Tag: Off the Menu

Let’s Talk About Salon’s Flaming, Half-Masticated Dick Some More. Your Weekly Top Ten!

OH HEY WONKERS, WHAT IS SHAKING? We are fine, thank you for asking. So, it's Saturday and that means it's time for your weekly Top Ten list, which is all the stories YOU LOVED THE MOSTEST! Maybe you have read them...

Bundy Boys Or Bristol Palin, Who Is The Dumbest? Your Weekly Top Ten

OH HEY WONKERS, WHAT IS SHAKING? We are fine, thank you for asking. So, it's Saturday and that means it's time for your weekly Top Ten list, which is full of all the bestest stories you clicked on the mostest,...

Stories Of Truly Fantastic Restaurant Bosses

Welcome back to Off The Menu, where we bring you the best and strangest food stories from my email inbox. For our last Wonkette Off The Menu, we bring you stories of fantastic restaurant managers and where to find...

Wonkette Is World Famous In Iceland! Your Weekly Top Ten

OH HEY WONKERS HI HOW ARE YOU LOL! Ahem, so it is time for your weekly Top 10 list, and Wonkette's sexxxy exploits with the major (or even mayor) of Reykjavik are not the top story, but it's important that...

Hey, Maybe Don’t Tell Gay Servers You Hope They Get Stoned (At Least Not With Rocks)

Haven't gotten enough Worst Customer stories in Off The Menu lately? We've got another one for you today. A server at Zada Jane's in Charlotte, North Carolina says an extremely standoffish table not only didn't leave her a tip, they...

Tales Of Restaurant Employees Who Failed Spectacularly

Welcome back to Off The Menu, where we bring you the best and strangest food stories from my email inbox. This week, we’ve got more stories of restaurant employees whose crap was just in no way together. As always,...
Borned stupid.

Ted Cruz’s Dildos Squeezed Their Way Into Your Weekly Top Ten

What up, our Wonkette bros and lady-bros, are you ready to get a Top Ten list crammed at your face? GOOD. We had some weird news this week, about Ted Cruz's Dildo Issues. And also some other things too!...

Maybe Don’t Joke About Customers Getting Diabetes, Starbucks Baristas

Oh good, just in time for another edition of What Not To Do If You're A Food Service Employee. An unnamed customer in St. Augustine, Florida, just wanted a white chocolate mocha, which we can understand, as we ourselves suffer...
Feed the baby the soups!

Ruby Tuesday SO Hot Right Now, Apparently! Your Weekly Top Ten

<a href="http://wonkette.com/599553/worlds-sexiest-north-american-leaders-break-entire-internet-with-sexiness"></a>Oh look, it is an old picture of Wonkette Baby Donna Rose eating soup, like a lady! Why are we showing you this old picture? Because it's cute, OBVIOUSLY, and also Wonkette WENT VIRAL AGAIN, just like we...

This Week In WTF Restaurant Stories. Seriously?!

Welcome back to Off The Menu, where we bring you the best and strangest food stories from my email inbox. This week, we bring you some of the most spectacularly insane restaurant stories we've ever heard. As always, these...
NOPE!

Ted Cruz’s Allegedly Excellent Penis Adventures, Ew Gross. Your Weekly Top Ten.

Oh hey, WANKERS. It's time for your Saturday morning cocktail hour top ten list! And ugh, yeah, we sure did learn way more about what Ted Cruz's penis may or may not have done this week, and those stories...

Stories Of Staggeringly Dumb Restaurant Customers, Part 2

Welcome back to Off The Menu, where we bring you the best and strangest food stories from my email inbox. This week, we've got a special bonus week of more Dumb Customer stories, because WOW do I have a...

Elizabeth Warren Castrates Trump, David Brooks Still Sucks. It’s Your Weekly Top Ten!

Oh hey, Wonkettigentsia, what are you doing? Hmmmm, OK not sure we're interested in hearing about how sexy it is to collect stamps and magnets with your cats, so we'll just pretend you didn't understand that for the rhetorical...

Stories Of Staggeringly Dumb Restaurant Customers

Welcome back to Off The Menu, where we bring you the best and strangest food stories from my email inbox. This week, we've got week one of two of an old favorite: customers who were dumb it makes our...

You Want More Justin Trudeau Hotness? Fine. Your Weekly Top Ten.

Y'ALL. It's Saturday! You're probably like "Gah Evan, why do we have to look upon the hotness of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau again THIS SUCKS." That's because you're bad at life. But we can explain. First of all,...

Tennessee State Reps Will Stiff You On Tips And Be Asshats About It

We're used to crappy tipping stories (obviously, considering we publish Off The Menu every week) and subsequent online tip-shaming fiascos. This, however, is the first time we can remember where politicians -- people who theoretically know their every public...