Tag Archives: nbc

  Sorry Canada

Canada Also Thinks Scott Walker Is A Idiot

Yeah we think he’s dumb too Fresh off his disgraceful appearance on “Meet the Press,” during which Gov. Scott Walker claimed discussions about the 14th Amendment are mere distraction from legitimate issues, like whether we should build a Mexican fence on the Canadian border, the United States of Canada has responded by saying that Scott Walker guy is one stupid fuck, eh? Christine Constantin, a spokeswoman for the Canadian Embassy in Washington DC, responded by rolling her eyes for about 13 hours, chortling, “Gag me with a hockey stick,” and finally explaining: Read more on Canada Also Thinks Scott Walker Is A Idiot…
  Here's a neat idea!

America About To Fall In Love With Scott Walker, Says Scott Walker

This will probably be news to you, America, but you are nanomilimicroseconds away from falling head over heels for Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker. True, you don’t love him now, and you’ve been liking him less and less all year, but that’s about to change. How do we know? Not because it says so on his hat, but because he said it, which pretty much makes it a fact. So, BOOM, ta da, and case closed. Read more on America About To Fall In Love With Scott Walker, Says Scott Walker…
  the drug-crimers too

All The Mexican Rapists Will Vote For Donald Trump, Says Noted Idiot Donald Trump

Donald Trump has the hottest O face of all the O faces, all the other O faces are weak.
Remember how Donald Trump says Mexican immigrants are druggy rapists from hell, but also that some of them are very nice? And remember how he hires undocumented immigrants to build his shitty-looking hotels for people with no taste? Well the first thing, according to Trump!, is true, but the second thing is a big lie, you big dumb stupid idiot. But none of that matters, because you know who loves Donald Trump so much they just can’t stand it? Those sweet, kind-hearted Mexican rapists and druggers. And if Trump gets the Republican nomination, he’s going to win ALL the Latinos, because they just won’t be able to help themselves. He said these idiot words to NBC News: Read more on All The Mexican Rapists Will Vote For Donald Trump, Says Noted Idiot Donald Trump…
  Yoogest Classiest Broad Brush Out There

Donald Trump Dimly Aware That Messicans Don’t Like Being Called Rapists And Murderers

Most accurate Trump image yet
Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.com Donald Trump Isn’t backing off from his insistence that the borders are completely open and that most of those crossing are criminals, thugs, and thuggish criminals, but he is at least becoming vaguely aware that this stance may not be universally loved. On Fox & Friends Saturday, Trump took the opportunity to explain that his immigration views were vindicated because a man who’d been deported five times was charged with murder in San Francisco last week, which simply proves that illegal immigrants are bad news. Read more on Donald Trump Dimly Aware That Messicans Don’t Like Being Called Rapists And Murderers…
  Twitter rant forthcoming

Donald Trump Fired From NBC For Being YOOOOOOOGE Racist Lick Knob

Don't show him your tits
  Sad news for all of you Donald Trump-lovers. (Those exist, we think?) The purging of Donald Trump is no longer limited to mean Spanish-speaking teevee types. After Univision decided it would no longer be airing Miss Universe pageants owned by men who call Mexican immigrants drug-criming rapists, Trump reacted with all the maturity and grace we’ve come to expect, threatening to sue the network and banning Univision employees from one of his gauche resorts in Miami. Well, we guess we should get ready for another rage-sharting Twitter rant from Trump, because NBC done fired his ass: Read more on Donald Trump Fired From NBC For Being YOOOOOOOGE Racist Lick Knob…
  Here have some news n stuff

Feminists Murder Patriarchy Again, For Ten Dollar Bill

That didn't take long
Make some celebratory sounds, ladies, because we did it! We killed the patriarchy! We’re getting so good at this, one day we might even have equal representation in government. One day. In a century, maybe. But for now, we get 10 bucks: Read more on Feminists Murder Patriarchy Again, For Ten Dollar Bill…
  What year is it again?

NBC Affiliate Decides Republican Navy Doctor Too Gay For Delicate Tennessee Viewers

So controversial.
Did you know marriage equality is a mainstream thing these days? Polling released Monday shows that fully 56 percent of Americans are more than ready for the Supreme Court to do gay marriage to the entire country, and those numbers grow every single year. So you’d think a commercial featuring a gay Republican military doctor who really wants to marry his boyfriend wouldn’t be considered “controversial.” OH BUT IT IS! At least for WRCB, an NBC affiliate in Chattanooga, Tennessee: Read more on NBC Affiliate Decides Republican Navy Doctor Too Gay For Delicate Tennessee Viewers…
  Science: Pretty Good Except For The Fake Parts

Ben Carson Lays Down Some Science For You (Depending On Your Value For ‘Science’)

