midterms
ELECTION SHOCKER: Christine O’Donnell Didn’t Go To Oxford
If those previous Christine O’Donnell revelations didn’t lock up these midterms for the Democratic Party, surely this will: Her LinkedIn profile is incorrect! She didn’t go to the University of Oxford, even though she said she did! Hooray, all is saved! Democrats will have a full 80 seats in the next Senate! Ignorance is out, [...]
Scared-of-Elections Guy Evan Bayh Says Democrats Will Lose Election
Evan Bayh wants everyone to know that Democrats are going to lose a lot of seats in the midterms this year. “I think it’s of comparable magnitude,” he said, referring to party losses in 1980 and 1994. One of those seats the Democrats will lose is Bayh’s, because he likes to drop out of elections [...]
Republican Governors Make a Movie Trailer Thing Too
OH MY GOD WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE IF REPUBLICANS DO NOT KILL ALL OF THESE DEMOCRAT SPACE MONSTERS BEFORE THEIR MOTHERSHIP COMES! Yes, like the Democratic Governors Association, the RGA has come up with a movie trailer for this election to rile up their base. And it actually has much higher production value [...]
Bachmann Says Republicans Will Do Nothing But Issue Subpoenas If They Become Majority
Oh, here is your modern-day Edmund Burke, revealing what she thinks the GOP’s political philosophy should be when they win a Congressional majority in the midterm elections: “I think that all we should do is issue subpoenas and have one hearing after another. And expose all the nonsense that is gone [sic] on. And it’s [...]
Shocker: Democrats Pass Popular Law, May Win Election
It will of course be physically impossible for the Democratic Party to keep control of the House and Senate after the upcoming midterm elections. This is because, after sneakily running as the more conservative of the two major American political parties in 2008, they immediately launched a full-on Marxist agenda upon taking office, by regulating [...]
Emergency Wonkette Endorsement: ‘Jody Hice’ For Whatever He’s Running For
More proof that Wonkette readers are the best and most attractive readers on the whole Internets! A casual mention that we aren’t up on any of the hilarious goings-on in today’s Georgia primary immediately gets us a tip from hero commenter TJBeck that we should take a good, hard look at one “Jody Hice.” Just [...]
Hillbillies To Rescue America’s Unemployed
With handsome devil Carte Goodwin scheduled to be sworn in as Robert Byrd’s seat-warming replacement sometime today, Democrats (plus the reliable communist ladies from Maine) should be able to break the Republican filibuster and get that lucrative government money flowing to the unemployed again, huzzah! Plus they plan to spend the whole midterm campaigning telling [...]
Unpopular John Boehner Scams Money From Old People
Fundraising fever: everybody’s CATCHING IT! People are giving Mitt Romney and Sarah Palin and Mike Huckabee — none of whom hold elected office of any kind or have any power or influence — hundreds of thousands of dollars. These people are already pretty well off, too! Naturally, John Boehner, a real live elected official who [...]
Nancy Pelosi Will Kill The Crap Out Of Robert Gibbs, As Soon As She Figures Out Who He Is
Ha ha, remember when Robert Gibbs said that the Democrats would probably lose control of Congress, if they didn’t shape up? Well, it appears that this news eventually filtered back to the Democrats who still (for the moment) run the House, particularly one Nancy Pelosi, and she and they are pissed and will cut a [...]
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