paintings
Greatest Living President Is Also Fantastic Painter
Haha, we tricked you! We stole the title of this post from the upstanding fellows at the Washington Free Beacon, who are fucking idiots. They are such fucking idiots that they think the paintings of the greatest living president (GEORGE W. BUSH OBVS) look like the work of Degas and Manet! No, they look like [...]
George W. Bush Is President of Paintings
And this is a painting of George W. Bush, as unveiled at a White House ceremony that just wrapped up. Look at ‘im. He’s like, “Boy howdy don’t I look good, hummina hummina.” And no, it wasn’t “awkward,” this ceremony. Some folks have suggested that the atmosphere might be uncomfortable since Barack Obama has been [...]
Birther Who Described Orly Taitz’s Sex Parts Sells Nude Painting of Her
In an effort to keep yourself from vomiting, you should probably close your eyes as you read this post. Birther Lucas Smith, who was last seen in an affidavit claiming Orly Taitz asked him to perjure himself and also recounting another birther guy’s claims about the narrowness and viscosity of her womanly passages when she [...]
U.S. Labor Dept. Wants Money It Gave Maine For Mural Torn Down By Teabagger Gov. Paul LePage
Remember that “labor-themed mural” in the Maine Department of Labor headquarters that wingnut teabagger Paul LePage ordered removed, because his administration hates Maine’s working families? The U.S. Department of Labor says Gov. Paul LePage violated the terms of a federal grant when he removed a labor-themed mural from a state office building last month. Now [...]
Woman Attacks National Gallery Gauguin Painting For Featuring Boobs
Screaming “This is evil,” a woman tried to pull Gauguin’s “Two Tahitian Women” from a gallery wall Friday and banged on the picture’s clear plastic covering, said Pamela Degotardi of New York, who was there. What was wrong with the painting? Was it the heaping melons? No, it was the three (3) total exposed boobs [...]
Buy Charlie Crist’s Official Painting, On The eBay
This is real, you guys! The Florida Republican Party, as part of its ongoing efforts to scrub any hint of association with pariah Charlie Crist — most of which just involves wiping all of those orange smears from the walls of their headquarters — is selling Crist’s official state portrait on eBay. It cost the [...]
‘Real American’ Records Actual Historical Event In Beautiful Painting
A bunch of you have sent us a link to this painting by a fellow named Jon McNaughton, depicting the divine event that took place during the hot Philadelphia summer of 1787, when Jeebus flew to America from his ice cave on Pluto to deliver the U.S. Constitution to some brat before an in-studio audience [...]
Three Trippy Exhibits and New Orleans Cocktails
The Connor Contemporary showcases the works of John Kirchner and Brandon Morse in a joint exhibit, “Unknowns” and “This Shape We’re In,” an exploration of decay and rebirth. Kirchner takes old oil paintings from unknown artists and adds commonplace things to them — an apple, a shirt — while Morse’s videos show structures breaking down [...]
Putin’s Painting Sells For $1.15 Million
And it is a very nice work of art from Vladimir Putin, too! He painted a portrait of a beautiful, smiling woman, seen just to the right of that auction hall window in this photograph. [Telegraph]
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‘The Jesus Painting Yesterday’ Produces Obama Campaign-esque Artistic Revival
by Jim Newell
Well how about this! Jacksonville artist David Durrett sends this “real painting” (super-sized) to your Wonkette and writes, “I love Wonkette, and was inspired to do an acrylic response to the Jesus painting yesterday! Hope you like it!!” Yes it is very nice! Maybe Obama can steal this one too, for his house. Also, we’re [...]