Tag: minnesota

Someone Is Intentionally Sabotaging Minnesota’s Health Care Exchange Enrollment, Isn’t That Neat?

How evil do you have to be to intentionally sabotage people trying to buy health care?
Doing much better now

Jerk Lady Guilty Of Trying To Make Somali Woman Speak English By Hitting Her In Face With Beer Mug

Thank goodness irrational fear of foreigners doesn't lead to tragic results.

Hey, All Y’all Who Whine That ‘All Lives Matter’: Tell It To This Little Black Girl

Nine-year-old Zianna Oliphant spoke unforgettable words to the Charlotte City Council. Will people listen?
Still neither jailed nor dead

Ted Nugent Disgusted By Wimpy Stabbing Victims, Just Disgusted

Ted Nugent is pretty disgusted by people who let themselves get wounded by knife-wielding maniacs. They're so pathetic.
Financial model remarkably similar to Trump's

Michele Bachmann Advising Donald Trump On International Policy, Radical Islam, Underpants Gnomes

Michele Bachmann is advising Donald Trump on foreign policy. How's that for a kick in the pants?
He seems nice

Minnesota GOP Congressional Nominee Has Fun, Creative Views On Women, Slavery, Everything

Meet Minnseota's brand new rightwing GOP nominee for Congress. He has the potential to out-Bachmann Michelle Bachmann, but comes from a swing district, thankfully.

Michael Jordan Would Like To Have A Word With You People About Police Violence

Michael Jordan is a very big superstar important person! Will this help change the conversation?

Barack Obama Says ‘We Are Not As Divided As We Seem’ And We Even Believe It For A While

Barack Obama calls for healing after another wound to America's heart. We're just saps enough to be optimistic, a little.
We knew Judge Dredd. You, sir, are no Judge Dredd

Donald Trump To Be Law And Order President, Execute All Black Teens Not Playing Checkers

Donald Trump continued to crib lines from Richard Nixon's 1968 playbook, promising to be the 'law and order candidate' of 2016. His vow to crack down on hippies may not resonate quite as well.

Another Black Man, Philando Castile, Shot Dead By Police, Because That’s What Happens In America

Philando Castile was a law-abiding citizen who was reportedly complying with police orders, and now he is dead.

CNN Steps On Own Dick, Wonders If Prince’s Death Is Good News For Trump And Hillary

Know what's been nice? Since Prince's untimely passing on Thursday, people really haven't said hardly anything shitty about it. Cities large and small have gone purple, the cast of Broadway's The Color Purple sang the tribute to end all tributes, and...

Prince Will Never Die

What in the hell is wrong with 2016, when it comes to God taking away our greatest icons? TMZ is reporting that Prince has died at age 57: The artist known as Prince has died ... TMZ has learned. He was 57. Prince's...

Servers Tell Boss To Take Her Crap Anti-Minimum-Wage Op-Ed And Shove It

Oh hey, it's a Maine story (about the minimum wage, no less) that doesn't directly involve Gov. Paul LePage! Five servers at a restaurant in Portland called Five Fifty-Five have quit in one hell of a mic drop, giving their notice...

Stories Of Staggeringly Dumb Restaurant Customers, Part 2

Welcome back to Off The Menu, where we bring you the best and strangest food stories from my email inbox. This week, we've got a special bonus week of more Dumb Customer stories, because WOW do I have a...

Joe’s Crab Shack Very Sorry For Serving Crab Nachos With Side Of Lynchings

Hey, you know what really gets customers in the mood for colorful crab mimosas? Classic, old-timey depictions of festive lynchings! SOUND BUSINESS MODEL, JOE'S CRAB SHACK. Joe's Crab Shack, aka "That Place That Probably Isn't As Gross As Red Lobster,...

Marco Rubio Wins A State, Still Second-Place Champion Of Our Hearts

Aww, serial state-loser Marco Rubio finally won a place! We wonder, though, if this means he'll have to bow out of his run for Second-Place President of the United States of America? Aww, poor Marco; no matter what he...