A long time ago, American treasure Tim Russert died, leaving an opening at America’s most important teevee chat program, Meet the Press. Goateed numbers nerd Chuck Todd was maybe going to take over, because why not, but then the Higher Ups at GE/NBC decided David Gregory should be the new host, because David Gregory can dance and dance, on teevee, which is the whole point of Meet the Press. MORE »

Thank you to reader “crookedE,” who writes, “I’m sure I’m not the only one who spotted this, but I just had to send it over.” In fact crookedE was the only person who contacted us with this wonderful screencap, which means the rest of you need to quit nodding off while you masturbate to “Fox and Friends” because there is important information going on over at MSNBC.

Have you heard about former Secretary of State, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff and Gulf War Hero Colin Powell? He is a Republican! The military people, they are that way, sometimes. But here’s Powell talking about the current GOP and how it’s a very silly backyard-theater troupe with its “oh guess what let’s just STOP ALL GOVERNMENT SPENDING like Dr. Paul said” nonsense, during a Depression. [Rachel Maddow]

You all catch CNN’s Reliables Sources the other day, about Jon Stewart? Exactly, so here’s a little summary. Tucker Carlson, he has not gotten over “it” from four years ago, and also he works for an NBC company, so… yeah. MORE »

Aha, so indeed it was Chris Matthews who said “oh god” as Bobby Jindal came out to deliver his prepubescent speech from the Plantation Manor. This wasn’t so hard to predict since (a) Chris Matthews has no filter mechanism and (b) he was already LOSING HIS MIND over the very concept of Bobby Jindal earlier in the evening’s programming. Ha ha why does Tweety have such vociferous hatred for Gov. Piyush “Bobby” Jindal already? He’s just some random guy. [YouTube]

Mika Brzezinski got mugged this morning waiting for her cab outside a DC hotel. That just sucks. So Joe Scarborough just keeps talking about it, while Mika says, “It’s fine. MOVING ON.” [Washington Times]

The fact that David “Diaperfuck” Vitter is leading the Senate charge against the auto bailout makes Wonkette want to give as much money as possible to the automakers. Anyway, ha, this clip is a basket of Wonders. Like a frightening tool, Vitter is shown around :40, on the Senate floor, first saying that the bailout deal is “putting the cart before the horse.” Then he hesitates, looks down in fear, and resolves to go for it: “Isn’t that… [weird facial expression] to use a common phrase… just ass-backwards?” David that is just foul! MORE »

Here are two things we are very tired of typing about, every day: Will teevee’s Chris Matthews run for the American Senate? And, Did dancey boy David Gregory officially get dead Tim Russert’s job on Meet the Press? The final (?) answers: No he won’t, and Yes he did. [Gawker/Baltimore Sun]

MSNBC blabbermouth Chris Matthews has been running around Washington and Philadelphia like a horny debutante, meeting with fancy Democrats and buying Pennsylvania real estate so that (maybe, possibly, allegedly) he could run for the Senate in 2010. His opponent would be Arlen Specter, a venerable Republican who has been a senator for nearly 30 years, a man who had CANCER, for God’s sake, and still showed up to WORK, without any hair. Will Chris Matthews be that awesome to the people of Pennsylvania? MORE »

Here is one of the only non-Palin SNL skits we’ve enjoyed in recent decades: Ben Affleck mocks the crap (however inaccurately) out of that self-righteous silvery fraud, Keith Olbermann, who some of you people inexplicably enjoy. Whatever. But we can all agree that he opens himself to some friendly mockery, right, and that he could be a team player about it when and if it does happen? Well, Olbermann is of course a parody of himself in real life and has responded angrily about the evil conservatives that are bribing NBC to BRING HIM DOWN. MORE »

Oh Pat Buchanan! He may be a cranky old racist fraud, but at least he’s an honest one who knows how to enjoy himself instead of being all dour and righteous about it. Toward the end of last night’s Special Emergency Weekend Edition of Hardball, Buchanan says his methods for encouraging black turnout would include radio ads telling people the election’s on Friday. Even Eugene Robinson has to laugh. Funnies start around the 7:20 mark. [MSNBC]