Wonkette

The rampant, raging Absolut vodka controversy took on new dimensions this weekend when a pack of insane nativists vowed to boycott Absolut and demanded the firing of the employee who approved an ad that encourages the Mexicans to take over the Northern Hemisphere. To be fair, it is well known that The Illegals and their cohort take most of their political marching orders from liquor ads. MORE »

• Nothing gets a candidate ready for some swiftboating like putting up with Hillary Clinton. [Headline Junky]
• Hey, look! Barry Obama can beat Hillary Clinton and still have time to do more international diplomacy than the State Department. [Horserace]
• Having a hard time sourcing rumors about Hillary dropping out of some upcoming races to attack Barry from the sidelines? Go figure! [Hot Air]
• Hey look who writes fiction! Just like the New Yorker! [IMAO]
• Fred Thompson’s campaign ruined his campaign. [Michelle Malkin]
• Mitt Romney: friend of the billionaire. [MoJo]
• Larry David killed people in New Hampshire today. [Fresh Intelligence]

• Barry Hussein isn’t fooling anybody in Nevada with all his dumb lies. [Las Vegas Review Journal]
• Tell the feds to keep their laws of our emissions. [Los Angeles Times]
• Oh, hey, Rudy is still running. [Politico]
• But what does Iowa mean for Al Gore? [Headline Junky]
• Huckabee, I don’t mind telling you, is a Jew. [IMAO]
• Michelle Malkin loves pee cock. [Michelle Malkin]
• And my oh my that Mittens sure is handsome! [Redstate]
• Funny picture. [Deadline Hollywood]

• Christmas was ruined for so many this year by taser-wielding, Jesus-hating maniacs. Or, at least it happened in this one case. [WorldNet Daily]
• We’re pretty sure Tom Tancredo’s endorsement wasn’t a “stinging setback” for anybody but sometimes it’s nice to pretend. [Hot Air]
• Crazy Michelle Bauchmann wants you to know that Iraq is almost healed! They passed a pension bill, and that’s more than we’ve got. [Right Wing News]
• Malkin stays awake all night, just waiting for someone to write something about Al Sharpton. Then, finally, at 5 in the morning, she caught a big one! Congrats, Michelle! [Michelle Malkin]
• Huck hates the Pope and we’re not sure how well that’s going to play in Iowa. [Fresh Intelligence]
• Obama is the only person running for something who objects to Bush’s FEC nominee and therefore conspiracy! [Redstate]

While Republicans in Congress are groping around for new arguments to deny poor kids health coverage, brilliant young conservative minds are posting their ideas on YouTube. This video — which Michelle Malkin picked up yesterday — suggests that if we want an expanded SCHIP, all Americans will have to start smoking to pay for it. Fair enough.

SCHIP: Care Enough to Smoke? [YouTube]

Dick Cheney dressed up his two doggie woggies for Halloween! That’s “Dave” on the right as Superman, and “Jackson” on the left as Dick Cheney. Ooh, also: Michelle Malkin’s costume was an Asian. [AP]

The triangular parry-thrust between conservative commentator Michelle Malkin, Geraldo Rivera and Bill O’Reilly — who for the first time in his stupid life has come across as the least douchey in a group setting– has resulted in Malkin quitting her frequent side gig as an O’Reilly Factor co-host. Rivera hurt Malkin’s feelings (she sometimes has them!) when he told the Boston Globe recently that Malkin was “the most vile, hateful commentator I’ve ever met…. It’s good she’s in D.C. and I’m in N.Y. I’d spit on her if I saw her.” Rivera sort of apologized later during an appearance on the Factor, but the publicity has led Malkin to the conclusion that being an interviewer-subject on teevee offers much less self-satisfaction than viciously attacking people online (agreed).

This is no conjecture on our part, either: Michelle Malkin sent out a heartfelt e-mail explaining her quitting! MORE »

Listen people: If you want to send “political” e-mail, do it from special secret political e-mail accounts. Have you learned nothing from Karl Rove and the Bush Administration? We received one lonesome message protesting the fact that we noted Jesse Malkin’s very public slide into low-budget amateur porn, and here it is:

Subject: Humorless
From: “Pat_R[redacted]@nps.gov”
11:56 am (32 minutes ago) MORE »

It’s Friday, so here’s the General Counsel for the Black Panther Party calling Michelle Malkin a whore on Fox. MORE »