Tag Archives: oprah

  how the fuck is babby formed again?

Looks Like God Knocked Up Bristol Palin Again

They're laughing with me, right Mama?
Oh my stars, it seems America’s most virginal born-again virgin is with child. Again: I wanted you guys to be the first to know that I am pregnant. Honestly, I’ve been trying my hardest to keep my chin up on this one. Read more on Looks Like God Knocked Up Bristol Palin Again…
  clipbait

Here Is Hillary Clinton Being Pretty Funny On Colbert (Video)

Do you hate Hillary Clinton? We do sometimes, like for instance for most of the 18 years since her husband signed the Welfare Reform Act. But then she showed up for her first hello at State and the career diplomats cheered for diplomacy and the absence of Condi Rice, and we cried, because we are a girl. Read more on Here Is Hillary Clinton Being Pretty Funny On Colbert (Video)…
  A Racist Says What?

Donald Sterling Continues To Bloviate; Sky Is Still Blue

Donald Sterling ain’t never gonna stop being Donald Sterling, even as those around him try to salvage the wreckage. Though his wife Shelley confirmed she has his authority to sell the Clippers, Sterling himself is still protesting the NBA’s fine by being as bullyish and scuzzy as ever. Read more on Donald Sterling Continues To Bloviate; Sky Is Still Blue…
  you ain't heard nothin yet

School Superintendent Is The Very Best At Racially, Sexually Slurring His Employees, Say Employees

Sometimes, we are grudgingly impressed by the lengths that stupid/awful people will go in terms of their behavior in the workplace. Take for example one Mr. Ronald O. Ross, superintendent of the Greenburgh School District in New York, who managed to call his employees “bitch” in a stunning variety of ways, according to a lawsuit filed by said employees. And listen, you may think you know how to use the word “bitch” to slur people you work with, but this dude has modifiers you haven’t even thought of yet. You guys we are totally putting the list after the jump because it contains so many racist ways of saying “bitch” that you do not want to be gazing at this thing accidentally when your (hopefully non-slur-filled) boss walks by. Read more on School Superintendent Is The Very Best At Racially, Sexually Slurring His Employees, Say Employees…
  Sellout Crowd

Here Is Your Not-At-All-Complete List Of People Who Will Buy The Clippers Out From Under Racist Donald Sterling

Now that Donald Sterling has been suspended 4LYFE from the NBA, everyone is lining up to say they’d buy the Clippers, which is probably what the NBA hoped. Force a sale and get this guy gone. Since Magic Johnson has denied reports that he’d consider buying the team, we’re forced to consider the other candidates, likely and otherwise. Read more on Here Is Your Not-At-All-Complete List Of People Who Will Buy The Clippers Out From Under Racist Donald Sterling…
  ode to joy

Oprah’s Ex-Stepmom Is Kind Of A Bitch, And Many Other Happy Nice Time Links!

So much happy! So little time! Sean Hannity SO MAD at Jon Stewart, SOOOO MAD! OPRAH’s ex-stepmom sounds like a real nice lady who calls her stepdaughter “ghetto,” laughs at her taste, calls her a lesbian, and then is : ( that Oprah won’t let her live in her mansion. Read more on Oprah’s Ex-Stepmom Is Kind Of A Bitch, And Many Other Happy Nice Time Links!…
  you get a racist! and you get a racist!

Zimmerman Bestie Shockingly Uses Racist Slurs On Oprah, Like WTF-Level Racist

George Zimmerman Fan Club President Frank Taaffe, HLN’s go-to source for commentary on the joys of killing black children armed self defense against thugs, sometimes is accused of racism. As open- and fair-minded lieburals, we are careful about throwing that sort of terminology around, because the TRUE danger to American society, the REAL racism, is…hang on a sec. This just in. Frank Taaffe called TV’s Oprah Winfrey that n-word. Repeatedly. OK, never mind, let’s strap into this shitbird. Read more on Zimmerman Bestie Shockingly Uses Racist Slurs On Oprah, Like WTF-Level Racist…
  you get a presidential medal of freedom and you ...

