Glenn Beck’s wingnut bitch, Doug Hoffman, the Conservative Party’s losing candidate in the NY-23 special election several weeks ago (remember that whole thing??), is so clueless about his current station in life that he has “unconceded” defeat to Democrat Bill Owens, who was sworn into the House on November 6 — just in time for a health care vote! He was losing by 5,000 until some late ballots were counted a few days ago, which brought the margin down to about 3,000. And yeah, sure, maybe Al Gore famously unconceded to George Bush Junior in 2000, BUT LIKE AN HOUR AFTER CONCEDING, JESUS. About 10,000 absentee ballots remain, and Hoffman has like a 0.2% chance of winning. It was Glenn Beck who ordered him to unconcede, which makes sense, because Doug Hoffman is Glenn Beck’s wingnut bitch. [The Hill]

Glenn Beck’s wingnut bitch is still, shockingly, losing in the famous NY-23 race — and this after a real-life campaign appearance from Fred Thompson and his trophy wife! Ha ha ha it is 49% to 46%, Owens over Hoffman, with 78% or so of precincts reporting. MORE »

We all know that the ACORN organization — which has nothing better to do — is actively trying to steal the NY-23 special election from God’s candidate, Doug Hoffman, and give it to a randomly selected black aborted fetus on welfare, so it should come as no surprise that certain “local Democratic officials” (ACORN thugs) are calling the cops on Hoffman supporters outside polling locations for all sorts of ginned-up charges, as part of its ACORN Fear Campaign. MORE »

There is one thing standing between NY-23 “Conservative Party candidate” Doug Hoffman and his rightful election: the ACORN. Hoffman’s supporters know that ACORN — a non-profit that focuses on such things as low-income housing — is working behind the scenes with Obama and his friends, the Africans, to procure a stolen victory for the liberal Democrat candidate, Bill “Al Sharpton” Owens. MORE »

• SCUZZLEBUTT QUITS NY-23 RACE! The communist liberal abortion-loving ACORN Stalinist (”moderate conservative”) Republican candidate in the NY-23 special congressional election, Scuzzlebutt, has dropped out only a few days before the election. She was sick of getting yelled at by wingnuts. More likely, though, is that the RNC applied severe pressure on her (”Just get your quit on, baby”) so it could claim a Conservative Party victory as its own. The possibilities for bipartisanship in Congress have never been better. [AP]

Oh man, this would piss the wingnuts off so much, and we wouldn’t blame them. Michael Steele, the animated .gif in charge of the Republican party, sees that his moderate conservative (communist) Republican candidate in the NY-23 special election, Scuzzlebutt, is losing by billions of percentage points to both the Democratic candidate and the “Conservative Party” dude to whom all the big-name wingnuts have been defecting. Time to call the POLITICO and hedge! “Steele argued during an interview with POLITICO that the GOP doesn’t need to worry about Scozzafava’s lagging ratings because Hoffman is essentially a Republican.” S’all good, baby. And yet, poor Scuzzlebutt! [Good Politico]

It’s such fun to watch the wingnuts as they try to wrap their collective mind around the concept of a “moderate Republican” candidate, that endangered species of ancient lore, emerging from the Snowy North. They quickly spurned this GOP candidate, Dede Scozzafava — who from now on shall be referred to as “Scuzzlebutt,” because we’re sick of constantly having to look up the spelling of her last name — in the NY-23 special election in favor of some “neighbor” candidate for the Conservative Party, and their theses of hatred for Scuzzlebutt continue to mount. MORE »

Have we even posted about the comical NY-23 special congressional election yet? Don’t think so! Fortunately lazy Hollywood dandy Fred “Dipshit McGoo” Thompson, who pretended to run for president once, for about two months, before losing miserably everywhere, has provided us with the perfect on-ramp here. MORE »