middle east
‘Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Too Hard To Solve,’ Says Forceful Leader Mitt Romney
A happy Mitt Romney Whitey Tape Day to each and every one of you! By now, you are well aware that Mitt simply does not care for the 47 percent of Americans who, due in part to tax-cutting policies put in place by Republican presidents, don’t count Federal income tax among the array of taxes [...]
Iran’s Stubborn Refusal To Start Building Nukes Hindering Fun War Plans
Here’s a typical variation on the same disturbing/hilarious lede that we see every few months, each time rendering satire useless: “Reporting from Washington— As U.S. and Israeli officials talk publicly about the prospect of a military strike against Iran’s nuclear program, one fact is often overlooked: U.S. intelligence agencies don’t believe Iran is actively trying [...]
24 Protesters Killed In Libya; Mideast Violence Continues
Libyan security forces killed at least twenty-four protesters during yesterday’s Day of Rage, according to Human Rights Watch. (HRW has also confirmed that Moammar Gadhafi “likes it in the cornhole.”) Demonstrations were held in Tripoli as well as several other cities, with some protests continuing into Friday morning. And in a hilarious attempt to conceal [...]
Entire Middle East Now Stickin’ It To the Man
There is so much civil disobedience happening everywhere, except here in terrible America, where it is probably needed the most: Mubarak is in coma-exile, Iran just exploded again, and there’s been all sorts of anti-government protests and political unrest in Bahrain, Yemen and Libya. The United States has lots of navy boats stationed in Bahrain, [...]
Glenn Beck Explains World With Chalk and Construction Paper
Glenn Beck seems to think this is the most important idea he has ever had, so let’s pay attention! Sure, this video appears long, but if you look at it on a conclusions-jumped-to-per-minute basis, it all goes by pretty quickly. LOOK YOU GUYS, GLENN BECK’S CONSTRUCTION-PAPER CAMPFIRE HAS JUMPED OVER TUNISIA AND INTO EGYPT. The [...]
Egypt On the Verge, Biden Praises Mubarak, Protests Spread To Yemen
How many awful, corrupt U.S. client states in the Middle East will collapse under the weight of immense daily protests? The anti-government movement in Egypt makes its biggest show today, with massive numbers of people filling the streets of nearly every big town. Hosni Mubarak’s government has responded in a slow, plodding way but is [...]
AGAIN, WE MUST NOT OVERREACT TO ONE FAILED UNDERPANTS DIME-BAG COCKBOMBER: “In addition to affecting people from Yemen, Nigeria, Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia, all citizens from such countries as Lebanon, Libya, Iraq, Pakistan and Somalia must receive a pat down and an extra check of their carry-on bags before boarding a plane bound for the [...]
Mitt Romney Presents His Nuanced Take On Middle East Geopolitics
It took us so long to check it out, but we finally did, and guess what? Mitt Romney’s “Free and Strong America PAC” website has any number of funnies! There are all these videos of him yelling at Obama for doing things that Mitt Romney did like 20 times when he was governor of Massachusetts. [...]
Condi: Either We Stay In Afghanistan Forever, Or Every American Dies Again, Just Like On 9/11
Hey did you guys know that Condi Rice is a dipshit still? It’s in the latest news information! “The last time we left Afghanistan, and we abandoned Pakistan … that territory became the very territory on which Al Qaeda trained and attacked us on September 11th. So our national security interests are very much tied [...]
Mike Huckabee Would Not Be A Good Envoy For Israeli-Palestinian Peace Talks
Very funny things happen when Mike Huckabee opens his mouth and says words about foreign policy. Remember the above clip from one of those hilarious 2008 GOP primary debates? He just had no idea what to say! And things don’t seem to have changed much, given today’s very confident declaration of no-peace.
Iraq, Egypt, Whatever, Just Make Sure To Bomb It All
This “mini-Katrina” of a Fox News gem is a few days old, but we want to ensure that everyone on the Internet sees it. What’s more interesting is how Iran, Israel, Syria, and Jordan hover as parallel planes 10,000 miles above the Earth’s surface. Also, there is no country named “Jordan,” come on, that can’t [...]
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