Loretta Lynn, Gloria Steinem, Some Other People Whatever, Getting The Presidential Medal Of Freedom

Loretta Lynn and Gloria Steinem are getting the Presidential Medal of Freedom today, along with some total nobodies like Bill Clinton, and some cool dead people like Sally Ride and Senator Daniel Inouye, who was amazing. Read more on Loretta Lynn, Gloria Steinem, Some Other People Whatever, Getting The Presidential Medal Of Freedom…
  no we will not make a where's the beef joke

When PETA And Cattle Ranchers Fight, Joan Jett And America Lose

For some reason we cannot discern, Joan Jett was supposed to ride atop South Dakota’s float in the upcoming Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, but then this made the cattle ranchers sad because of how Joan Jett does not love meat and only loves PETA. Read more on When PETA And Cattle Ranchers Fight, Joan Jett And America Lose…
  everybody's a critic

WaPo’s Jennifer Rubin: John Bolton Is Louis CK And George W. Bush Is Mother Teresa

What is it like to be inside Washington Post columnist Jennifer Rubin’s head? Swimming in that soup of confusion and anger all the time? Living with the pressure of pushing out 6, 7, 8 posts per day about just how everyone is wrong and you are right and Bamz is killing us all with healthcare? Say what you will about Rubin, she is not lazy. She is clocking her perpetual grievances and right-wing takeover fantasies on the regular. She’s a veritable workhorse of wrong, a Clydesdale of rage. We can’t even keep up with all her arglebargle, so we had to just pick a few things at random. How about the incredibly bright political future of John Bolton, or his presidential prospects in 2016? Oh hell yeah we’re gonna talk about that. What’s that you say? She wrote about how George W. is the biggest lifesaver of all time? FUCK YES. Read more on WaPo’s Jennifer Rubin: John Bolton Is Louis CK And George W. Bush Is Mother Teresa…
  flotus files

FLOTUS Visits Late Show, Things Get Real

Our beloved FLOTUS has been the subject of some “trouble” lately, but of course, that is one of the things we like about her. We also adore her style, charm, and biceps. That Michelle Obama charm was on full display last night, when our FLOTUS made an appearance on The Late Show with David Letterman. She talked about Bo the dog, her favorite place ever (Target), and, of course, The Troops. She laughed, and she even cried, and then asked in frustration, “Where are the laughs?” which was quite profound, as it is a question that America is struggling to answer. Read more on FLOTUS Visits Late Show, Things Get Real…
  joe scarborough is slitting his wrists right now

Anderson Cooper Gets Daytime Talk Show, Ladies

Anderson Cooper is keeping his job at CNN, at least until Larry King shows up at his studios with a gun and Cooper decides it’s no longer worth it to interview terror-baby activists and hilarious homophobe assistant attorneys general. But he is also getting a daytime talk show, because why not? You know how Anderson Cooper always gets that cringe face when he’s forced to talk about sensationalist celebrity pablum? That’s how it’s going to be for an hour every day, as he reads off Gawker posts about how totally gay he is to the audience and tries to keep the nation’s unemployed, retirees, and homemakers from killing themselves. Read more on Anderson Cooper Gets Daytime Talk Show, Ladies…
  girls' night

Obama Masticates With Oprah, Oprah’s Friend Gayle

President Obama did celebrate his birthday last night after all! In fact, he flew to Chicago, took a helicopter that landed on SOLDIER FIELD, and went to a restaurant with teevee lady Oprah Winfrey and her long-time companion-friend Gayle King. “Obama spent more than three hours inside,” probably receiving his orders from Oprah. Meanwhile, back in D.C., Robert Gibbs stared at the uneaten candlelight dinner he had prepared and at the empty chair across from him. Then he cried softly. Read more on Obama Masticates With Oprah, Oprah’s Friend Gayle…
  do it do it do it

Watch Oprah Brutally Interrogate Rielle Hunter On Teevee Today!

Did you TiVo this afternoon’s edition of The Oprah Winfrey Program? Well fuck you then. Her guest will be famed sex person Rielle Hunter, who is pretty hilarious. But yeah, still not worth it. Instead, you should enjoy this ominous Official Oprah Trailer of the interview, where Oprah just yells things at Hunter for a while. And then there is some strange PSA about playing with telephones in cars, the end. [YouTube] Read more on Watch Oprah Brutally Interrogate Rielle Hunter On Teevee Today!…
  daily briefing

Oprah Is Canceling ‘Oprah’!; Congress THISCLOSE To Asking Oprah To Cancel Barack Obama!

New controversial medical study ensures that cervical cancer will be the breast cancer of next week. One more’s a trendpiece! [New York Times] Members of Congress were very busy and shouty last night in trying to decide who they hated more: Obama or Geithner… [Washington Post] Read more on Oprah Is Canceling ‘Oprah’!; Congress THISCLOSE To Asking Oprah To Cancel Barack Obama!…
  kill us

Liveblogging Sarah Palin On Oprah

Anyone else feel sick to your stomach? We’re going to get this over with, and then blow up the blog. [UPDATE: It’s over! The liveblog is completely incoherent, as usual. Pareene also liveblogged it at Gawker. We both quoted Andrew Sullivan at 4:39!] Read more on Liveblogging Sarah Palin On Oprah…