Wonkette

* Heard on the Hill: “Why did Rep. Dan Burton (R-Ind.) miss 19 House votes over four days in mid-January? He was playing golf in Palm Springs. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: The MPAA brought in Will Smith to make lawmakers like Hollywood again… Sufjan Stevens drank at the Watergate. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Joaquin Phoenix stood next to Dennis Kucinich at a Department of Peace press conference, refused to say anything. [Examiner]
* The Sleuth: Nebraska odd couple Chuck Hagel and Ben Nelson are getting along! Finally! [WP]
* Shenanigans: Democratic Whip James Clyburn loves Jack Daniels soooo much they asked him to be their spokesman… Sen. Debbie Stabenow ripped off the Nicholson monologue from A Few Good Men on the floor of the Senate. [Politico]

* It wasn’t just Walnuts — half the Senate was passed out in their seats during SOTU. [David All]
* New blog is dedicated to the nut-mouthed wonder. [The Real McCain]
* Barack Obama has more MySpace friends than any other candidate. Barack Obama’s MySpace friends are just as retarded as every other candidate. [Personal Democracy]
* Dick Cheney always sees, “the glass half full … of poison!” [Think Progress]
* Brainless Hill staffers are easy to find. This soulless group took some digging. [TPM Muckracker]
* Nebraska’s new “terror-free” gas station is the redneck equivalent of your hybrid. [Passport]
* John Edwards tells Jason DeParle, “That’s not a house — this is a house.” [Carolina Journal]

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After the break, etc.

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In our search for most obvious rugs in Congress, we left out two audience favorites — Bill Frist and Trent Lott.

Frist, left, demands that Senator Leahy read his note aloud before the whole Senate. Lott, right, wears the scalp of late Senator Strom Thurmond in order to absorb his powers. MORE »