NRA

Welcome to another edition of Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we bring you a bunch of stories that didn’t quite merit a post of their own, but that were far too stupid to ignore altogether. Apply alcohol directly to your central processing unit as needed. Or your computer’s. For the second week in a […]

The geniuses in the Florida Legislature are going to pass some important improvements to the state’s “Stand Your Ground” law. First off, they’re going to fix it so that you can fire a warning shot or wave a gun around for emphasis without any criminal penalty, because sometimes you don’t actually need deadly force (not […]

We recently covered the opposition to President Obama’s nominee for surgeon general from wingnuts and the National Rifle Association (but we repeat ourselves), because Dr. Vivek Murthy has in the past said that guns are not good for children and other living things. We thought at the time that such snits were just the routine […]

In another victory for the Second Amendment, students and faculty with concealed carry permits will now be allowed to keep their weapons with them on campus, YAY! Idaho is now guaranteed to be safe from campus shootings forever, because if anyone ever tries a mass shooting, there’s guaranteed to be a Responsible Gun Owner nearby […]

National Rifle Association CEO and Executive Vice President Wayne LaPierre admitted that he and most gun fondlers are motivated by fear, although he didn’t quite put it that way. At CPAC Thursday, the gun fetishist in chief shared a vision of America as a paranoid hellscape: “We fear for the safety of our families. It’s […]

The Missouri Senate lurrrvvveesss them some guns. Like they are just up in a tree kissing on guns. And they were trying SO HARD to show guns that they care, what with trying to nullify federal gun laws and getting all ground-standing and making sure young people have access to guns before they turn 21, […]

Our first submission in the pending comment queue, that purgatory where first-time comments wait to be approved or flushed, came in reply to the story about how Wendy Davis told filthy lies about being a “single mother” when she was in fact a “separated but living alone whilst not yet having filed for divorce” mother, […]

Hey, Americans! Pants-pooping child-bride-marrying bumbaclot Ted Nugent has had some serious thoughts about freedom and liberty, and also on how sad it is that certain people have gained political office. And in fact, he has some regrets. Are they regrets that he is still not dead or in jail? Sadly, they are not. But he […]

The National Rifle Association, as we all know, is a benevolent group that just wants to make sure that every American gets the chance to marry the gun or guns of their choice. So it’s not too surprising to learn that the NRA literally wrote the text for a new bill that would expand Florida’s […]

Hey, Wonkenheimers, remember after the Newtown school massacre, when the great American gun-fondling community told you to all shut up about gun control, because “too soon,” and “anyway, this is just a mental health problem”? And remember when B. Barry Bamz (D-Gungrabberistan) tried to re-implement some weentsy, window-dressing, gun-control measures like magazine-size restrictions, and was […]

Our favorite-not-favorite rocker and gun enthusiast turns 65 today! We here at Wonkette would like to wish Ted Nugent a most happy birthday (or should we say Merry Birthday, because December? We don’t want to get yelled at for using the wrong word here.) Since it is Mr. Nugent’s 65th birthday, we are sure that […]

NRA board member and bozo birthday boy Ted Nugent, who is still neither dead nor in jail, marked the one-year anniversary of the Newtown Massacre with a WND column blaming the shootings on “political correctness” and warning that unless we arm teachers, eliminate gun-free zones, and do something about mentally ill people — as individuals, […]

North Carolina Congressdope Renee Ellmers, who recently became a Wonket Hero for her brave stance on accepting her congressional paycheck during the shutdown — “I need my paycheck. That’s the bottom line” — has once again ascended the summit of Derp Mountain, this time in connection with an issue dear to her heart: she’s a […]

Here’s one to file under “Justice Delayed, but not nearly as long as we’d have guessed”: Marissa Alexander, the Florida woman who was sentenced to 20 years in prison after firing a warning shot into a wall to scare aware her (allegedly) abusive husband, will get a new trial. Alexander’s sentence got national attention because […]

We are wondering if maybe we could just work up a template for these mass-shooting stories, where we could have blanks to fill in with the location, shooter’s name, number of victims, and so on. And then we could also just plug in the idiotic things said about them within the first 24 hours while […]