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Posts Tagged ‘obamas’

SMOKE BREAK AT THE SWING SET

Work-at-Home Obama Just Goofing Off With His Kids All Day

Thursday, June 25th, 2009

J'ai perdu femme et enfants.
While Republican dads dump their unwanted wives and unloved children at a vacation home somewhere and then fly to Argentina on the taxpayer’s dime to tearfully commit adultery for years, Democratic wonder-dad Barack Obama continues to outrage the family-hating wingnut blogosphere by keeping various “promises” made to his “happy” children, such as “I’ll get you a hypoallergenic dog carefully bred by Portuguese robot-monks” and “I’ll build you the fanciest backyard swing set ever, and it won’t look anything like those tacky day-glo molded plastic travesties most kids are stuck with, if they’re lucky enough to have a playset at all.” [White House Flickr]


BREAKING NEWS

The Obamas Are About To Get Their Dog, In Spring, Pretty Soon!

Wednesday, February 25th, 2009

Please don't drink out of the motherfucking toilet bowl.Now this is some change we can believe in: Barack Obama kept his promise to three Americans (his wife and daughters) and now the family has a dog (Bobby Jindal). Ha, just kidding, they wanted a good dog. And they haven’t actually picked out a canine, yet. It’s all in People magazine, which is the main periodical covering the Obama Administration, because Americans love People, and when’s the last time you saw the NYT in the checkout line? MORE »


INDIGNANTS

George Bush Won’t Let Obama Into White House Early, Because WTF?

Friday, December 12th, 2008

The tacky “new money” Obama family has insulted America by requesting early occupancy of the White House’s guest quarters, Blair House, so that his two children could start school on time (Jan. 5) at their fancy private gig. The White House has turned down the request because who are these fucking people? MORE »