Tag: Oklahoma

Attorney General Loretta Lynch ‘Bout To Have To Smack A Bunch More States Upside Their Heads

Oh look, a whole posse of bigot states are joining together to say 'EW TRANS PEOPLE'!
You're cool with this now, right?

Mary Fallin Personally Aborts All The Little Children In Oklahoma, Will Never Be Trump’s Veep Now :(

Oklahoma Gov. Mary Fallin is obviously on Jan Brewer's meds, as she very sanely vetoes an abortion ban just because it's 'unconstitutional.'
The monument is 6 feet high, so that man and buggy must be HUGE

Aw Look, Oklahoma Is Impeaching President Obama. How Adorable!

Surprise, they're freaked out about trans people going potty!

Iowa Rep. Steve King Worried Transgenders Will Make Ladies’ Armpits All Gross And Sweaty

He can smell what's coming, and PEE YEW!
Science FacIt might be upheld. This is no time for a de-fetus attitude.t: At 20 weeks a fetus in Texas can shut women's rights down

Oklahoma Lege Passes Bill Banning Abor … Wait, Abortion Was Still Legal In Oklahoma?

Oklahoma legislators have passed and sent a complete ban on abortion to Gov. Mary Fallin, because why keep testing the limits of Planned Parenthood v. Casey when you can try to overturn Roe v. Wade all at once?

Oklahoma Court Just Fine With Oral Rape, As Long As Victim’s Really, Really Drunk

In a novel bit of legal reasoning, an Oklahoma state appeals court has decided that under Oklahoma law, oral sex with a person who's completely unconscious isn't actually a crime. They're not unsympathetic to victims, no, not at...

Extremely Disturbed Time Traveler Walks Fourth Dimension To Seek Out Arby’s ‘Food’

We've never gotten to use "time travel" and "Arby's" in a headline before. We feel good about it. Dante Anderson of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, was a man on a mission -- specifically, a mission through the twisting pathways of space...

Alabama Legislators Cleverly Devise Foolproof Plan To Ban All The Abortions

State legislators in Alabama have a dream. A beautiful dream to ban all the abortion in their state! For today they vote on whether or not to put a referendum on the state ballot which will allow voters to...

Tales Of Restaurant Employees Who Failed Spectacularly

Welcome back to Off The Menu, where we bring you the best and strangest food stories from my email inbox. This week, we’ve got more stories of restaurant employees whose crap was just in no way together. As always,...
Just being a good Christian

Ted Cruz Wishes Child Sex Slaves Would Think Of The Unborn Babies

<a href="http://wonkette.com/597828/everybody-hates-ted-cruz-and-his-stupid-foreign-born-face"></a>It's easy to forget, what with all the breaking news about Ted Cruz's alleged sex scandals and dildo-grabbing, that the man currently running second place for the Republican presidential nomination actually has a day job, as the most...

Oh Look, Oklahoma Being Effing Awful Again

We usually skip Oklahoma when listing Worst Goddang States In The U.S. of Us. Maybe it's because we primarily associate it with an old-timey musical and forget it is an actual place where people live and work and don't just sing songs...
Could you please go be poor somewhere else? KTHXBAI

Make Less Than $9500 Per Year? Oklahoma Will Help You By Axing Your Medicaid

Republicans in Oklahoma's House of Representatives are apparently sick and tired of Florida and Maine being the shittiest to their poor people. So by an overwhelming majority, the Oklahoma House voted last week to kick 111,000 single parents off...

Republican Candidates Trying To Fill Ben Carson-Shaped Hole In Their Hearts

Uh oh, it's a day in 2016, which means it's time for the remaining GOP candidates to come together for spiteful purposes, infecting our television sets and Commodore 64 computers with bile and derp. Yes, we mean like in...

Oh Yeah, Ted Cruz’s Dumb Face Won Some States Too

In all of the Super Tuesday sexcitement of celebrating Women's History (Making) Month, with our vaginas, and all of our laughing so hard at Republicans for making Donald Trump happen, we almost forgot to rag on Ted Cruz. Shame...

Marco Rubio Wins A State, Still Second-Place Champion Of Our Hearts

Aww, serial state-loser Marco Rubio finally won a place! We wonder, though, if this means he'll have to bow out of his run for Second-Place President of the United States of America? Aww, poor Marco; no matter what he...

It’s A Bernie V. Hillary Knock-Down Drag-Out Fight! (At My Mama’s House, Starring Us)

It had been a very good day. We went to the corner of Beard and Farrall in Shawnee, Oklahoma, and held signs that read Bernie (my mom, husband, and daughter) or Yellow Dog Democrat (me)! Most people waved back...