Tag Archives: nie

 

Dana Perino Dumber Than Everyone Else in History

White House Press Secretary Dana Perino might not be a liar after all! All those times when she says “I don’t know” and “We’re still gathering the facts” could be 100% accurate, because she actually doesn’t know jackshit about the world around her. Perino appeared on NPR’s jolly Wait, Wait… Don’t Tell Me program this weekend and stupidly told the world a story best kept private: She has no goddamn clue what the Cuban Missile Crisis was. Read more on Dana Perino Dumber Than Everyone Else in History…
 

Insecurity Estimate

Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomatâ„¢! Last week was totally topsy-turvy in Condiland, but not really in a fun way. There was that NIE thingy which made a lot of people uptight, an absolutely awful trip to Africa, which experts tell us is the land of her ancestors, and then on to Brussels, where half the people wouldn’t shut up about Iran, and the other half nagged her about the possibly fictional land of Kosovo. But first! Gay rumors! Relive the memories of photo-ops past after the jump! Read more on Insecurity Estimate…
 

That NIE Thing is No Biggie, Really!

newVideoPlayer("NIE_Snapper.flv", 475, 376); The Bush Administration created this video to help explain why we shouldn’t worry our pretty little heads about the NIE and those silly reports that Iran stopped trying to make nukes and stuff. It stars a pussy named Mr. Big Stick and an Intelligence Official named Cherry (for reasons I’m sure will be explained to me in the comments). Yay war! Read more on That NIE Thing is No Biggie, Really!…
 

Dana Perino Spices Up Reporter’s Life

White House Press Secretary Dana Perino’s job got a little harder this week, what with the new task of convincing the public that it should consider the peaceful Iran NIE hostile. The lovely deathbot likes to take out her frustration on biased and/or dumb questioners during times like these, and today when some guy asked about AIDS research, she told him to “just stop it, stop it.” Read more on Dana Perino Spices Up Reporter’s Life…
 

When Not Actively Racist, Joe Biden Is Great

newVideoPlayer("Biden_on_Hardball.flv", 475, 376);Whenever there’s a new Bush Administration cover-up of peaceful intelligence reports, Joe Biden’s the go-to sound bite. Crazy Eyes appeared on yesterday’s Hardball to reiterate his belief that the Bush Administration has always known Iran stopped its nuke program in 2003, and that if Bush bombed them anyway, Joe would impeach him to death. [via Crooks and Liars] Read more on When Not Actively Racist, Joe Biden Is Great…
 

President Bush held a press conference today in the wake of the newly released National Intelligence Estimate on Iran, which concluded that Iran had stopped its nuclear weapons program in 2003. Bush took this great news as a “‘warning signal’ of a continuing threat from Iran.” So we’re at a point now where a massive intelligence report says Iran is not making nukes, and Bush responds with they are going to nuke us tomorrow. [NYT] Read more on …
 

The new National Intelligence Estimate (NIE) on Iran “concludes that Iran halted its nuclear weapons program in 2003 and that the program remains frozen, contradicting judgment two years ago that Tehran was working relentlessly toward building a nuclear bomb.” No word yet on whether this will affect Bush’s plans to invade Iran for working relentlessly toward building a nuclear bomb. [NYT] Read more on …
 

Mike McConnell, the national intelligence director, said today that he will not release any of the key findings from the upcoming National Intelligence Estimate on Iran to the public. Because of the terrorists and the Iraq and 9/11 or something… with us or against us… shut up. [CNN] Read more on …
 

Daily Briefing: Real and Spectacular

* Senators refuse to confirm George Casey as Army chief until he tells them where he gets the good happy drugs. [WP, NYT, LAT] * The “unpleasant but very detailed” 90-page National Intelligence Estimate on Iraq goes to Congress. The 2 pages you’re allowed to see will be podcasted. [WP] * If you give money to poor people you have to give it to rich people too, this is America, everything has to be equal. [WP, NYT] * Yes, the Senate is still talking about their, “Mr. President, don’t send more Americans into the middle of civil war!” resolution, letter, email whatever. [NYT] * Only the brain-dead pay the death tax. [WSJ] * New Iraq “casualty” count only reflects soldiers who were shot at, not who shoot themselves. [NYT] * United Nations to world: Global warming, it’s real. [LAT] * President Bush to nation: no fatties. [WP] Read more on Daily Briefing: Real and Spectacular…
 

