• May 27, 2012

morans

Celebrated guitar-plucking analberry Ted Nugent caused quite the stir with this delightfully braindead comment the other day: “If Barack Obama becomes the president in November, again, I will be either be dead or in jail by this time next year.” Heh indeedy, what? Perhaps that was an “assassination joke,” or he was just chugging lighter [...]

Guess who wins politically, in this pathetic “debt showdown” thing in Washington? Nobody in Washington, that’s for sure! More than three-quarters of Americans polled about the budget battles and threatened government shutdown used “negative words” including disgusting, ridiculous, stupid, childish, joke and sucks to describe the idiocy. A lot of people also said something the [...]

Well, fast forward to this afternoon. I couldn’t find the link to the newspaper story so I Googled myself. The first link to the story lead me to Wonkette, a website that specializes in satire. Wonkette spoofed the Times story under the headline: “In A Troubled Economy, Scooter Manufacturing Is The Only Successful Industry.” Reading [...]

by Josh Fruhlinger  9:40 am May 25, 2010

IT’S MORE FUN WHEN IT’S YOUR WIFE’S MONEY: Representative James Moran of Virginia used to be a stock broker, and it turns out that he did a lot of stock buying and selling — including behavior that verged on “what later came to be known as day trading” — while in Congress. Much of this [...]

Operative “Sam G.” sends us this gritty look at his “political Halloween costume,” of the popular Internet picture that launched 1,000 ships. His Internet friends will get it! If you like the idea of dressing as a wingnut Internet picture, this is your year!

Of course, Virginia has a distinguished history of being run by morans. [WTOP]

by Ken Layne  3:10 pm November 28, 2008

K-LOAD: Mouth-breathing fart-sack Kathryn Jean Lopez has posted a confusing new Word Jumble, in which she claims that Prop. 8, the Mormons’ financial assault on California homosexuals, “won by the same margin as Barack Obama did in that state.” Obama crushed McCain 61%-37% in California, while Prop. 8 squeaked by with 52%. [Andrew Sullivan]

After a week of witty meditations on Barack Obama’s America-hating friends and asking, “Who is this guy who has been running for president for two years who everybody knows pretty well after seeing him in nearly 30 debates? Did you know some crook sold him a strip of lawn once?” Sarah Palin has BLINKED and [...]

Shortly after this photograph was taken, the gentleman on the right was offered the Republican nomination for vice president. He turned it down to go run Lehman Brothers instead. Thanks to Brian for sending this along.

…which is why they are so obsessed with these matters of grave national importance. Thanks to Wonkette Operative Brian for bringing this to our attention. [Washington Post/CNN]

As America Goes, So Goes Miss USA

by Ken Layne  12:01 pm July 14, 2008

Here’s your latest “Miss USA,” falling on her ass during the Miss USA Show, just like the last Miss USA, who fell on her ass last year. But this one starts seal-clapping for herself after tumbling, which is kind of … repugnant? She was taken out back and executed immediately after the program. [News.com.au/AFP]

Thomas Jefferson invented July 4, by writing the Declaration of Independence for “Independence Day,” and later writing the Constitution, and then patriotically dropping dead on July 4. This is why George W. Bush went to Jefferson’s famous slave brothel, Monticello, to read a July 4 speech that quoted Jefferson except for the part of the [...]

Our pretend buddy and former colleague Will Leitch left the sports blog Deadspin last week. As he invented that popular website and has a reputation for being an agreeable human being — rare for the Internet — we were interested in his parting words. Here are some of them.

Oil hit a new record price today, hooray! It briefly touched $146.23 a barrel before settling down to the much more normal price of, er, $145.85. A gallon of gasoline is averaging $4.09 in the patriotic United States — with D.C. at $4.16, New York at $4.30 and West Coast prices over $4.50. Why do [...]

by Ken Layne  6:15 pm July 1, 2008

THIS WILL TURN OUT WELL: House Republicans would have to win back 19 seats in November to “Reclaim Our Majority,” which is why Roy Blunt’s big plan is to back exactly two GOP challengers. [TPM Election Central]