new york post

Welcome to another Derp Roundup, the feature where we turn a pressure-washer on our browser tabs and skim off the weird, just for you. Please read responsibly and do not operate heavy machinery while under the influence of Derp. Our Lead Derp is one of those things that we didn’t know was a thing until […]

Sometimes, we are grudgingly impressed by the lengths that stupid/awful people will go in terms of their behavior in the workplace. Take for example one Mr. Ronald O. Ross, superintendent of the Greenburgh School District in New York, who managed to call his employees “bitch” in a stunning variety of ways, according to a lawsuit […]

Media, media, why hast thou forsaken us? It’s like you can’t pick up a trashy New York tabloid with wildly unfunny headlines and believe a thing they say anymore! It appears that the salacious NY Post story about Eliot ‘Client 9 Inches’ Spitzer sucking the toes of his topless girlfriend while on vacation in Jamaica […]

We are not sure what is ickier: Eliot Spitzer and his girlfriend Lis Smith doing sexxytime in a hot tub in Jamaica, or the New York Post’s description of same: Sleazy Eliot Spitzer turned a resort hot tub into a steamy love cauldron over the weekend — kissing and sucking the toes of his topless […]

The New York Post sure does have a hard-on for Eliot Spitzer lately, which is funny because he does not actually hold any elected position, but that is not stopping them from calling for New York Mayor-elect Bill de Blasio to fire some chick for being porked by Spitzer, consensually, and without (presumably) an exchange […]

Former wunderkind editor and Number One Zombie Princess Di Fangirl Tina Brown has had a Very Bad Week. First came Buzzfeed’s report that Barry Diller will finally push her out on her toned and shapely bottom, and now the New York Post has decided to publish a scurrilous report, titled “Tina Brown’s Charity Gave Out […]

The New York Post is so naughty, you guys! Naughty naughty New York Post! What have they done today? Oh, well, they have just taken a 23-year-old woman, one who maybe is unduly sexcited to be the glamorous younger other woman at the center of a disgraced politician’s unending shame, and they have put her […]

New York Post harpie-in-residence Andrea Peyser, what are you shrieking and yowling about this morning? Oh, that teen pregnancy has gone down 25 percent in New York City over the past decade, so we should stop teaching sex ed and giving out birth control? Madam, you are genius. Come, let us listen at Peyser’s gentle […]

From the “Too Little Too Late” Division of the Department of DUH, it has occurred to some Republicans that perhaps they should cultivate some lady votes next time. No idea why being absolute dicks to women voters by calling them sluts (which was, to be honest, one of the more…genteel…insults leveled) was not an awesome campaign […]

Rupert Murdoch’s New York Post has done some heavy digging, you guys, and it has discovered that the President of the United States of America sometimes go to the biggest city in the nation! Like, he was there just last week, “talking” at “the United Nations” as if that is somehow an important thing that […]

The wheezy little shadow humans hovering around in the dank caves over at Rupert Murdoch’s terror pamphlet the New York Post sure are devoting an awful lot of comical reporting to the fabrication of elaborate Jesusween bedtime stories about the Occupy Wall Street protesters. It’s like they’re kind of (very) worried or something! The latest strenuous […]

When there’s nothing else to bitch about, count on ignorant scare-sheet the New York Post to find something evil about the peaceful and polite Occupy Wall Street protesters. Maybe they are eating fancy liberal food? A new poll of New Yorkers proves that 67% agree with the growing protest against America’s bank-run corporate-welfare system, and […]

It appears that a rumor about John Boehner having an affair with a lobbyist is forming out of thin air after some Daily Kos guy said it was a rumor, so now it is a rumor. The New York Post got to the bottom of this thing: It’s a liberal blogger/media conspiracy to take down […]

MSNBC’s 6 pm host Ed Schultz and his dumb, boring show have never really seemed to fit the cable news network, and today he finds himself in the New York Post for going crazy at MSNBC headquarters at 30 Rockefeller Center a couple weeks back. This story is made all the better by the fact […]

Every now and then, the New York Post shows a hint of its acidic headline genius of yore. This isn’t it, exactly, but the underused word “crone” is perfectly illustrated by a batty old lady cackling weirdly about sending the Jews “back [to] Poland, Germany.” Ugh. But at least the right wing will now purge […]