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Posts Tagged ‘missed connections’

Robot Corpse Of Miss USA Located Near Press Elevators

Tuesday, August 26th, 2008

Mail order brideHere’s everything you need to make your very own Miss USA! Some assembly required. Shortly after this photo was snapped, your editor came face to face with Chuck Todd coming off the press elevator. He is magnificent in person.


Wednesday, September 5th, 2007

Okay, maybe it really was a misunderstanding, considering that Larry Craig is too fucking stupid to even successfully call his lawyer, as this pathetic wrong-number voicemail message makes clear. [Associated Press]


Chugging Wine Behind the Gas Station: Young GOP’ers In Love

Tuesday, February 6th, 2007

The devil will see you now. - WonkettePlease, DC cabbies, install little video cameras and send us the footage!

Shared a cab…refused to give you my number…. - w4m
Reply to: pers-274090894@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-02-05, 10:50PM EST

So we shared a cab ride back to Rossyln…stopped at a gas station…drank a bottle of wine….I was wasted you were so nice….I feel sooo bad….and I didn’t give you my number…but your really cute….and this is really gay….so I hope you respond :)
Location: Smithpoint

This is actually the complete opposite of “gay,” but what do you expect from Smith Point regulars? MORE »


Murdered Children Are HAWT!

Tuesday, October 31st, 2006

What can we even add to this?

Capital Club Halloween Party - Looking for Jon Benet - m4w
Reply to: pers-227695292@craigslist.org
Date: 2006-10-30, 11:19AM EST

I am trying to reach Jon Benet Ramsey, from the Capital Club/Smith Point party at the Galleria Sat night. IF anyone has any information I am offering a $100 reward for information leading to her identity!!!

About me - [He actually put his name here]
* this is in or around DC

MORE »


Metro Section: Adams Morgan and the Hill Really Far Apart

Tuesday, August 29th, 2006
  • “Yes, they’re trying to rename the neighborhood just north of Massachusetts Avenue NE ‘NoMa.’” We’re just as sorry as you. [Cafe 227]

  • Farmer’s market in the Department of Transportation’s Nassif Building courtyard. [Beyond The Mall]
  • WP restaurant reviews “written by one of two kinds of people: restaurant owners or sociopaths.” And by sociopath you mean Tom Sietsema. [Ar-Jew-Tino]
  • Interesting question (”When (if ever) do you tell people that you have a blog?”) devolves into Jeff Foxworthy bit: “Let’s face it, women don’t do a very good job of differentiating between deceitful lies of omission and the more benign white lies that guys sometimes tell just to avoid having long, drawn out conversations.” You might be a blogger. [Good at Drinking, Bad at Life]
  • “MC with the Woman who’s dog fell out of her SUV.” [craigslist]

Brit Hume Stalking Self
Or, Missed Connection To My Heart

Wednesday, August 16th, 2006

brithumefacebook.jpgWe assumed the FoxNews promotional budget was a little higher, but no need to waste money on pro marketing when you’re always on top. MORE »


M4the Press

Thursday, July 6th, 2006

russertmc02.jpgWeep to this tragic tale of an impolite journo-celebrity. A young man with a “terrifically hot girlfriend” is snubbed — snubbed! — by regular-guy and noted father-lover Tim “Little Russ” Russert. The gentlemen greeted the Ultimate Insider with a hearty “good evening, sir!” Did Tim return the salutation? “No, you just kept walking to your Lexus SUV.”

We happen to know that the only way for a peon to get a response from Little Big Russ is with a fist and the words “go Bills,” but we wouldn’t want anyone to have to lower themselves to that kind of pandering behavior. Have a little dignity, Washington. The full ad is reprinted for your amusement after the jump.

MORE »


The Chairmanship of the Judiciary Committee and Two-Fifty Will Get You a High Life In This Town

Thursday, June 8th, 2006

Arlen Specter (R-Sad Sack) is one of those Senate Republicans who likes to put up at least a facade of independence. Which, despite the total lack of results ever, is fun when it leads to stories like the one in the Times today about how Dick Cheney told the rest of the committee to block testimony from TelComs, but didn’t tell Arlen about it beforehand. Which leads to that strongest of Washington weapons, the angry mildly peeved letter: MORE »


Today In Sarcastic Missed Connections

Monday, March 6th, 2006

Is everyone else as cranky as we are today? How else to explain the prevalence of obviously opprobrious craigslist postings — and on the Missed Connections board of all places, generally the home of crushingly banal sincerity (it is, after all, hard to be insincere about desperation and lust). First up, a reader notes that the last month has seen a remarkable number of M.C.s at a certain building that happens to be home the Office of Special Counsel. This one reads sincere. This one, not so much: MORE »


Discretion Is the Better Part of Uselessness

Friday, March 3rd, 2006

For filing under “too cryptic to be helpful”: MORE »


A Slight Whiff of Puke Drives Us Crazy Too

Wednesday, March 1st, 2006

This morning’s Craigslist mailbag offers this gem: MORE »


Sleepless In the Dirksen Building

Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006

carmensandiego.jpgA brief update to yesterday’s story on the HRC staffer who felt the need to go all the way to Baltimore for a little anonymous sex: MORE »