Rumors On The Internets: Cock, Diesel

* When the FBI is doing some tapping, they lay “full pipe.” [CNET] * President Bush bulldozes the press corps. [The Gaggle] * National Intelligence Estimate on Iraq will be ready just as soon as Negroponte finishes the chapter entitled, “Why more troops would fix everything.” [TPM Muckraker] * But he better not mention “global” or “warming” in the same sentence or Condi will bleach out his windpipe. [Think Progress] * New White House pastry chef has experience making Desserts for Dummies. [Political Wire] * During the next election, John Kerry may find that Massachusetts prefers a bloody sock to his bleeding heart. [Boston Herald] Read more on Rumors On The Internets: Cock, Diesel…
 

Daily Briefing: Taking a ‘Stan

Delayed due to technical difficulties/epic hangover Terror detainee bill passes House, will “authorize the indefinite detention of non-citizens without access to courts – even if they are not charged with any crime.” [WP, NYT, LAT] Read more on Daily Briefing: Taking a ‘Stan…
 

Daily Briefing: Iraqi Idol

Under pressure, White House declassifies portions of the National Intelligence Estimate. [NYT, WP, LAT, USAT, W$J] What does it say? What does it mean? The big papers are handy with analysis. [NYT, WP, LAT] Read more on Daily Briefing: Iraqi Idol…
 

Rumors On The Internets: The Ghost Of TeeVee Future

Oprah’s not running, gives Larry King her “O-face” tonight, wants Obama in ’08. [The Swamp] Pervez “Perv” Musharraf to announce on The Daily Show tonight that’d he’d gladly give up his nuclear arsenal to get in “the sheets with Angelina Jolie.” [The Corsair] Read more on Rumors On The Internets: The Ghost Of TeeVee Future…
 

CIA Continues to Do America Proud

Yesterday, while the never-ending Hayden confirmation hearings ground our will to live into dust, Ken Silverstein posted a troubling hilarious story on the CIA in Iraq. Did you know that there hasn’t been a National Intelligence Estimate written on Iraq since November of 2004? Why doesn’t the CIA ever report the good news from Iraq, huh? Schools are being painted, guys! Former agency officials, as always, give great quote: Read more on CIA Continues to Do America Proud…
 

Intelligence Agencies To Pore Over Pictures of Your Cat

Well, we’re screwed. President Bush and U.S. policy-makers are receiving more intelligence from open sources such as Internet blogs and foreign newspapers than they previously did, senior intelligence officials said. The new Open Source Center (OSC) at CIA headquarters recently stepped up data collection and analysis based on bloggers worldwide and is developing new methods to gauge the reliability of the content, said OSC Director Douglas J. Naquin. “A lot of blogs now have become very big on the Internet, and we’re getting a lot of rich information on blogs that are telling us a lot about social perspectives and everything from what the general feeling is to … people putting information on there that doesn’t exist anywhere else,” Mr. Naquin told The Washington Times. Read more on Intelligence Agencies To Pore Over Pictures of Your Cat…
 

Chatology: America for Americans!

Sorry for the hiatus, folks. But between the dodgy servers and pictures of Katherine Harris’s breasts did you even notice? If I had to sum up yesterday’s chatfest with one word, it would be this: amneleaksty. Immigration and Fitzgerald investigation dominated — which makes sense when you realize that Fitzgerald’s grandparents were probably immigrants. Hot topics: • Immigration bill: “bureaucracy of rubber stamps” or “lack[ing] compassion”? • Leak investigation: Specter says the President needs to come clean, Kerry says “This was not a declassification to educate America, this was a declassification to mislead America.” • Nuking Iran. Scary! Quotes to live by: • Stephanopoulos wonders “how do you solve this Rubik’s cube” of the budget? • Dionne asks “What did the president forget and when did he forget it?” • George Will gets legalistic: The President “was trying to discredit, punish, or seek revenge against a critic… where in the federal statues does it say that is forbidden?” • And in case you’re wondering why he lost: Russert introduces Kerry thusly as the man who won “48.3 percent” of the popular vote. Kerry: “I thought it was 49.2″ Tim: “48.3 — But who’s counting?” After the jump: The most optimistic man in America, the calm and cool Joe Wilson (really), and a testy Schieffer. Read more on Chatology: America for Americans!…