• Paul Begala not happy with the direction of the country, fine with herpes. [Washington Fix]

A reader just emailed us: MORE »

* Two top judges questioned the legality of warrentless eavesdropping twice in the past four years. [WP]
* White House agrees to provide additional information to House Intel Committee about NSA eavesdropping. [WP, NYT]
* Bush condemns violent reaction to cartoons that mocked Islam as Condoleezza Rice says Iran and Syria “have gone out of their way to inflame sentiments and have used this for their own purposes.” Bush: “We reject violence as a way to express discontent with what may be printed in a free press.” [WP]
* Years of “significant cuts” will be necessary to meet deficit goals. [WP]
* Sen. Arlen Specter (R-Penn.) proposes that a special court provide oversight of eavesdropping. [USAT]
* Bush, aiming to “bring fiscal sanity” to Washington, signs bill limiting growth of Medicare and Medicaid. Bush: “People call it a cut in Medicare. That’s not a cut. It’s slowing down the rate of growth. It’s the difference between slowing your car down to go the speed limit, or putting your car in reverse.” [WP, NYT, USAT]
* Democrats strive for “understandable” agenda with their own “Contract for America.” Paul Begala: “If it were up to me, I’d be tougher and meaner. But you’re trying to unite a diverse party.” [USAT]

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Throughout the day, we’ve delivered celebrity sightings of Bob Novak, that human-animal hybrid; more Supreme Court justices than you can shake a stick at; and the man that everyone’s talking about, Jack Abramoff.

Now we bring you an added bonus: a sighting of a possible future POTUS, Senator John McCain!

Sitting in National, waiting to catch the shuttle flight to NYC, when McCain sits down in front of me. Multiple people keep coming up to him to talk. A woman in her mid 50’s comes up and says, “Why, Senator McCain, you are so much better
looking in person!” McCain says thank you.

As she leaves, I lean in and say, “Senator, I know how hard it is to be so devilishly good looking.” McCain starts cracking up, and I continue by saying, “I’m glad that worked — it was that or a Jack Abramoff
joke!”

The laughing stops; McCain proceeds to raise his paper over his face. I get up and walk away.

Good stuff! And the fun’s not over yet. Go the jump page — click on that pointing finger — for sightings of such boldface names as Susan Collins, Tony Williams, Mark Warner, Karl Rove, Joe Lockhart, Paul Begala, Bill Frist, and many more!

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Wonkette readers are no Googling monkeys, but they do know their way around a high school yearbook. Two theories dominated the guessing game about the meaning of this headscratcher:

* A SMART SUGARLAND MOVE BY BEGALA, per the Washington Post: “Adults With Wisdom Teeth Often Develop Gum Disease.” (That one is an inside joke intelligible to precisely seven Note readers.) LINK

First: Paul Begala is from Sugar Land, he had his wisdom teeth removed while there, and thus is one smart guy, able to pat himself on the back this morning after a general round of back patting generated by the the rest of the morning’s news. This is not much of a joke, but it does make some kind of sense. MORE »

As some readers may remember, Wonkette periodically offers a “Decoding the Note” service, wherein we unscramble the onanistic self-references of Washington’s most insufferable political tipsheet so that civilians can also appreciate their insidery tediousness. Today, however, we admit that we’re stumped:

* A SMART SUGARLAND MOVE BY BEGALA, per the Washington Post: “Adults With Wisdom Teeth Often Develop Gum Disease.” (That one is an inside joke intelligible to precisely seven Note readers.) LINK

Wow, seven people, eh? Do the seven people on the masthead count? In any case, we defer to the hive mind of the Wonkette readership on this one, though we’re completely willing to make up a backstory if the real one can’t be found. Some conjectures so far: MORE »