Tag Archives: nutters

  the crazy is strong in this one

Michigan’s Beloved Janice Daniels, America’s Craziest Mayor, Perhaps Does Not Have A Fine Grasp On Detail

Troy, Michigan’s, beloved treasure of a mayor, Janice Daniels, famous throughout Wonkette nation for dressing like an Iranian man, would very much like it if the Oakland County Clerk didn’t count recall signatures that the Clerk’s office says it isn’t counting anyway. Did you read that correctly. Yes, you read that correctly. Daniels, who is facing a recall for being an embarrassingly nutters homophobe, is challenging recall petition signatures that have already been tossed out. “We’ve only done a cursory review of it because we just received it, but it appears they’re challenging signatures that we already disqualified,” [Elections Director Joe] Rozell said. “We provided them a list showing which were counted and which weren’t, but they challenged the ones we didn’t count.” Daniels had until 4:30 yesterday afternoon to challenge recall petitions. Quite naturally, she waited until ten minutes before that deadline (4:20! that’s how The Janice rolls, bitchez!) to file her not at all insane protest against already disqualified signatures. Read more on Michigan’s Beloved Janice Daniels, America’s Craziest Mayor, Perhaps Does Not Have A Fine Grasp On Detail…
  farewell my weiner

Beloved Weiner-Twitterer Anthony Weiner Resigns From Congress

Anthony Weiner is crazy for girls and crazy for Twitter, two things that do not go well together, especially when you’re a married congressman who can’t stop taking pictures of your dick and sending them to the entire Internet. So, after who knows how many weeks of Weinergate, Anthony Weiner is resigning from Congress. We’re betting those voters from his district who originally said, “Eh, let’s keep him, he’s good at going on teevee and talking about himself,” eventually changed over to, “Oh for god’s sake, quit already, and keep it in your pants for a while, iPhone sex creep.” Even Barack Obama took a moment from authorizing the bombing of all other countries to say, “Hey, Weiner? You are now officially messing with my business, which is shaking liberal millionaires down for campaign contributions. Get lost.” Good-bye, Anthony Weiner, history’s first Twitter-Congress casualty. Read more on Beloved Weiner-Twitterer Anthony Weiner Resigns From Congress…
  happy birthday moonbat

Crazy Old Michele Bachmann Is Somehow Only 55 Years Old Today

Suburban Minnesota monster Michele Bachmann is celebrating her 55th birthday today, probably by playing “pin the gun on the Kenyan.” When the certifiably insane foster-baby farmer won her congressional district seat back in 2006 (the “Year of the Democrats,” haha), who knew that she was less a clownish anomaly than the actual future of the Republican party. Who knew that this proudly ignorant, lie-spouting duckface would soon come to represent the entirety of Republican thought? When she locked her flapping lips onto then-president George W. Bush’s face at the State of the Union address back in 2007, who knew that such freakish, embarrassing behavior would soon define the entire GOP and its willfully ignorant “angry white oaf” division, the Tea Party? Congratulations, Michele! You’ve made “stupid” go mainstream in Washington! Read more on Crazy Old Michele Bachmann Is Somehow Only 55 Years Old Today…
  tomorrow's weeping eagles today

Who Is America’s Bright Young Rising Star of American Political Insanity?

Each election season brings a few new nuts to the great snack bowl of America, and we can all look back and laugh/cry over such political dingbats as Katherine Harris, Mitt Romney, Shelley “Dracula Cunt” Sekula Gibbs, Sarah Palin and Alan Keyes. These people are mostly known for losing and quitting and just being insane all the time and refusing to go away, ever. But who will be the nuthatch stars of tomorrow? They are with us already, today! And you can choose the Young Shining Rising Star of American Politics right now! These people are all so crazy and desperate, they might just show up to claim their trophy … and probably randomly attack people, with their teeth. Read more on Who Is America’s Bright Young Rising Star of American Political Insanity?…
  she's going back to poland

Helen Thomas Retires At 89

You could see this one coming: “Helen Thomas announced Monday that she is retiring, effective immediately. Her decision came after her controversial comments about Israel and the Palestinians were captured on videotape and widely disseminated on the Internet.” Read more on Helen Thomas Retires At 89…
  america's webcam pundits

Here’s the Nut Who Threatened Eric Cantor, Threatening Barack Obama a Year Ago

Ha ha, why didn’t Barack Obama have this webcam arrested LAST YEAR, before Norman Leboon “removed” Barack Obama from the White House after Norman Leboon removed all the satellites from orbit, and also the Secret Service? And why didn’t Harry Reid hold a press conference announcing this YouTube against him? UPDATE: Most hilarious Norman Leboon video ever added to this post, lol Family Guy/Star Wars. Read more on Here’s the Nut Who Threatened Eric Cantor, Threatening Barack Obama a Year Ago…
  peggy's world

Two Americas: Peggy Noonan Sees Old People

Our girlfriend Peggy Noonan has been more enjoyable than usual this year, as a tragically drawn-out Democratic primary battle provided her with endless opportunities to touch herself while Barack Obama spoke pretty things, and to then guiltily wash her hands and realize that Obama was, in fact, the Democrat and not Ronald Reagan and, indeed, kind of “multicultural,” if you get our drift. But all that tortured eloquence has vanished from Peggy’s column, because the oxycontin/vodka cocktail hit hard as soon as she finished typing the relatively sane setup of today’s “Declarations.” Read more on Two Americas: Peggy Noonan Sees Old People…
 

Gay-Hating Rep. Sally Kern Gets Passive-Aggressive Death Threats

The Oklahoma Republican who charmed her way into America’s heart by denouncing the Gay Menace is now getting angry emails from people who want her dead. But instead of just coming right out and saying it, letter-writers beat around the bush with a bunch of doublespeak. Read more on Gay-Hating Rep. Sally Kern Gets Passive-Aggressive Death Threats…
 

Oklahoma Rep. Sally Kern Hates The Gays With Vigorous, Sultry Passion

The past several years have taught us all a valuable lesson: the nuttiness of a Republican legislator’s homophobic rantings is directly proportional to the secret gay shame of that legislator, and inversely correlated to the amount of time before that person gets busted doing the thing they professed to find so repugnant. By this math, Oklahoma State Representative Sally Kern will be discovered by week’s end trolling for muff in the ladies’ room of the World Golf Hall of Fame. Read more on Oklahoma Rep. Sally Kern Hates The Gays With Vigorous, Sultry Passion…
 

Tony Zirkle’s Segregation Plan: Crazy Enough To Work?

Indiana’s favorite perpetual Congressional candidate Tony Zirkle, the Republican crackpot who once proposed using the guillotine on “porn pimps,” has another innovative new idea for America: segregation! And his Congressional opponents have called his “fringe lunatic” antics “divisive, hateful, and uninformed,” because those opponents are boring people who fear exciting new ideas. Read more on Tony Zirkle’s Segregation Plan: Crazy Enough To Work?…