operatives

It’s an operative-heavy day at your Wonkette! This latest embarrassment to America comes from fancy car-owning operative “Scott,” in Las Vegas. What does this mean?

Wonkette zombie sex operative “Karen N.” of Iowa City, Iowa, sends us this filthy picture she took yesterday — “Sorry for sending you this eye candy a little late. We were drinking.” — during Obama’s “We passed health care but here’s a rally anyway” thing. This fellow wants to know what Obama did with his […]

Wonkette trash-eating operative “Jeff” sends this curious lunch-break picture and writes, “It’s a $25,000 check from General Mills to the Congressional Hispanic Caucus Institute sitting [outside] a garbage can on 17th and K Streets.” This “Jeff” STUPIDLY did not take it, so it may be still there! Just take it to the bank and they’ll […]

This brings back old memories, doesn’t it, from the era when American reality was even barely tethered to Planet Earth: hollow, cranky, lame-duck Sen. Jim Bunning, out of age-related bitterness, allows vital social services to expire and thousands of workers to take multi-day furloughs in the middle of a Great Depression, and people get upset […]

Paultards dress up as Janet Napolitano, at CPAC! She is “Big Sis” because she runs the catch-all bureaucracy no one has ever given a shit about and which has no power, or resources. In other words: “Sumo” would be apt, because she may be fat, maybe. [Photo via Garrett Quinn]

Look, a local human was walking by the Russell office building parking lot just yesterday and OH SHIT IT’S SCOTT BROWN’S TRUCK, where he banged Simon Cowell and won the presidency of Massachusetts by beating J. F. Kennedy 100-0 in the snow. He still drives this truck to his new job! Five more authenticity points […]

Wonkette waiting room reading material operative “Chris C.” sends this picture of some Sarah Palin magazine he saw, right above the latest Scott Brown (?) nudie mag, at “a real grocery store, in God-Hating Penisville, aka nyc’s Greenwich Village.” The simplistic cover suggests that it’s a version of Going Rogue for third-graders. Oh wait, a […]

POLLING PIXXX  10:51 am January 19, 2010

by Jim Newell

SEND SEXY ELECTION DAY PICS TO YOUR WONKETTE, YOU “MASSHOLES”: Considering how gay and Maoist you people are, a sizable chunk of you probably live in Massachusetts, the site of today’s exciting political election between a poorly programmed Democratic robot and the naked person. What a great opportunity to help your Wonkette! If you are […]

Check out this crusty old bit of sex-on-wheels, sent from a Wonkette Arkansas operative: “Here is a photo, from today, of Arkansas State Senator Kim Hendren’s car parked in his reserved slot at the state capitol. He is the front runner in the Republican primary to challenge Blanche Lincoln. He’s the one who called Chuck […]

Wonkette operative “Rob J.” sends us this pic of a Real American he saw at L’Enfant Plaza today, making some point about the Blacks and their long history of enslaving others. What a horrible misspelling of that one country’s name! There are two g’s, idiot.

Wonkette “The View From Your Window” operative “UFgatorzfan4life” sends us this PG-13 erotica telephone picture of pedophile Mark Foley and writes, “Here is your favorite disgraced Congressman from Palm Beach County. He’s hanging out at Starbucks..texting..riding his bike with his shirt unzipped. You know, normal disgraced Congressman activities. I see him about once a month […]

Fast-track that resolution, Boner! A Hill operative sends us this photo and writes, “The War on Christmas is alive and well in the House of Representatives. This Christmas tree was seen discarded on the 2nd floor of the Longworth House Office Building.” Oh that’s no Christmas tree, just an aborted tree fetus. But why is […]

A Wonkette airport ATM-monitoring operative ran into profound Sen. David Vitter last night at Reagan National, and they even shared a flight! HE SHOULD BE READING THE BILL THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS. Not only did he withdraw cash from an ATM — he probably changed his mind in the heat of the moment and did want […]

Now that the House is debating the Republican health care alternative, the sweeping “BonerCare” of ancient lore, it’s a good opportunity to share this amazing (and ominous — mostly ominous!) photograph from commenter “mollymcguire,” who actually lives in the Northern Marianas, as a sex slave who is currently getting railed by Tom DeLay or whatever […]

Wonkette motorist operative “Marcus” sent us this telephone picture of the rather uncouth car he was stuck behind yesterday, during the Super Bowl of Retardation. This fellow hates Obama so much that he — and we’re presuming “he,” because how unladylike! — chose to attach a massive cut-out of a donkey shitting Obama’s head on […]