Wonkette

With the West Coast polls closed and Obama already holding 220, including Virginia … well, you can count, even if you’re very wasted right now. California has 55 electoral votes, Washington state has 11, Hawaii has 4, and Oregon has 7. You can add that to 220 electoral votes CNN says he has right now. We have a new president. His name is Barack Obama.

Here is more of Tim Russo’s scary movie about the GOP’s shrinking base: angry unemployed white people who gather in small groups to chant weird things about the opposition candidate, because he’s black. MORE »

This is phenomenal stuff, courtesy of Blogger Interrupted. It’s the 2008 version of the classic Heavy Metal Parking Lot! But at least those headbanger kids were just having fun or whatever — it’s not like any of them were registered to vote. [Blogger Interrupted]

We told you how John McCain offered up his “old lady” to the biker mob at Sturgis, and then we showed you the awkward video, but now we must present this version, which begins with the incredible confession from McCain that he’s only allowed onstage as a warm-up midget for Kid Rock. MORE »

This is one of those troubling images that’s been appearing here and there on the Internets for many years … the same many years, in fact, when John McCain was not running for president, in the early 1990s. Our forensic-photography expert Jim Newell obscured Dennis Hastert’s the anonymous partner’s face in this version, so we can concentrate on the Pressing Issue: Is John McCain now or has he ever been a Furry? MORE »

We are really going to miss these people when they’re gone — are they gone yet? The Ron Paul Sensation was such a revealing look at a part of America we never knew existed, because we have jobs and really only read The Hobbit in grade school, and it left us feeling weird, especially when the creepy fat adult with the neckbeard and the Birkenstocks invited a bunch of us 12-year-old boys over to play Dungeons & Dragons at his apartment behind the mall. We just figured we could skip that particular invitation and then we’d never see those people again. How wonderfully wrong we were ….

Sure, the candidates talk a lot about the economy, and Iraq, and wanting to help people with their lives. But who will stop these terrible murderers plaguing, in particular, Allentown? Also, when will John McCain nominate this guy as Secretary of Defense? [Allentown Morning Call]

• Hegel, Hölderlin and Schelling were roommates in college. [Crooked Timber]
• E.J. Dionne is not intriguing. [Captain's Quarters]
• Let’s face it, you do feel safer, and I love you more today than yesterday. [Blogs for Bush]
• “Single straight white people seek same” [Sadly , No]

We take back every single negative thing we have ever said about a) blogs b) CBS c) TV news d) humanity in general. Because of this new feature at the CBS “PublicEye” site. It is called “What Was Andy Thinking?” and it is a list of things talked about by Andy Rooney every week on 60 Minutes. Here is but a sampling: MORE »

Ok, we have to stop and breathe. Because this is… just, wow. MORE »