paintings

Haha, we tricked you! We stole the title of this post from the upstanding fellows at the Washington Free Beacon, who are fucking idiots. They are such fucking idiots that they think the paintings of the greatest living president (GEORGE W. BUSH OBVS) look like the work of Degas and Manet! No, they look like […]

And this is a painting of George W. Bush, as unveiled at a White House ceremony that just wrapped up. Look at ‘im. He’s like, “Boy howdy don’t I look good, hummina hummina.” And no, it wasn’t “awkward,” this ceremony. Some folks have suggested that the atmosphere might be uncomfortable since Barack Obama has been […]

Our old pal Jon McNaughton, the hero behind such paintings as 2009′s One Nation Under God (The Jesusy-Constitution one) (Don’t forget the Blood Remix!) and 2010′s The Forgotten Man has produced this new masterwork, One Nation Under Socialism, which you can purchase for a mere $345. What does it mean, this work of paintery in […]

In an effort to keep yourself from vomiting, you should probably close your eyes as you read this post. Birther Lucas Smith, who was last seen in an affidavit claiming Orly Taitz asked him to perjure himself and also recounting another birther guy’s claims about the narrowness and viscosity of her womanly passages when she […]

Remember that “labor-themed mural” in the Maine Department of Labor headquarters that wingnut teabagger Paul LePage ordered removed, because his administration hates Maine’s working families? The U.S. Department of Labor says Gov. Paul LePage violated the terms of a federal grant when he removed a labor-themed mural from a state office building last month. Now […]

Screaming “This is evil,” a woman tried to pull Gauguin’s “Two Tahitian Women” from a gallery wall Friday and banged on the picture’s clear plastic covering, said Pamela Degotardi of New York, who was there. What was wrong with the painting? Was it the heaping melons? No, it was the three (3) total exposed boobs […]

Did Da Vinci have trailers for his paintings, you ask? No. But that I-talian bastard has nothing on Jon McNaughton, who, you will remember, gave the world that lovely painting last year depicting Jesus delivering his freelance Constitution to the People. Jon McNaughton has REDEFINED art itself. And now art is dumb paintings of American […]

This is real, you guys! The Florida Republican Party, as part of its ongoing efforts to scrub any hint of association with pariah Charlie Crist — most of which just involves wiping all of those orange smears from the walls of their headquarters — is selling Crist’s official state portrait on eBay. It cost the […]

Well how about this! Jacksonville artist David Durrett sends this “real painting” (super-sized) to your Wonkette and writes, “I love Wonkette, and was inspired to do an acrylic response to the Jesus painting yesterday! Hope you like it!!” Yes it is very nice! Maybe Obama can steal this one too, for his house. Also, we’re […]

A bunch of you have sent us a link to this painting by a fellow named Jon McNaughton, depicting the divine event that took place during the hot Philadelphia summer of 1787, when Jeebus flew to America from his ice cave on Pluto to deliver the U.S. Constitution to some brat before an in-studio audience […]

The Connor Contemporary showcases the works of John Kirchner and Brandon Morse in a joint exhibit, “Unknowns” and “This Shape We’re In,” an exploration of decay and rebirth. Kirchner takes old oil paintings from unknown artists and adds commonplace things to them — an apple, a shirt — while Morse’s videos show structures breaking down […]

And it is a very nice work of art from Vladimir Putin, too! He painted a portrait of a beautiful, smiling woman, seen just to the right of that auction hall window in this photograph. [Telegraph]

A Wonkette Refuse Desposal Spy sends us this snap taken while biking through beautiful Lisbon, Iowa recently during the RAGBRAI, which is Iowan for “bicycle ride.” Bikers and volunteers were asked to vote for president by throwing stuff in the dumpster for the earnest young Egyptian man or the sinister one-eyed albino villain. The fellow […]