Wonkette

“As a final note, years ago, when John Carroll was editor in Lexington, he refused to publish a series, Cheating Our Children, about the poor education in Kentucky until the writers got it down to grade level THREE. You can’t write respectable journalism at the third-grade level, can you?” [Daily Bellwether]

Condi Rice is still the Secretary of State [can an intern confirm this?], but no one likes her or cares what she has to say. According to former New York Times foreign reporter Joel Brinkley, Rice’s influence worldwide has steadily fallen since she took over for the also-unloved Colin Powell 2 1/2 years ago, because Iraq is a mess and Bush is a lunatic and she is Bush’s bestest girl ever. MORE »

If you live in a row house connected to the row house of chain-smoking Baltimore Examiner editor Frank Keegan and so much cigarette smoke is seeping into your house that your kids are choking on the fumes, it’s probably not a good idea to pound on Keegan’s door yelling about the problem as the paramedics treat your daughter, because Keegan will (allegedly) pull a shotgun on your entire family. MORE »

Guess who finally had enough of this goddamned place and moved to New York? Post owner Donald Graham! MORE »

You can laugh at California laws if you want to — except in Berkeley, where that’s illegal — but environmental legislation in the most-populated state in the union generally makes it to Washington in a decade or so. Meaning, say good-bye to your precious plastic grocery bags that probably fill about 35% of your kitchen cabinets today. MORE »

The Virginia Press Association had its big awards ceremony on Friday night, at the world-famous Watergateside Hotel, which is “separated from the waterfront by an Outback Steakhouse and a Hooters” and is also in Norfolk.

It was a magical night: The Washington Post came in third place (or lower) for (nearly) everything, Dana Milbank was burned in effigy and the Washington Times won top honors.

Read the hilarious report from our Anonymous Wonkette Operative, after the jump.

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* You have to make interim appointments with the U.S. attorneys you want to slip in, not the ones you pretend will get confirmed. [Think Progress]
* Put your money where Alberto Gonzales’ mouth is. [Intrade]
* John Edwards’ chips are already down. [Election Central]
* Too bad Rudy’s not a betting man. [Election Central]
* Presidential candidates make their “presentations” to investment bankers, no Power Point included. [Robert Reich]
* Print newspapers dying because print newspaper reporters are lazy as shit. [Romenesko]
* Chris Dodd live blogs Chris Dodd’s appearance on The Daily Show. [Chris Dodd]
* ‘07 to be that year for DC voting rights. [The Gavel]

* Gore’s gonna run, Gore’s gonna run, Gore’s gonna run — psyche! [Hotline on Call]
* Christopher Shays is a gay necrophiliac. [The Swamp]
* John Edwards gets endorsed by a not-gay former governor of New Jersey. [Election Central]
* Super Tuesday is for punk bitches — 2008’s gonna have Uber-Jumbo Tuesday Exxxtreme. [Political Insider]
* Even Bill Richardson’s mom doesn’t think he can win. [Poltical Wire]
* Wesley Clark hates the Iran war, so does his website. [YouTube]
* USA Today is building the newspaper of the future, just in time for all their readers to keel over and die. [BuzzMachine]

The bloodletting continues at the Post. Here’s all the bad news from the last quarter of 2006: MORE »

The city’s newest waste of sidewalk space, Capitol Hill rag The Politico, launched today with some heavy self-congratulation from all the Post and Time dudes they lured over there with promises of riches. What’s the verdict? It’s, uh… a website! And some blogs! It’s kind of like the Post’s politics section, except NEWER and with laxer editing in the in-house blogs: MORE »