olympics
Liveblogging Tampa Wednesday: Rand Paul Ryan Rubio Olympians?
I would like to welcome you all to my first ever Wonkette liveblog of anything ever except for those three years that I was secretly running the entire site but pretending I was white people! ARE YOU READY TO HEAR PEOPLE REFERENCE BUILDING THAT OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN??? I’m sure you are. Tonight, [...]
Turk Says Olympics Turning Ladies To Men, Freepers Torn Between Anti-Feminism And Anti-Turkishness
It is a tradition as old as the Olympics itself: Some idiot notices that muscular women and muscular men, being actual members of the same actual species, look somewhat similar to each other, and declares that sports have brought about the “death of femininity.” The misogynist du jour is Turkish columnist Yüksel Aytuğ, who kicked [...]
Rafalca’s Magical Olympics, Day One: Rafalca Losing To Some Dancing Horses, Beating Others
Your Wonkette knows that it is not allowed to make any lighthearted jokes about the rich presidential candidate and his wife who own a dancing horse that is competing in the Olympics. Americans have no history of making jokes about the playthings of the rich, in this case a German-bred mare. As Mitt Romney says, [...]
The Proper Conservative Patriot’s Take On The Olympic Opening Ceremonies
Poor Jennifer Rubin, the unofficial public voice of the Romney campaign who continues to have a job at the Washington Post. Why doesn’t your Wonkette make fun of her more often? Maybe it’s too easy, but it’s not like that consideration has ever stopped us. Jen Rubin is sad today. Just a few days ago [...]
American Person Travels To London For Olympic Games, Doesn’t Embarrass Entire Nation
Now that poor Mitt Romney has been called out for his “rude and graceless” remarks by none other than Carl Lewis — perhaps the greatest Olympian, who said of him in disgust, “some Americans just shouldn’t leave the country” — maybe his very bad news cycle is almost over. Has he said anything else awful? [...]
How Else Has Mitt Romney Insulted Jolly Olde Englande?
Mitt Romney is trying to prove his foreign policy chops are so much better than stupid hapless old Obama’s, and so he and his advisors are barnstorming across London, whinging about the threat from the Soviet Union. But His Lord High Hairgel has not had the easiest of receptions, as every person in that small [...]
Why Won’t Mitt Romney Root For His Wife’s Dumb Horse?
Mitt Romney has taken a look at how they do things over there in old England-Land, and has quickly come to the well-justified conclusion that their Olympics are just a hot metric tonne of garbage compared to the awesome USA American Olympics he ran in Salt Lake City. But you’d think that he’d at least [...]
Mitt Romney Now Losing Friends And Alienating People In Olde Anglo-Saxon-Lande Too
Oh Mitt Romney, please stop making us feel sorry for you. You go to Yurp so you can be a Celebrity Rock Star like Obama was in 2008, and “project leadership,” and everywhere you go, you make people hate you. What jerk thing came out of your mouth this time? Oh, just that London was [...]
New Obama Super PAC Ad Crosses the Line by Making Fun of Mitt Romney
The amoral scumbuckets who run the Obama campaign and Completely Unaffiliated Priorities USA Super PAC have really done it this time: they mock Mitt Romney’s history of saving the Olympics, a lil’ sidegig of his from back when he was still Bain Capital CEO, president, chairman, and sole stockowner. Have you ever saved an Olympics, [...]
Fox & Friends Has All Sorts of Problems With These Olympic Team Berets
The thought-free muppets who host Fox News’ illiterate dementia variety hour Fox and Friends briefly mentioned the actual news nugget about the unveiled U.S. Olympic Team outfits today — they’re made in China, har har — but spent considerably more time examining the team’s hat wear: berets. Like all the fruity poets and mimes in [...]
It Is Official, Mitt Romney Is Christopher Walken From ‘The Wedding Crashers’
Good morning, Washington Post! What do you have for us this morning? Oh, three Internet pages on Mitt Romney’s family outings to Lake Winnipesaukee? (As Ann Romney noted, while calling Moochelle NoOBaMa an uppity bitch, they “have [their] own places” for summering.) And your reporter cannot even contain his terrible reporterly rage? Cool, let us [...]
Maybe Dan Brown Had A Point
Today, we find out how many gay people there are while the Vatican works miracles in book selling (not that book!), and a new sport everyone can do but a new reality show almost no can join. Hmmm…. How many gay people are there, really, in the United States? Luckily, the answer’s actually pretty easy: [...]
The Snow Makes Everything Cheaper
Olympics: The Winter Olympics are in full force, but no one seems to appreciate ever since that nice Georgian Luger died, in a sport. If you feel some patriotic desire (be it for America or Georgia) to watch the games, head to Asia Nine where any of the lounge’s bar snacks are only a buck [...]
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