mitch mcconnell
In Ploy To Weaken Obamacare, GOP Geniuses Give Obama More Power Over Obamacare
Back in November, the United States held an election that you might have heard about. And in that election one B. Barry Bamz trounced the ever loving shit out of some dude, what was his name, the guy with the hair? Unfortunately, the hair guy’s party held on to the House of Representatives and its [...]
Mitch McConnell’s Crack Oppo Researchers Reveal: Ashley Judd Is A Democrat!
There are some secret tapes of Mitch McConnell only talking, don’t be gross — and it appears the man is worse than we ever thought, in the how is he even able to dress himself much less be a Senator? way. When Ashley Judd said she was thinking hard about a possible run for Mitch’s [...]
Shhh! Don’t Tell Anyone About Mitch McConnell’s Secret Plan To Overturn Obamacare
Clearly, this particular portion of yr Wonkette has done something terribly wrong. First, we had to climb the word-mountain of stupid that is Megan McArdle and today we have to self-flagellate by reading this endless cockgobbling National Journal story about Mitch McConnell wherein we learn that he has a secret plan to repeal Obamacare. We’re [...]
Young Fresh With-It Dude Mitch McConnell Delighted With His Hilarious Funny About Hillary Clinton, Aged Crone
It is time once again for CPAC, people tell us, which means the universe itself has stopped on its axis so that we all might gawk in wonder at the most important conclave to ever unite in snake-handling and griftiness. But lo! Who is that hip and happening groovy young man? It is Mitch McConnell, [...]
In Bid To Out-Hollywood Ashley Judd, Mitch McConnell Campaign Releases Dystopian Horror Film
Since Mitch McConnell’s campaign released its terrifying horror movie “McConnell Shake,” and now owns every Youth Vote and also the Vote of every Kentuckian who loves French Surrealism (and they are, of course, legion), Ashley Judd is probably gonna have to show her boobs a whole lot more. [TPM]
Anti-McConnell Super-PAC Tweets Stupid Racist Things About Mitch McConnell’s Wife
In any political operation, there’s this thing called “message discipline.” Not only does it mean staying on the talking points (“It’s the Economy, stupid!”), but of course it also means Don’t hand your opponent a gift by saying something so incredibly stupid and offensive that it lends itself to a headline like “Liberal Super PAC [...]
Conservatives Attacking Ashley Judd Mistakenly Focus On Her Awesome Political Beliefs Instead Of Her Crappy Movies
Vagina-American Ashley Judd is rumored to be in the early stages of a establishing a campaign against Senate Minority leader and real life one-dimensional House of Cards stereotype Mitch McConnell. Judd would enter the race with excellent financing, is universally well known, and is a genuinely nice person who devotes her time to fighting sexual [...]
Groggy Old Mitch McConnell Bothering Pentagon About Nonsense Again
Mitch McConnell was a busy guy back on Nov. 14 — it was the day of the first Benghazi briefing, for one, and it was also the day he happened to be re-elected Senate minority leader. Amid all this excitement, however, he also sent a letter to the Pentagon’s congressional liaison, asking about a very [...]
Mitch McConnell Has New Enemy No. One: Smokey The Bear
Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell has been mumbling a lot of SCIENCE about how the dumb president will not do Mitch McConnell’s job for him by finding a trillion dollars in spending cuts that would meet Mitch McConnell’s approval. So everyone was like “why don’t YOU propose the spending cuts, Mitch McConnell?” but Mitch McConnell [...]
Loyal Opposition Mitch McConnell Now Filibustering His Own Bills, For Comity, And Freedom
Frankly, we are surprised it took this long — three years and ten and a half or so months into Barack Obama’s Purple Reign — for Senate Minority Leader and King of All He Surveys Mitch McConnell to become so demented that he is now forced to filibuster his own bills. This man, he is [...]
GOP Senators Have Had Quite Enough Of Your ‘Research’ And ‘Economics’
Are you tired of petty partisanship, of red/blue bickering, of the enthusiastic embrace of blatant falsehoods generated for political gain? Well you can cross another enemy off the list, because Senate Republicans have finally stood up to the reprehensible grandstanding of … the Library of Congress. Yes, dear citizens! The library’s reign of terror is [...]
blog advertising is good for you
