Wonkette

Remember when those nuts on the right, Michelle Malkin and Charles Johnson, condemned beloved fast food bakery Dunkin’ Donuts for letting teevee chef Rachael Ray wear a Palestinian scarf in this ad? Dunkin’ Donuts first released a statement saying that no, it was not the Palestinian kaffiyeh design at all, just paisley, and a SCARF. Despite being categorically incorrect, the wingnuts have somehow “won” and Dunkin’ Donuts will pull the ad due to the “possibility of misperception.” Jesus. [Boston Globe]

Oh no! Condi’s stuck on repeat! Or maybe shuffle! She went places, she met people… but it all seems so familiar, like she’s just coasting for the next eight months or something. I don’t know about you, but there are some Condi reruns I’d much rather see, so let’s use the magical, revelatory power of Photoshop to pump up the Condiweek that was… after the jump, natch!

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Jimmy Carter started his unofficial but CONTROVERSIAL visit with Palestine’s Hamas leaders today and here are the first naughty AP pix. Look: the Hamas is such a terrorist group that they have guns! They will shoot Carter if he does not lie face-down on the cement as that greeter is clearly instructing him to do. Good Lord, Jimmy Carter is old. More pixxx after the jump! MORE »

A Condoleezza road show is so much fun! Our Condi bounced from Egypt to Ramallah to Tel Aviv to Brussels, enjoying several perfect photo-ops along the way. The only problem was that outside the photo-ops, it was one of the most incriminating Condiweeks EVER, brimming with embarrassments, snubs, that Gaza Strip thing, and OMG, Glenn Kessler! So mean! Let’s all pile on with Glenn after the jump!

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Al Gore’s endorsement may or may not ever happen. The Iraq War may go on forever. The economy is broken. However, Roseanne Barr wrote something about Barack Obama today:

How will Obama handle his Jewish problem? He has to pander to the pro Zionist Jews of America and at the same time talk about dismantling support for Israel in order to appeal to his “progressive” followers. How he handles this one is very telling about his “judgment”. He just refused to condemn Israel for ghettoizing the Palestinians. Who is he really?

Yes, Roseanne Arnold. We know that he’s a Muslim. We’re not stupid. [HuffPo]

So the photo-ops in Israel and Palestine are going pretty well; things are better already vis-a-vis the President’s rosy forecast. Just today, after driving through the West Bank to hold a press conference with the Palestinian President, Bush told reporters regarding the various checkpoints, “You’ll be happy to know, my whole motorcade of a mere 45 cars was able to make it through without being stopped.” They didn’t stop you? You must know someone or something. [al-Jazeera]

George W. Bush is on vacation in the West Bank today, telling everybody about how great things will be in 2009, after he’s mercifully out of office. According to our sad, ignored president, the Middle East will finally see peace, love and understanding next year. Why? Because everything will magically get better after Bush is gone. Here are some other predictions from our optimistic pal: MORE »

Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™! Last week was all about Condi’s big Carnival o’ Peace™ in Annapolis. Yes! That was only a few days ago! Not much happened, but that didn’t stop people from writing about it. Plus: more excerpts from Elizabeth Bumiller’s Condiography which is maybe going to be serialized in Maureen Dowd’s column. And, finally, it was Mean Caricature Week! After the jump, we’ll relive the Condiweek that was.

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The big news in fake diplomacy today is Condi’s Middle East peace conference, which held talks in Annapolis, MD this morning between Israel, Palestine, Syria and some other horribly screwed places. It just so happens that this Wonkette editor is living in Annapolis until December, so what a coinky-dink! I went down and took some pictures of the protesters, which included Code Pink, a guy who looks like Santa Claus, some old ladies and various anti-Semites. Check out the gallery, the aesthetics of which are sure to bring peace to all troubled nations across the globe.

What has Condoleezza Rice accomplished in the past week? The answer is always the same: nothing! What has she been doing, where has she been going? Well, that’s a more complicated question. Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™! This past week was really fun in Condiland! Like her illustrious mentor, G. H. W. Bush, she inspired a new foreign language insult! It was her birthday! Something about laser helmets! And at the end of the week? OMG, new hairdo. Did you hear me? NEW HAIRDO.

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Formerly beloved childhood icon Mickey Mouse has shown his true colors: he’s as reflexively anti-American as any other coked-out limousine liberal Hollywood star. MORE »

* Rudy for prez: because he will never put a de-clawed ferret into his ass. [Horse's Mouth]
* Hillary changes private jets more often than you change underwear, even has the days sewn in them like you. [NYP]
* “The only thing that can save this country is a military coup.” [NRO]
* Oprah gets on the Barry Hussein train. [Newsmax]
* Military took away the porn and now goes for the blogs. Way fight for fascism, fuckers. [Wired]
* The Speaker of the Palestinian Legislative Council would like to reiterate his point in case anyone is unsure: Death to America. [Jerusalem Post]
* Bill O’Reilly insults someone every 6.8 seconds. [Romenesko]

* Bush admin: J/K everyone, FISA can totally have jurisdiction over the illegal secret wiretapping program. Please don’t yell at Alberto Gonzales too much today, Senate Judiciary Committee. [NYT, WP]
* The Bush legacy would’ve probably been something about creeping executive power, but lately he’s been conceding it to everyone. [NYT, WP]
* A “bipartisan” (read: involving Chuck Hagel) group of Senators prepared a useless symbolic resolution opposing THE SURGE in Iraq. Clinton wants to get tougher, withhold funds, give John Edwards a wedgie. [WP, WP]
* NYT prints dumbest lede this week: “The climate here has definitely changed.” [NYT]
* Condi Rice is in Berlin chatting about Israel and Palestine with German chancellor Angela Merkel. What Rice learned out there: people be sick of getting blown up. [CNN]
* Barack Obama will need to be careful about staying fresh, beloved over these next two years. [NYT]
* Everyone’s got an “exploratory committee.” Except Clinton, who might see her fundraising ability sonned by the early adapters. [WP]
* Ethics reform legislation stalls in Senate. Pig to have to find alternate source of lipstick. [NYT]