Tag: palestine

Boris Johnson, Noted Lout And Buffoon, Is England’s Next Top Model

As Americans we don't really care what the rest of Not-America does because they have to do whatever we tell them or risk receiving our freedom bullets. However, some foreign policy analysts (nerds with thick glasses, funny accents and...
Is Louie Gohmert a Ferengi? We're only asking!

Don’t Accuse Louie Gohmert Of Callin’ Obama A Terrorist, ‘Twas An Innocent Question

This one seems a little out there, even for the mighty mental power that is Texas congresstoad Louie Gohmert: In a floor speech in the House of Representatives, Gohmert wanted to ask -- just ask, mind you -- whether...
Loser. Again.

Sore Loser Mitt Romney Loses Again, Like A Loser

Shocking news! Perpetual loser Mitt Romney, who swears he's done losing presidential elections but we're not sure we believe him because he is Mitt Romney and he loves losing and we love watching him lose, did not win his...
Why can't more operas be about American Exceptionalism?

Wingnuts Will Save You Poor Jews From Getting Pogromed By Metropolitan Opera

Time for an Arts Update! The editor of Superpatriot and disgraced torture aficionado Allen West's blog is so mad at the Metropolitan Opera that she's just about ready to go to New York's Lincoln Center and stage a mock...

Cuddly Bee Character On Hamas Kids’ Show Shares Whimsical Jew-Killing Tips

This Hamas teevee show for kids, Pioneers of Tomorrow, is pretty hardcore compared to American kids' shows. No messing around with letters or numbers or the Magic of Friendship; instead, this loveable Bee Guy explains the joys of attacking...
GOHMERT!

Louie Gohmert Fears John Kerry Is A Wizard Who Has Cursed Israel And Will Bring God’s Wrath Upon U.S.

Louie Gohmert, always on the lookout to prevent the doom of our nation, is extremely upset with John Kerry for having suggested that maybe it is a bad thing the way they treat the Palestinians and that maybe they...

Israel Having Time Of Its Life Live-Tweeting Assault on Gaza

Maybe Israel doesn't have a choice but to explode chunks of the Gaza Strip, because Hamas has been shooting rockets into Israel. And maybe not! We are told we must support The Good Guys, though, because of the Bible,...

Romney: The Things I Say All The Time Are Debunked And Selectively Edited

As it turns out, we need not see what was in those missing two minutes of video from Romney Gone Wild: 47% Of His Clothes Off. Willy Mittens is now declaring the video "debunked and selectively edited" for some...

‘Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Too Hard To Solve,’ Says Forceful Leader Mitt Romney

A happy Mitt Romney Whitey Tape Day to each and every one of you! By now, you are well aware that Mitt simply does not care for the 47 percent of Americans who, due in part to tax-cutting...

Hot New Guardian Pundit: Novelist Alice Walker and Holocaust Survivor Helped Arm Terrorists

People (mostly liberal elitists) were a little disappointed when the Guardian announced that Redstate.com cofounder and former George W. Bush speechwriter Josh Treviño would be joining its team of U.S. columnists. This is because back in June 2011, as unarmed...

WSJ Spews Bunch of Racist Garbage in Defense of Romney’s Racist Garbage

Oh look, another asshat was given space in the Wall Street Journal Op-Ed section, and it seems fair to say that this asshat is even more ill-informed than the last one. What’s particularly surprising is that this particular asshat,...

Mitt Romney Did Not Say Any of the Things You Heard Him Say

Who ELSE can Romney offend, now that he is done insulting England, praising socialism (seriously), scheduling a $50,000 per plate fundraiser on a national day of fasting set aside to commemorate Holocaust victims, making thinly veiled anti-Semitic comments praising...

Mitt Romney’s Slaphappy Israel Party: A Roundup

Mitt Romney had mondo problems winning over the British on the first leg of his diplomatic photo-op vacation, so you know what? Screw the "Special Relationship." Israel is now more special-er to the United States Empire than England ever...

Ever Since Arafat Turned Him Down, Newt Swears Palestinians Don’t Exist

A long time ago, when amoral sperm whale Newt Gingrich was simultaneously banging another extramarital bimbo and prosecuting Bill Clinton for an extramarital sexytime, Newt was also deeply in love with Palestinian heartthrob Yasser Arafat. In this newly rediscovered...

Newt Gingrich Wants Everyone To Know Palestinians Are Pretend People

This is a Thing People Are Discussing, today: smartest being of all time Newt Gingrich declared in an interview that the Palestinian people are "invented" in his grand historical estimation, sort of like how all peoples with their fancy...

Barack Obama Is Now Secret Muslim President of Palestine

Maybe Barack Obama's attitude about 2012 is "Fine, you want this country? Please, help yourself," because he is moving on - to the Middle East! Where he belongs, according to everybody's handful of (crazy?) relatives who think Barack Obama...