Tag Archives: pajamas media

  she seems nice

Elegant Pajamas Media Lady Blogger: Jesus Would Hate Today’s Poor People, Who Should Be More Like In Dickens

ATTENTION POOR PEOPLE: Pajamas Media blogger Kathy Shaidle would like you to stop being boozy crackheads who spend all your money on weaves and tacky club clothes, at once and now! Let us listen to the good lady’s gentle murmurs on the subject, as she has some Bible Science she would like to drop on us: [To]day’s poor are often petulant, entitled, irresponsible, and ungrateful, caught up in a culture of crime and cheap thrills. Jesus ordered us to love the poor because He understood how hard it was to do, even 2000 years ago. But in 2012, I’d take that further: our “poor” have become the “rich” Jesus warned us about. Congratulations, Kathy Shaidle! “Jesus: What a Fucking Idiot That I Know So Much More Than” is a very bold premise! Read more on Elegant Pajamas Media Lady Blogger: Jesus Would Hate Today’s Poor People, Who Should Be More Like In Dickens…
  good thing there's not a bullet point shortage

Janine Turner: Convert Your Liberal Friends To Reasonableness By Calling Them Stupid Traitors

Famous 1990s actress Janine Turner (“Northern Exposure,” “The Night of the White Pants”) has joined the other most famous lady GOPer, Victoria Jackson, in going full wingnut, as you could probably tell by this terrifying picture of her going as Nancy Reagan for Halloween except that that is always how she looks now aiyeeeee! Anyway, Ol’ Janine over there is a “writer” now for Pajamas Media, and this is very exciting, and her first column is a holy shit of a tl;dr wherein she takes apart the word “girlfriends” with each letter forming a different way to convert your idiot liberal Hollywood bitch “girlfriends” to reasonableness by explaining that they are stupid traitors. What fun! Let’s take apart some of it (it is literally a list of 63 bullet points) until we are bored! OK, it starts with an introduction where Turner explains that it is hard being a conservative Lady at a table full of blah commie Whoopie Goldbergs, and old feminist battleaxe Baba Wawas, and the talky one, you know, the Jewish one, because conservative women are too sweet and nice to stand up to them. But Turner will show you how! G: Get Reasonable. Want to teach your children that laws don’t matter? Be a Democrat. Knowledge is power and reason is a civic responsibility. Our United States Constitution is the law of the land. Democrat think the Constitution is irrelevant because it restricts them. Read more on Janine Turner: Convert Your Liberal Friends To Reasonableness By Calling Them Stupid Traitors…
  Things that suck

Watch This YouTube Video Before Jihadi Psychopaths Murder You

Andrew Klavan is a crime novel writer and contributing filmmaker on Pajamas Media’s PJTV Internet teevee station, which, when we just clicked onto it in order to gift you with its URL, offered this top story: “The Star Hustler: An Eclectic Genius Who Believed We Are Each Unique.” Whoah, trippy, man — gimme a motorcycle and some Zen rage and let’s blast “Born to Be Wide” and head on down the highway to the next Tea Party rally-adventure. Anyway! We were talking about Mr. Klavan. He has a new movie out, called “Does Islam Suck?,” in which he answers his own question. Read more on Watch This YouTube Video Before Jihadi Psychopaths Murder You…
  i see what you did there

Huffington Post Makes All of America Believe Israel Is Devil By Cropping Photo

Pajamas Media is still updating its website, somehow, and today we have IMPORTANT NEWS about the front page of another Internet website. It seems Huffington Post has EVILLY CROPPED A PHOTO of Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu so that it looks like he has ANTLERS! Wait, DEVIL HORNS! DEVIL HORNS! That’s it. This kind journalist has brought this to our attention and has even done some shoe-leather reporting on this amazing sign that the Huffington Post is brainwashing us to hate Israel. Read more on Huffington Post Makes All of America Believe Israel Is Devil By Cropping Photo…
  today in warring

Hey Government, Here’s How You Throw Over Kim Jong Il!

Every human with a brain clearly understands that the best way to “deal with North Korea” at this point or really any point is to nuke Kim Jong Il in the butt, kill all of its civilians (children first, because what do they know?), donate the women to Wall Street banks which can use them as reserves against further drops in mortgage-backed securities, e-mail Texas’ oil to North Korean aquifers so that it might be drilled up, for profit, Establish Free Markets of dildo retail chains, and what else, oh right, let American colonizers vote for shit periodically. This is the respectable centrist opinion, and the government is ready to just run with it once it gets maybe 2 or 3 more specific details about how to actually carry out the invasion of this country. Fortunately, for them, a Pajamas Media columnist has UMM ALREADY DONE THIS? Read more on Hey Government, Here’s How You Throw Over Kim Jong Il!…
  rumors on the internets

Ahh, Someone At Pajamas Media Got A Hold Of Final Cut Pro!

Do you want to take a ride about the “Zobama Xpress,” a children’s school bus that apparently runs on racism, dry ice, and tone deafness? Yes we can! [The Washington Independent via Andrew Sullivan] Read more on Ahh, Someone At Pajamas Media Got A Hold Of Final Cut Pro!…
  friendly fire plz

Joe The Plumber: “Oh… Reuters”

We really hate to give Pajamas Media traffic for this bullshit, but they’ve outwitted us with their lack of embed code… damn! YOU MUST WATCH this latest video from Joe the Plumber. He makes fun of REUTERS for not being as good at journalism as he is. Hey, someone who understands computers: please put this on YouTube, so we don’t have to go to this terrible gay death website anymore? UPDATE: Thanks! They’ll probably pull this sooner or later, but there are backups. [PJTV No link for you!] Read more on Joe The Plumber: “Oh… Reuters”…
  joe the plunger

What Is With All This ‘War Reporting,’ Anyhow?

Ladies and dudes, it’s Joe the Plumber, reporting from Sderot, Israel! And … wow. This miserable slob can’t even bother to put on a collared shirt when he does his “reporting,” which is really just bitching about how he “liked it back in World War I and World War II” when you would get all your war journalism at the movie theater. Is Joe the Plumber truly the world’s largest known example of a human dildo, or is he a brilliant performance artist sent to us by Jesus/The Onion, for laffs? [YouTube] Read more on What Is With All This ‘War Reporting,’ Anyhow?…
 

Fox News Personality Revealed As Fair, Balanced

Our favorite right-wing blog network held a party/panel thing at the National Press Club last night, and a youthful communist of some sort was able to sneak in and get the dirty details. August J. Pollak’s report is filled with shocking revelations such as: Read more on Fox News Personality Revealed As Fair, Balanced…