Wonkette

BLACK AND WHITE: The American People see Barack Obama’s ads as positive, hopeful messages of hopefulness, while John McCain’s commercials are universally seen as cheap, bitter little sacks of negative bile. That’s why 48% of The People are tired of hearing about Obama. [UPI]

Important news from the Wonkette Inbox(!): “Today on TNR.com, Dayo Olopade offers the definitive fact-check of Paris Hilton’s energy recommendations in her new ‘campaign’ video. While Hilton’s video is perhaps a humorous response to McCain’s recent ‘celebrity’ ad featuring her likeness, Olopade concludes that even Paris, alas, gets the facts wrong on offshore drilling.” While this seems like the perfect setup for a Rick Roll, or a blinking screen that says “No Shit,” Mr. Olopade did, in fact, write this article challenging Paris Hilton’s claims. What’s next? Jamie Kirchick’s imaginary response? UPDATE: Oh dear, someone e-mails to say that it is actually “Ms.” Olopade, which we strongly considered Googling to confirm, but now we’re just racist. [TNR]

Oh that wacky Paris Hilton, seizing on the moment. Here she is wearing a creepy swimming gown and responding to John McCain’s dumb ad about her in an internet video from some comedy website we’ve never heard of. Top story on Drudge? Mission accomplished, obviously. [Funny Or Die]

We told you how Paris Hilton’s grandfather and dad were furious about John McCain’s idiot commercial comparing Barack Obama to white party girls, which was the horrible stunt that finally brought RACE into America’s colorblind politics. But now Paris’ own mom, Kathy Hilton, has published her terse tirade against the campaign her ultra-rich family once supported — she put it right there on Huffington Post, which is Rich America’s version of Twitter. MORE »

John McCain and his loser friends are all racists, which we know because they made an ad with Britney Spears and Paris Hilton but not Brad Pitt, Tiger Woods, David Beckham or The Police. Can you even believe it. Back here on Planet Earth, however, there actually was some pretty clear racial shit coming out of the McCain campaign yesterday — not necessarily in their accusing Obama of playing the Race Card, but in the cleverly chosen words they used to accuse him of this. Horrible subliminal racist anger over O.J. Simpson, meet the candidacy of Barack Obama. MORE »

There’s been a hilarious debate on the Internet the last couple of days, as per usual, about whether the McCain “Celeb” ad was Racist because it chose two young white gals, Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, as Barack Obama’s alter egos instead of the actual two most famous celebrities in the world. It is, apparently, a similar situation to the attack ad on Harold Ford in 2006, where he is constantly talking to loose white women on the telephone. If John McCain were to *objectively* pick the two most famous people in the world, the liberals argue, at least one of them would have been TIGER WOODS, the GOLFER. The conservatives do not believe Tiger Woods counts, however, because he has accomplishments!

Prepare to rock and/or roll. MORE »

While everybody else was laughing at that ridiculous Paris Hilton/Obama ad the McCain people released yesterday, at least two very wealthy Republican donors were furious: William Barron Hilton and Rick Hilton, Paris’ grandfather and father. MORE »

WASHINGTON (AP) — Screaming and crying, Irve “Scooter” Libby was escorted out of a courtroom and back to jail Friday after a judge ruled that he must serve out his entire 30-month sentence behind bars rather than in his home.

“It’s not right!” shouted the weeping Libby, who was convicted of four felonies in a reckless spy-outing case. “Mom!” he called out to Dick Cheney in the audience.

MORE »

Last week, “mercado libre,” the Argentinian eBay, featured a quickly-removed auction for Barbara Bush’s stolen cell phone. The auction started at 1,000 pesos, and the seller jokingly declared that the phone would be delivered to the winner by Osama bin Laden himself. MORE »

It’s Wednesday, and you know what that means: 25

Oh, Paris! On this, the day that a transcript of your defamation-based deposition with lawyers for Zeta Graff has hit Page Six, we finally, truly understand the difficulties inherent to the life of an heiress. Namely, the lack of a good, old-fashioned enrollment in finishing school. MORE »

Never let it be said that the government cares more about rich people than the rest of us:

DURBIN: I sent a letter to the attorney general yesterday, applauding the fact that the Justice Department had, in fact, successfully prosecuted in Massachusetts a person who had hacked in and stolen the telephone records of Paris Hilton, and I ask the Attorney General to please ask our Special Counsel in this case to take a look at the precedent of the Paris Hilton case and see if he can perhaps protect our records as much as we want to protect that poor young lady’s telephone records.

RELATED: Paris Hilton Hacker Sentenced [PC World] MORE »