No real reason for including Raptor Jesus here. We just like Raptor Jesus better than Ben Carson.
The Liberal Media tried to Gotcha! Conservahero Ben Carson again this weekend, and once more he escaped the Logic Snares set for him by secularist tricksters. He is not going to fall for your little traps, LIEberals! On NBC’s Meet the Press Sunday, Chuck Todd asked Carson how “science and religion, in your mind, coexist” — an obvious attempt to try to get him to talk about Evolution, which as any good Christian knows is poppycock. Read more on Ben Carson Lays Down Some Science For You (Depending On Your Value For ‘Science’)…
  Glad we solved that problem forever

2014: The Year All Rape Ended Forever Because It Never Existed Obviously

Our thoughts exactly
In the early days of 2014, the world was a simpler, happier place. Bill Cosby was still a kindly, grandfatherly funnyman and not a horrible monster rapist, and we all enjoyed playfully teasing him about his sweaters and Jell-O Pudding Pops until the joke was entirely played out and stale and not funny anymore, seriously, enough. Read more on 2014: The Year All Rape Ended Forever Because It Never Existed Obviously…
  We Don't Interrupt This Program...

Today’s Top Network Excuses For Not Running Obama’s Immigration Speech (1. He’s Black) Updated!

Now it's a few hundred, and still nothin' on.
Update/new development: Yr. Wonkette is psychic once again! (see end of post) Barry Bamz is going to single-handedly overthrow the rule of law tonight, but the teevee networks have decided not to carry the speech, because come on, it’s only a presidential speech, and those are lame. Or maybe they’re too partisan, according to some guy who writes a really overheated column at Politico: Read more on Today’s Top Network Excuses For Not Running Obama’s Immigration Speech (1. He’s Black) Updated!…
  If It's Sunday It's A Good Thing There's A 2:00 Replay

Scott Walker: Only ‘Fresh, Organic’ GOP Governors Can Beat Moldy Old Hillary

We have to admit, Wonketteers, that we did not stick to our Chuck Todd diet. We really did intend to get up every Sunday for Meet the Press to see Chuck’s tough questioning of the Biggest Names in News and stay in shape with his touchscreen map upper-body workouts, but it wasn’t until his first show after the Democrats were sent to live on the farm upstate that he enticed us to come back by landing an EXCLUSIVE interview with Scott Walker, King of Wisconsin. Read more on Scott Walker: Only ‘Fresh, Organic’ GOP Governors Can Beat Moldy Old Hillary…
  first day of school

Chuck Todd Meets The Press, Needs To Improve Listening Skills

Chuck Todd is so excited, you guys! It’s his first week as the new host of Meet the Press. That other guy with two first names failed his way into a $4 million buyout and NBC, looking to bring back the powerhouse once steered by Tim Russert, took the opportunity to slip Tim’s son Luke and Morning Misery Joe Scarborough in along with Chuck to lend the proper gravitas. We couldn’t wait to see Chuck’s debut Sunday morning, by which we mean we slept in and caught the late rerun. Read more on Chuck Todd Meets The Press, Needs To Improve Listening Skills…
  Shameless self-promotion

Meet The Press Is About To Get So Much Worse; You Need This Coffee Mug More Than Ever

Buy it now
Do you need yet one more reason to ignore NBC’s “Meet the Press” because you can’t get enough of John McCain and the weekly parade of the same old white dudes saying the same old white dude things? What the heck is wrong with you? FINE, be that way. Have one more reason. Heck, have two, courtesy of the New York Post’s Page Six: Read more on Meet The Press Is About To Get So Much Worse; You Need This Coffee Mug More Than Ever…
  Your morning cup of wut?

It’s Labor Day (In Case You Didn’t Know) And Other News You Can Maybe Use

If it's Sunday ... it's probably still going to suck
Everyone enjoy having the day off, except for those of you who don’t have the day off. Also, enjoy some news. Now that NBC has gotten rid of that old host of “Meet the Press” — David something? Who can remember? — the whole gang is real excited about Chuck Todd. Sundays are going to be so awesome now! Read more on It’s Labor Day (In Case You Didn’t Know) And Other News You Can Maybe Use…
  If it's Sunday David Gregory's sitting around unemployed

David Gregory Booted From NBC, At Least He Has $4 Million To Keep Him Company

This is definitely the saddest news of the day. No, the week. No, the century. Basically, it is the saddest thing ever. EVER. NBC’s David Gregory, best known for asking really great questions on “Meet the Press” and getting his objective journalist on by dancing with Karl Rove at the 2007 nerd prom, has been sacked. Ousted. Booted. Shit-canned. Read more on David Gregory Booted From NBC, At Least He Has $4 Million To Keep Him Company…