Tag: montana

Morans

Moocher Red States Still Don’t Want Free Healthcare Money With Obama’s Name On It

While more than half of our American U.S. states are proficient enough at math to conclude that free dollars from the federal government to expand healthcare access to low-income citizens is a really good deal, some Republicans who are...
Bestest judge EVER!

Montana Lawyers Honor Judge Who Said Slutty Teen Rape Victim Was Asking For It, Just Because

You would think, after the Montana Supreme Court censured and suspended District Judge G. Todd Baugh for issuing one of the most despicable orders to a convicted rapist ever, that would be the last we'd hear about Judge Baugh....
Helpful hints

Religious-Freedom-Curious States Maybe Rethinking That Now, Whoops

  It's not all bad news on the Religious Freedom front! Yes, Indiana is suffering under the weight of a dumb governor who signed a "religious freedom" bill explicitly designed so that the put-upon wingnuts of the state don't ever...
try not to be pregnant in Montana

Montana Invents Fun Science Experiments To Do On Ladies Who Want Legal Abortions

Pretend you're a state legislature, and you really REALLY want to make it so ladies don't do abortions, even though that is a thing that is still legal in U.S. Jesus America. You have lots of options! You could try to ban all...
Screw you, huddled masses.

Judge To Obama: Stop Letting In All Those Immigrants Who Are Already Here!

Wednesday was supposed to be the day President Obama officially rolled out the Kenyan welcome mat for all them illegals who've already snuck across our border to infect us with diseases and their strange foreign languages. But oh no,...
this is not a tip

Hotel Finds Free Money, It Is Employees’ Tips!

Are you planning to host a banquet soon, like a wedding or maybe a measles party? Haha, of course you're not hosting a measles party, because no one is doing that, dummy. But suppose you're having one of those...

How All Your Favorite Liberal Blogs Muffed The Yoga Pants Bill (Which Does Not Exist)

Two mornings ago, our husband flagged for us a silly story about some dumb Montana derp farmer trying to outlaw "simulated" nudity. He flagged this story for one reason only: WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO THE TRUCKNUTZ??? "Haha, poor TruckNutz,"...
Just having some naked fun is all

Montana Would Like To Not See Your Naked Bits, Please

Where does it say you can't ride your bike naked through the streets of Missoula, Montana, on a warm summer day, huh? Nowhere, that's where! Which is why there was absolutely nothing wrong with the "Bare As You Dare" bike...
It's a mobile command center

Montana Police Ask Homeland Security For Help Spying On Hippie Terrorists

Police in Missoula, Montana, are requesting a quarter-million dollar grant from the Department of Homeland Security so they can buy a "mobile command unit" -- an RV fitted out with communications equipment and computers and stuff -- that will...

Water Crisis: Filthy, Liquid Death In Montana, Washington, Kiev, Everywhere!

This post brought to you by the Patty Dumpling Endowed Blogging Chair For Something Nice For Once From an oil spill of 50,000 gallons in the Yellowstone river to a federal ruling on an "imminent and substantial" health threat in East Washington...
Kaarma Is A Bitch

Murder Is Illegal (Even In Montana)

A Missoula, Montana jury found Markus Kaarma guilty of deliberate homicide, just for killing German exchange student Diren Dede in a carefully laid trap. Even though he used a gun, like a good American Patriot™, AND the kid was...

It’s A Nice Day For A Wonkette Wedding

Mandatory musical accompaniment to this post, for when you decide to have a perfect day, getting MARRIED TO HEROIN. How do you throw a perfect wedding in just six weeks to celebrate your love and eternal commitment and success at...
"Bye, mongrel hordes! Thank you for coming to our inclusivity seminar and barbecue!"

KKK Guy Still Likes KKK, Except For All That White Supremacist Stuff

Well, this is weird. Seems there is a Klansman up in Montana -- coincidentally the new stomping ground of the Editrix, her boy toy and their love fetus -- who wants to rebrand the KKK as a nice fraternal...
Thanks Obama

One Guy In New York Has Ebola So You Can Totally Panic Now

That screaming hysteria you hear is the sound of everyone in New York being EXTREMELY TERRIFIED!!! or at least making jokes about being EXTREMELY TERRIFIED!!! because Ebola is real now. (You know the rule: It's real when it happens...
Ebony And Irony

Derp Roundup: Yes, Stevie Wonder Truthers Are A Thing

Oh, golly, it's time for another Derp Roundup, a chance for us to bring you some of the stories that were just too damned stupid to ignore altogether, but which didn't quite merit a post of their own. You...
But how did she end up with Twilight Sparkle's panties on her head?

Derp Roundup: KKK And James Woods Gonna Clean Up The Border

Welcome to another Derp Roundup, the feature where we collect all the stupidest stories that we couldn't find a spot for and dump them in a junk drawer for you to sort through. You may want to wash your...