December 6, 2013
The whole debate, in a minute! That’s as much time as anybody should really have to spend thinking about the latest Republican Dimbulb Derby, which was broadcast on Saturday night to an audience of people who were unable to find the remote. At least everybody piled on the fat crying amoral jewelry-debt baby Newt Gingrich, [...]
Pepper spray was a-spraying, knives were a-stabbing, guns were a-shooting, muggers were a-mugging, punchers were a-punching — it was a “Black Friday” celebration that truly proved if you’re not a part of the worldwide anti-corporate protests, then you’re actually a very stinky part of the problem. But the Gold Medal in Applied Assjerk Consumerism goes [...]
OMG you guys, Mitt Romney has a Flickr account. It is incredible. Here’s one of the very first pictures that “caught our eye,” oh lord. Mitt Romney, everyone! He has a Flickr, just like that Barack Obama did, back in 2008.
A frightened Wonkette operative sends this picture. Wha-a-a-a-t is this supposed to mean, exactly? We are just going to post it and go away and never think about it again — not the shirt, not the person wearing it, not anything. We are just going to go smoke some marijuana, actually. It’s the only thing [...]
Let’s just “make sure we’re talking about the same thing,” because, well, we aren’t, now are we?
Faced with endless photographic documentation of the insane violence of 500 riot cops against a group of protesters in Oakland, the Washington Post editors proved they are good Kaplan 1% corporate lackeys and choose this picture of … a riot cop petting a kitten. Not just any kitten, though. According to the Washington Post, the [...]
We thought Giant Whining Baby/Serial Divorcer Newt Gingrich had his half-million-dollar Tiffany’s credit line just because he always needs new engagement rings when he divorces his old, cancer-ridden wives for new, younger ladies he’s been schtupping for several years. But no, it’s actually sleazier than all that, because this is Newt Gingrich we’re talking about. [...]
Dugway Proving Ground, a massive Army base in Utah along the border with Nevada, has been under lockdown for many hours now because of some kind of “national terror alert” to “resolve security issues.” Dugway is a bioweapons lab and supposedly home to secret military aerial projects. More than 6,300 sheep died near the proving [...]
Which pea-brained clown will become the new chairperson of the Republican National Committee? Whether it’s the dingbat woman dreaming of getting wasted at her kitchen table again or the lunkhead who just keeps barking “Reagan! Reagan!” when asked if he has ever read a book, all five of these mouth-breathing imbeciles are perfect representatives of [...]
The journalism industry is having a bit of a hard time these last couple of decades, you may have heard. And the main way the journalism industry has responded to the crisis in the journalism industry is by dramatically lowering the quality of the journalism industry’s primary product, which is journalism. Here, in a brilliant [...]
That guy who sees Dead Presidents whenever the veins in his forehead reach double the “safe size,” Rick Barber? He’s got a new insane campaign commercial. This time, he argues with his ever-present special friend hallucination (the ghost of George Washington) about all the bloggers making fun of Rick Barber being an idiot — you’ll [...]
This is so great, so inspiring. In fact, we’re going into the studio today with Thievery Corporation and Kermit the Frog, who will stay up all night snorting Adderall and reading YouTube comments about FEMA death camps over a chill kind of trip-hop thing. And for the end? Let’s computer animate a motherfucking robot horse! [...]
Always with the fake British accents and the Guy Fawkes masks, the Paultards are. But there is a Reason why Tea Party Baggers are putting new embarrassing home videos on the YouTubes: The Man is trying to find The Leader of the Teabaggers, so as to imprison this Brave Knight in a Darke Tower of [...]
Teabagger Final Fantasy? The “Once More, With Feeling” episode of John Adams nobody noticed at the time, due to not watching it? We have no idea, but if Naked Scott Brown is not tarred and feathered and videotaped being dropped into the snow by noon today, REVOLUTION, babies. [YouTube via Metafilter via Satan]
Did you know it’s impossible to spell “Funny Pictures” without the name “Katherine Harris” … as part of the caption from one of the many photographs of Katherine Harris that your Wonkette has posted under the “Funny Pictures” tags, over the years? Well, then welcome to the “Virtual Reality Based Community” or whatever it was [...]