oh for fuck’s sake

Hello Wonkeratti! It’s time once again to expand your brains with Science, congest them with the lifeblood of learning and, finally, make them Turgid with Knowledge. Yes, it’s time once again to disrupt the normal flow of Wonkette’s daily Festival of Perfect Snark and Rudeness with these disturbing and bizarre Sci-Blog links. There seems to […]

Hi there, Wonkeratti! We Interrupt your Normal Programing for another weekly excursion into - Science! It’s highly likely that Your Estimable Editrix will see the error of her ways fairly soon and we will return to your Regularly Scheduled Rude Snark, Wife Beating, Troll Harpooning and Diplomacy. Please stand by. So, what is it that you all know […]

In any political operation, there’s this thing called “message discipline.” Not only does it mean staying on the talking points (“It’s the Economy, stupid!”), but of course it also means Don’t hand your opponent a gift by saying something so incredibly stupid and offensive that it lends itself to a headline like “Liberal Super PAC […]

Hi there, Wonketteers! I’m Proud to be able to bring to you a New Wonkette Feature: a weekly round-up of Current Events in – SCIENCE! Your Esteemed Editrix, Rebecca Schoenkopf, has pulled Yours Truly away from furiously carpet-bombing Wonkville with bizarre and disgusting Science Related Stories and given me the opportunity to do the same […]

Can the Wasilla Grifter possibly get another five minutes added to her expired fifteen minutes of infamy? Well, yes, of course. Besides, her fifteen minutes actually turned out to be three-and-a-half years, which is pretty substantial for an aging snowbilly grandma whose one and only talent was being less physically repulsive than John McCain, back […]

The natural conclusion to MSNBC’s long effort to win the Pulitzer in Applied Stupidity was reached today when the cable-talk station hired vapid airhead Meghan McCain as some type of on-air personality. “We were looking for someone who literally knows nothing about anything, MSNBC vice president of programming Koko the Klown said in pantomime, while […]

Oh look, one of those basic cable reality-teevee families is getting another reality show. And we are posting it, because that is apparently what we do here, which is yet another reason why we are all washing our hands of this daily deluge of mental sewage and walking away, with a smile of relief on […]

Christmas Eve is a very exciting travel day because it’s one of the busiest, most insane times to attempt to get on a plane. Plus, the weather is guaranteed to be pretty horrible because it’s winter. Also, there’s horrific stress as millions of people try to get across the country at the last possible minute […]

Sometimes, things are just so weird that you’ve got no real choice but to spray paint a bunch of angry anti-Mexican crap all over your crappy car, for America!

Because the world’s most powerful military is being destroyed by a combination of a) goat herders in Afghanistan and b) some weird guy with a website, the Pentagon has just banned any kind of little gizmo that can save information off a computer. (It is apparently impossible to ban goat herders … yet.) As of […]

Eric Cantor is very upset about Democrats being upset about Teabagger-Republicans attacking the homes and offices of Democratic politicians. So, you Democrats stop complaining about that stuff. Just take it, like …. uhh, like Eric Cantor.

So, uh … here we are! One decade deep into the 21st Century. This is what it’s like, apparently. Jesus. Well … guess we’ll go on back to bed now. Thank you, Daniel McQuade, for taking this picture of this Real True Calendar while Xmas Shopping for your Mom.

WONK-O-TWIT  2:44 am December 30, 2009

by Ken Layne

THIS IS IT: A direct post to the Twitter, from the Wonkette, in 140 paragraphs or less? It’s so 2010! Oh wait it doesn’t work GODDAMMIT.

WOW. So this lady, “Bunny,” is so furious that, uhm, the Senate would pass Health Care Reform on, uhm, a working day/weekday before Christmas, that she just has no idea what to do at all, beyond call C-SPAN. So she took down her Christmas tree, and the wreath, because these are pagan symbols from the […]

By weirdly popular demand, here is the infamous video of some Paultards singing a very terrible version of “Twelve Days of Christmas,” wherein the partridge “goes Galt” and the Maidens all run away screaming because, jesus, Paultards are singing! [YouTube]