Posts Tagged ‘palin’

Nazis, Racists, and Terrorists (Not Just Bill Ayers! But Also, Bill Ayers!)

Tuesday, October 7th, 2008

One of Palin’s antebellum friends, an Authentic American, told a black sound guy to “Sit down, boy!” at one of her Floridian rallies. [Washington Post]
When Obama was hooking up with Bill Ayers, he claims he didn’t know that Ayers was a terror-worshipping Communist demon. This means that Obama is Not Ready to nuke Ahmadinejad’s palatial sex dungeon in North Korea. [The Corner]
Every time Bush kisses McCain softly on the forehead, a mustachioed ginger in Florida loses his home. [Ben Smith]
In the 1980s, McCain had a fairly impressive neo-Nazi porn collection which he often sold in the Facebook Marketplace in order to benefit Latin American terrorists like Bill Ayers. [Huffington Post]
Pakistan is going out of business, because countries apparently can do that. Naturally, it wants a bailout, so John McCain is driving the Straight Talk express to Kashmir, to supervise. [Crooks and Liars]

Wednesday, September 24th, 2008

McCain pays his celebrity makeup artist $5,000 per session. Why won’t Cindy chip in for the 2 Whore Diamond upgrade? [Us Weekly]
America is saved, hooray! Meet the Palin Plan: “Congress not pointing fingers at this point at … one another.” Quick! Let’s go do this thing! [Matthew Yglesias]
Campell Brown wants to know why the Sexist Media does not ask Sarah Palin tuff questions even though the media is forbidden to speak to Palin, who is kept inside a snowglobe. [Ezra Klein]
Oh dear, some racist Quakers hung Obama in effigy, in Oregon. The Decemberists opened. [Oregon Live]
Bill Clinton says he can’t campaign for Obama — or do his Calc homework — because of September’s twelve Jewish holidays. [Ben Smith]

Tuesday, September 23rd, 2008

Europe will not buy worthless America from Hank Paulson, who is selling it for six homosexual Lincoln pennies. [Crooks and Liars]
The EPA has been spiking your drinking water with rocket fuel, which means water is now $100 a barrel. [Daily Kos]
McCain owns three foreign cars, and the only American vehicles he does have were made for him in a children’s sweatshop in Michigan by Barack Obama. [Marc Ambinder]
The only known exchange between Palin and Karzai was Karzai telling Palin his son’s name is Mirwais and Palin responding “Oh nice.” Sarah Palin knows of no other thing on this Earth besides baby-naming and even this she cannot do correctly. [Jonathan Martin]
Even Joe Biden thinks Barry’s dumb teevee commercials are terrible. Literally, he called them “terrible.” [CNN Political Ticker]
According to Norm Coleman, the federal government will turn a profit from the total implosion of the economy. [Andrew Sullivan]

Tuesday, September 16th, 2008

Palin opposed some bill preventing Alaskan sexual violence and then, just in keeping with tradition, fired its main proponent. [Daily Kos]
The powerful International Tanning Association stands by its gal Palin and decries the terrible and nonexistent “sun scare industry,” which is Alaskan for “liberal MSM” or “people with skin cancer,” depending on your inflection. [Matthew Yglesias]
Palin thinks Alaska produces either 6 times or 3 times as much energy as it does, depending on if you believe she’s a colossal idiot or, as her office would have you believe, half a colossal idiot. [Ezra Klein]
Why won’t Barack Obama pose for post-coital webshots with Joe Biden? It’s because he is ashamed, unlike photogenic best friends McCain and Palin. [RedState]
For no reason, Palin lied about some teleprompter in Ohio being broken and will now try to fire that telepromter, for working. [Andrew Sullivan]
According to its ex-CEO, Palin, Biden, Obama and McCain don’t have what it takes to run Hewlett Packard, which is a relevant skill to practically everything. [Ben Smith]